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for Robotech: Sidesteps

7/19 c1 Louga
Reddit reporting for duty! Ewmiselle here.
Don't know a single thing about the fandom, but never fear, present tense narration is my jam, so I already feel at home here!
I like how the exposition part, when Jeremy rants with no one there to hear, doesn't really feel like the exposition - it feels natural,
and already tells me volumes on what kind of person he is. Kinda reminds me of Sam Vimes in a way. And his voice is so strong! Excellent nomenclature choices here, gave him a lot of character.

I wonder if you're a fan of westerns: you'd fit pretty well with the classics of the genre with your style. It's pretty pared-down, but has that plasticity
to it, making me not miss flowery descriptions. I've already mentioned that you sketched your protagonist nicely - I like Commander Hayes, too! Again,
you're sparse with your description, but her words and reactions are enough to give me the clear picture.
Since you're open to concrit, I wanted to mention too many dialogue tags, but the further I went, the sparser and more precise they became, so you clearly
managed the problem nicely on your own (also, I'm guilty of doing the same thing, so I'm not judging).
The action scene was very enjoyable, and your style only added to its dramatic nature.
4/27 c1 4Loveandfriendship
Hi! It's Oceanside136 from Reddit here to review your story!

So I will start off with that I'm not familiar at all with this fandom - hence why I only read this first chapter.

But I will say that chapter flows very well and the action scenes are some of the better ones I've seen. The only thing that I found that took me out of the story was going back and forth between Jeremy and Daniels. I had to reread it a couple of times to make sure that it was the same person.

Also, I have to mention, the beginning paragraph where he was muttering to himself was so relatable! I don't know how many times I've done that!

Good job and I hope your story continues to grow!
2/26 c2 Alyssa111
This chapter was really interesting! I like Sergeant Quail a lot.
Great job, this story is amazing.
2/26 c1 Rillice
Your writing flows really well and I liked how you wrote the action sequence, not too slow and not rushed, with enough description so that we can understand what's going on. This sounds like a great start for a great fic!
12/21/2020 c7 36calarinanis
I'm dying right now because Jeremy as a baker must have been a sight to be seen! It's such a wonderful addition to his character and I loved his conversation with Janet because it made me laugh so much! I just want to say that you have a fabulous style of prose, it's so descriptive and visual that I can imagine everything as it's happening plus your military knowledge is such a bonus! Thanks for writing!
12/21/2020 c6 calarinanis
Love that Jeremy got all awkward when it turned out that he had a fan! It was a lovely moment of levity with Claudia and Roy teasing him that worked perfectly to add a little slice of lightheartedness in this chapter. I think you've got the pacing spot on!
12/21/2020 c5 calarinanis
Oh I'm so glad that Jason's family is okay! I was so worried that he might turn up to find them injured or even dead so I'm so happy to see that they've survived. The battle scene in this one was brilliant, it was full of tension and I was reading with dread expecting something bad to happen. I've got to say that Jeremy is on it all the time, his actions made the difference.
12/21/2020 c4 calarinanis
Fantastic! I love the growing relationship between Jason and Jeremy especially the fact that Jason seems to trust Jeremy to the point that he stood up for him. I'm also liking the way you weave in bits of Jeremy's past in this chapter, it's starting to come together for me. The last sentence also feels like the perfect end to this chapter!
12/21/2020 c3 calarinanis
Yay for Janet being sweet on Jeremy! I'm so glad that my guess has proved true especially since I think Jeremy will need all the help he can get in the coming chapters. Your use of military terminology is spot on and I think accurately captures what it would be like in this sort of situation. I'm also loving the dynamic between Jason and Jeremy!
12/21/2020 c2 calarinanis
Oh I'm starting to like Janet, I'm hoping that she'll be a potential ally of a kind for Jeremy given that she seems to be relatively reasonable. I also think Jeremy's dream was a clever way to show the kind of experience he's had prior to his coming here. You've got real skill in depicting the action scenes, they feel so plausible!
12/21/2020 c1 calarinanis
Ooh what a fantastic start to your story! I'm loving Jeremy's character already and I think you've given him such a distinct voice that despite being fandom blind I'm sure I can hear him in my head. You've also got such a knack for weaving details throughout the chapter without it being overbearing.
11/29/2020 c7 70Tower of Babel
It reads well. Some areas need proofreading especially with narrative expression and some punctuation just before speech. I notice you write in the third person. The only way I can describe how I pictures things was a SIM game, where I followed the character around as "Jeremy" did things. I enjoy the Robotech series and I'm a fan of the series, the original 80s version. Good job!
10/19/2020 c1 6DoubleM7
I went in to this fic blind, I see that you put in alot of work in what you did. Great settup, introduction to the players of your story.
Thank you, greeting from reddit.
10/2/2020 c7 7cliff.west
nice work. looking forward to more
9/27/2020 c7 11Thomas Drovin
Hey there welcome back to your lovely, lovely story at long, long, LONG last! Its hard to believe that its been almost a year and a half since you last updated! With all the craziness going on in the world outside this site I can't blame you for your absence, its getting almost as hectic as Robotech! Anyway Jeremy has an interesting way of how he spends his R&R its real amusing, I loved how he threw in the Avatar remark and NONE of them knew what he was on about! *Chuckles* See you next update whenever you can manage it so I can see what happens next! Good Health, Clear Body, Strong Mind!
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