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6/9 c4 1thewookie1
I'd be angry that he shot at the main characters but he's a WWI soldier with PTSD. Plus he may have been trying to force them to surrender with the first shot missing a rather slow and large target.
6/9 c3 thewookie1
When a random German trooper from WWI gets trapped in a fantasy world; interesting concept.
6/6 c4 Guest
Epic, Keep posting! :)
6/3 c4 Brenne
I think Fred needs a time out and have his gun confiscated for a while for shooting at unarmed children. I just hope he doesn't waste his bullets at the Cursed Caldera. I wonder what happens next! Looking forward to more! XD
6/3 c4 Pop
Good job this history is very original
5/16 c3 Pop
Good job dude 10/10
5/14 c3 Pop
10/10 good job dude
5/5 c3 Brenne
I wonder what elves will think when they find out about a human who comes from a world where magic isn't real, instead it's a world of machines and industrialization? I wonder what happens next! Looking forward to more! XD
3/17 c2 Guest
This is a great concept, and so far well-executed.
Just remember, without industrial infrastructure he can't make reliable ammunition, so his rifle won't be very useful for very long (good thing or he'd be somewhat overpowered at range and this story would get boring.)
2/27 c1 2Lumiere D'Amour
This is intriguing. It's a more unique plot than I've seen in awhile for "OC from Earth falls into fictional world" stories. Ahahaha, the dude with the sun dagger! He's one of my favorite minor characters from Dragon Prince. I enjoy his theatrics! He should make a REALLY fun traveling companion. I love OC stories that start their journeys with minor characters as much as the ones that immediately start with the major characters.

I find stories like the first are usually more slower paced but involve more world and character building, which is great since the minor characters have so much potential to play with! Out of curiosity, is English your first language? Since this story starts in World War I Europe and there's some German, I wondered. I might be wrong.

Some feedback: I think your chapter here could use more paragraph breaks. It's easier to read and absorb details in smaller chunks versus a big paragraph spam like your second paragraph. It's a lot of information. I also notice sometimes you forgot to start a new line here and there when a new character speaks.

I also recommend a transition break/line between when your character gets knocked out in Europe and then when he wakes up in Katolis with Tristan. A simple border inserted or dashes between the paragraphs serve as a great transition marker. There should be a new line break each time you switch between character dialogue. If this is something you struggle with, you could always ask a beta reader to help you with it and give you more indepth feed back.

Despite how short your chapter is, your characterization is good! The time with Tristan is very short, but his character seems spot on. I look forward to seeing where this story goes if you choose to continue with it!

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