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for The Christmas Hail Mary Mission

1/4 c1 118katbybee
This one was just a lot of fun and felt like it would have been a perfect Christmas episode. You kept everyone in character, and I heard all the dialogue in the various characters’ voices from the show. Hogan was particularly spot-on in this story, but the whole thing was just a delight. I like how you kept things very much in canon and swept the reader along for the ride the same way the show did. That isn’t easy to do, and I commend you for it. I also appreciate the fact that you were careful with your grammar and punctuation, so that I was not pulled out of the story at any point. That is another sign of a good writer. I haven’t been writing as much in this fandom lately, as my muse has pulled me in other directions, but I am always happy to see new writers in here. I don’t know how long you’ve been writing in here, so perhaps I should say, new writer to me, anyway. But you are quite talented, and I really enjoyed this lovely Christmas tale!
12/28/2020 c1 71snooky-9093
Welcome back to the fandom and a belated Merry Christmas. This had me smiling from beginning to end.

You worked wonders with phrasing. First, an example: Hilda’s infatuation “ Hilda was getting slightly lost in a haze of Hogan, how could a prisoner who smelt like bad army cologne hiding the fact he'd probably not showered in a week be so intoxicating?”
And a descripton of Schultz here: “said bowl of jelly waltzed in”

Why Hogan would go along with an insulting translation of the lyrics is a mystery-but I had to admit it was funny.

Hiding the explosives in the presents was a good plot device-also, I appreciated the mention that some of these men were not used to being outside the wire.

Klink’s awful violin playing was a good way to distract the Germans from the French lyrics.

It’s nice to see Hogan almost taking the punishment (after all, he’s in charge)…that’s different. Of course, he always manages to worm his way out.

A nice addition to our community of holiday stories.
12/26/2020 c1 20Tuttle4077
This was a fun little adventure for Christmas. I really liked the opening scene- it sounded like our heroes with Hogan kvetching just a little and Newkirk making a joke that actually inspires him.

There were some really clever lines of dialogue and narration (Klink security riding crop. Bwah!) and "Oh, she's your secretary?" actually made me laugh out loud. So cheeky.

But I have to ask: isn't a present-shaped box... just a box?

I feel like perhaps one of your future stories should expound on poor Carter's troubles with authority and all those walls he's put up.

Cheers.
12/26/2020 c1 5Tiny1217
This was a fun little story. There are a few parts that could use a bit of improvement, like commas missing, for example, but overall it was still fun to read. The French lyrics for "O Tannenbaum" sound like something LeBeau would come up with, and the part about them going into circulation was also amusing. The explosive gift idea was something new, but it fits into the series/story well.
12/22/2020 c1 3DeathThouShaltDie
Nice to read a Christmas story! This was enjoyable and pretty light-hearted, and I like the idea behind the story. You chose a great title- it immediately caught my eye. You mention you struggled in the past writing Colonel Hogan, but I think you've done a great job here- his actions, thought processes, etc. felt right. I see you've written other Hogan's Heroes stories in the past, I'm looking forward to reading them!
12/21/2020 c1 28Abracadebra
First of all, I am SO glad to see you’ve returned! This is delightful, with some really clever turns of phrase (the security riding crop and the olfactory imagery of cologne for a guy who hasn’t showered in a week...) It’s a well paced romp with an inspired title. (I just love it when the title works so well.)
A beta or proofreader could have helped in a few places. For example, I have a feeling that either you’re conditioned to upper case He and Him and His after your time in the convent, or your keyboard is set to do that, but it’s not necessary.

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