Just In
Community
Forum
More
for Even a Stray has Pride

5/22/2020 c11 1ZarduHasselfrau
Hey it's Kazz here

Once again, I absolutely adore the way you write Gabranth. His internal conflict shines through in your writing. Your world building is great too, I can totally picture everything you say so clearly. I like the addition of the Viera again, she seems cool :)

Can't wait for more!
1/2/2020 c1 12211101
I have just finished chapter 7 and it might be my favorite so far! Really felt bad about the talk boys had with their mom about Naria, but as the story progressed it really grew on me. Can't wait to see where the story goes in next chapters!
12/2/2019 c3 Thiccler
This chapter was so nice to read, love how sweet Naria is and how she brings Noah to dance with her, despite him thinking his brother Basch is better.

Also fu** Basch.
7/13/2017 c6 5Ellastasia
Oh my gosh! I really didn't see that coming. I feel so bad for their mother, what a horrible tragedy. I wonder who will step up to take his place? You captured her distress very well, and everyone's personalities are so alive. I also like the little historical tidbits you've put in there, especially the Kiltias report!
7/11/2017 c4 Ellastasia
So many things happening here! Their mother's apologies and confession about her love for her sons is beautiful. And I'm so glad that their father is nearby, though I thought Noah would be the one to want to go to him. I like the unexpected chance for him to study law instead, that makes perfect sense. Great chapter!
7/10/2017 c2 Ellastasia
I absolutely love the innocence of the characters, and especially Nariah. She is such a strong character already! You've successfully transported back into the FFXII world, and your portrayal of young Basch is interesting - but not wholly unexpected. He is rather a hero in his own right, so it's only fitting he starts off as an arrogant youth. But Gabranth always won me over from the start. Excited to read the next chapter!
9/30/2016 c10 Franck
Wow, what a chapter! I really don't know what to do because I didn't expected that much violence coming from this story! But after all FF12 is also about WAR and war ain't pretty...so it is also important to show that side of the story, even if it's horrible to read all the pain that Noah has to go through to fulfill his destiny.

The only "bémol" I would put on it is the "deus ex machina" when Noah randomly finds a person that says where Basch is going. I thought it a little easy cuz' we don't know who is this person and why this person would reveal these informations to Noah. But otherwise it was an intense chapter that ends perfectly the first part on a crepuscular note and I really want to discover what will happen to Noah in the next part. Meanwhile...
.
.
.
"No hope, no life, just pain and fear
No food, no love, no seed, CHILDHOOD'S END!"
9/23/2016 c10 Kazz
Wow. Wow, wow wow.

I LOVED this chapter. Intense and emotional but seriously, wow.

I'll let you know my in depth thoughts tomorrow, but I have nothing bad to say about this!

Can't wait for more!
5/1/2016 c9 Guest
It was a less tumultuous chapter than the previous ones but it's good to have from time to time more "peaceful" parts. I liked the "reveries" of Noah & Naria near the forest. The fact that Naria loves both of the brothers would have drove me mad if I was Noah tho'...xD

And even if it's less "tumultuous" a lot of things happen and the siblings & Naria really tend to become little men/woman. For now, like Noah said everything is under control but I have the feeling that all they know will soon brutally change forever. So this chapter seems like a sort of transition to these dark times. Even the reaction of Cirla surprised me, I thought that he would be devastated by his agression but for now, it's still time for happy moments.

To finish, in terms of lenght, it's good to alternate with shorter chapters like this comparing to the previous one which was huge, even tho it brought a lot of development to the story.
3/20/2016 c8 Franck
The very anticipated new chapter of Noah's story is out! Hurray! It has been a pleasure to read it, even if it was slightly longer than the previous ones. I was kinda surprised because I didn't have to search for so many words to translate compared to the others chapter (regardiing the lenght of the chapter). So I have the feeling that you made efforts in the style, so it was pleasant and fluid to read.

