1/20 c2 DragonWarriorPo
Hey baloo you worried about seeing kit less? Marry Rebecca problem solved. don’t worry big guy just because kit is becky’s son doesn’t stop him from being your best friend. The boy still needs a father after al...
Hey baloo you worried about seeing kit less? Marry Rebecca problem solved. don’t worry big guy just because kit is becky’s son doesn’t stop him from being your best friend. The boy still needs a father after al...
12/2/2020 c1 Guest
So kit is Molly’s brother
So kit is Molly’s brother
8/12/2020 c1 1Jaggeddruid
I like the concept. It needs further development in terms of character development and elaboration of their thoughts. What made Rebecca get the tests? How did she convince Kit to submit to them (as in a needle stick). How did Molly react? How did Baloo react and what were his feelings on this. Kit's school environment would also play a part in his no longer being an Orphan. The Jungle Aces could be brought into as well. Also, the vacation itself could be an entire part of the story. This story has so much untapped potential and you can do so much with it.
But a big on is this: The spelling and grammar editing is a must.
I like the concept. It needs further development in terms of character development and elaboration of their thoughts. What made Rebecca get the tests? How did she convince Kit to submit to them (as in a needle stick). How did Molly react? How did Baloo react and what were his feelings on this. Kit's school environment would also play a part in his no longer being an Orphan. The Jungle Aces could be brought into as well. Also, the vacation itself could be an entire part of the story. This story has so much untapped potential and you can do so much with it.
But a big on is this: The spelling and grammar editing is a must.
1/7/2020 c1 Jennie
Very nice story. Needs some spelling and punctuation corrections which I can help you with. I enjoyed this story.
Very nice story. Needs some spelling and punctuation corrections which I can help you with. I enjoyed this story.