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20h c15 1Taracinablue
Hm. I'm trying to wrap my head around this unusual post-death realm. Samtra has all the memories of her life, apparently can experience new things-but only what Challa brings her. Challa is also her only source of new information.
Not sure why the deities of their universe paired them together.

I'm also wondering where you're going with the bit about Noah's Ark. I hope someone mentions that the flood was because mankind was extremely wicked and deserved judgment; it wasn't random or on innocent people. (Of course the animals didn't sin, but there are always consequences for sin, and sin affects more than just one individual.)
1/3 c14 Taracinablue
Whoops. The possibility that little brother teasing could cause serious offense didn't occur to me until you mentioned Challa's "medieval" culture. I bet Leo (and maybe Don) had to go explain some things to Mikey after this.

Jake seems like a surprisingly reasonable guy. Glad he's the one watching from above.
12/20/2020 c13 aviick
True, you do not have to chronicle the daily occurrences of your characters, as the sense of time passing is clear here. It adds to the "charm" of the story; what would happen if you found yourself, trapped, in a situation like this? In theory, you would continue to live or exist to the best of your abilities. I imagine no difference here. Says a lot about the spirit of your characters. And, with time, comes new 'living'.. lol. "Leo's got a girlfriend" is a funny way to make that point.
12/18/2020 c13 Taracinablue
Ah, I was just wondering how much time had passed. Challa must be a quick learner to pick up katas and move to sparring so quickly.

Just curious... why did Challa ask for help with an itch instead of scratching it herself?
12/17/2020 c12 Taracinablue
Aw, I thought you were going to have Challa be super fluffy after drying off, lol.

Oh, interesting. The mage can't do any magic so far from her home. I bet this obstacle will be overcome later somehow... but for now, the guys will make great teachers in ninjitsu!
12/13/2020 c12 aviick
Interesting turn of events. A challenge in which Chanchalla could not find herself surrounded by better characters to arrive at a better understanding of herself and her strengths (or so I imagine). One of the elements of these stories that make them enjoyable is the sheer confidence that the characters can possess and the journey to connect with that inner power for the ones who are not there yet.
12/13/2020 c11 aviick
I think I like "padding" better than "filler" as the way to describe a staging chapter. Still keeps the reader on the storyline, as there are always details or references that you provide that will come back in surprising ways.
12/13/2020 c10 aviick
Why the last chapter for a while? But it's good to focus your talents on one storyline over multiple stories at times, especially if feeling inspired to do so. This, like the last chapter, provides the reader with details and develops characters further along. If you stick to your more typical schedule, then the upcoming chapter (or next few) will lead the reader further along to grit of the story. Take your time! Looking forward to the twists and turns...
12/13/2020 c9 aviick
This chapter is an example of how well you can add details to a story and to the characters without it feeling like a 'filler'. You blend the use of narrative well with the use of description to keep the reader moving along and gaining insight.
12/3/2020 c11 Taracinablue
Oh, good, clothes for Challa! Especially since she's more human in appearance than the turtles, who can get away with not really wearing clothes.

Ah, as I suspected, seafood is fine for her. Good, that simplifies the turtles feeding their visitor. Could add up, though, depending on how long she's around.

Hmm, Challa liked the wacky vintage movie. Well, one never knows what might tickle someone's fancy.
12/1/2020 c10 Taracinablue
Lol, I wouldn't think Mikey would mind the cheese reference. He doesn't seem to care about messiness, or his reputation about messiness.

Oh, good, Leatherhead is calm today. An outburst from that guy would set Challa back days in her progress coming out of her (figurative) shell.
11/28/2020 c9 Taracinablue
I'm unfamiliar with these Rescue Heroes... they sound quite a bit like the Thunderbirds, though. I certainly didn't expect any human interference in this story!

Oh, interesting, you've given Challa a foil. I'm quite surprised you told us some of Samtra's thoughts, seeing as she's, y'know, dead and all.
11/27/2020 c8 aviick
Funny intro to the chapter.. I think most readers can relate to the experience of entering someone's room and being met with odd aromas and crumbs (ewww). I enjoyed the dream sequence and the introduction of almost a 'spirit guide' (with a spiritual leash concept, lol). The chapter quickly builds Chanchalla's story line and gives the reader a heads up on what to look for as significant to the plot.
11/27/2020 c7 aviick
Strong chapter. Again, you do a good job of telling two sub-stories and linking them. Here, you have the newness of differences between the two worlds, but the sameness of experience when it comes to how divisive the world can be at times. Interesting theme whether in the now or not.
11/25/2020 c8 Taracinablue
Lol, poor Challa, having to stay in Mikey's room. Is she going to pull a "Snow White" and clean it while she's there?

Ooh, the three moons and auroras sound super pretty. I suppose it makes sense that people living on such a planet would get superstitious about stars. Are the moons different sizes and colors?

Wow, apparently Janah have a pretty strong dream world. Actually, this sounds a bit like the Avatar:TLA "spirit world." Does the snake girl know who killed her, or was it a sneak attack?
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