The narrated parts bring some variety to the ensemble. Retrospectively, I find that the others chapters had too much dialogue compared to the narrative parts (but I remarked that a change was operating on the previous chapter "The Shard) and I personally liked this move as I already told you. So I hope that for the future, the balance between narratives & dialogues will reach a new balance, I know that you find it more easy to write dialogue, and they are fine (as always the brother & sister pickings are funny :D) but it's also good to go out of your confort that your confort zone & try new things, that's you did here & I encourage you in this way! (I'm not telling you to change your style, who am I to do such thing! But variety brings for sure more opportunities to develop your story I guess)

Concerning the thematics & developpement of the story, it's the continuation of what was developped in previous chapters (political tensions, social issues, especially illiteracy, I guess you brought this here from what certains people experience this, in particular in your country, as far as I know, this is a major concern in your land, & in a more personal way, I think it's the worst thing in the world for you, like a curse regarding your passion for writing :) )

Noah has proven again his value, and we can guess that this very experience will be crucial for what he will decide to do with his life! I found Basch very unpleasant as always because I dont't like egoish people and I find my personality way closer to Noah's one. Naria remains true to herself, full of energy & good will.

The ending suggests us a regain of tensions between the people of Landis & Archadia so I guess that the fall of Landis will occur sooner & later. I just wonder how it will happen!
3/6/2016 c1 21sayuri-geisha
I think I'll have difficult to remember all details of Gabranth's story xD (and of his brother!) But, the first chapter is a good resume of childhood, and I liked it!
Basch is a true Gary-stu; great, smart, nice, perfect! Poor Gabranth!

Do you kwow that I totally forgot the real name of Gabranth xD? Noah! I have to play again of FF XII, really!
11/23/2015 c7 Franck
Sorry for the "double-post" but I forgot to mention that I really liked the relationship between Noah's mom and Naria, I was moved when she decided to help and almost raise Naria as if she was her daughter, I think she perfectly understand the pain of Naria since she also lost a beloved soul, and the profound humanity of this helping hand touched me.

Oh, and poor Mog, never taken seriously :( , I laughed when the poor creature tried to keep his serious over the embarassing situation :D
11/23/2015 c7 Franck
Review for both Chap. 6 & 7 since they were a bit shorter than the previous ones:

I think I kinda lack of informations on the lore & background of FF12 to fully appreciate these chapters (some characters I dont know at all "appear" here: the Empress, Bur-Omisace, the Kiltianists, the Judge Zecht)...

However, I really liked the part when Cirla and the others came to announce the terrible news to Noah and co. I was listening to this music while reading this moment ( watch?vjR0hjmLskDg) , the title of it is Nachklang which means "Echo" or "memories" in german, and I found the music so appropriate to the moment Cirla began to sing, it was a weird experience, but it fitted so well to the scene I don't know why. I can perfectly imagine in my head all this crowd well dressed with flowers in their hands and with this music resounding in these moments of grief.

In the last chapter, I was pleased by all the little details you brought in order to describe the atmosphere of Nabreus and particullary the painting scenes (since I'm found of painting, I think I would have been very pleased to listen to Hrina speach :D).

I found it brought some consistance to the background, knowing the prominent citizens of Nabradia and Landis makes me feel that it's a very living world, with all its important characters having very important occupation :D (the Treaty of free movement of goods between Landis and Nabradia made me smile cause I studied for all a semester Law of free movements of goods in the EU :D)

In the end I'm really intrigued about the end of the chapter since I really don't know where these elections will lead us. It's maybe the only little "bemol" I can bring here, I really don't know what it means in terms of stakes, it's kinda weird to finish a Part of the story like that, so I imagine it will be a central element of the 2nd part.

Overall, I really liked this first part and it was always a pleasure to read it all those nights before going to bed (it's like a little ritual :D). I really hope you will keep going on this way, and I can't wait to read the 2nd part!
11/9/2015 c5 Franck
A more oriented-dialogue part. I found they were well-writtened and funny for the most part! Naria is a hell of a seller but not not a so good accountant. We can discover a more confident and talented Noah as he discovers he is perfectly capable of running a business. Heh, it's not by accident he will become an implacable judge! The end of the part is also interesting as it brings more stakes for the story, and we can easily imagine that Margit's predictions turn out to be true in a near future...An other interesting thing addressed here is the more sociological issue of mixed marriages that can be easily transposed to our societies (interfaith/interethnic mariages, the acceptation of it by the family and the society in general...).

So in conclusion of this part:
-funny situations served by well-writtened dialogues
-the reals stakes are slowly emerging behind "a priori" very anodine questions
-societal questions that directly question our actual societies

I am eager to discover what will happen next!
10/27/2015 c4 Franck
This chapter was a bit long but very intersting. I was amused when noah thought that sharing a bedroom for brothers & sister was uncommon cuz i share my bedroom with my sister for 14 years :D It was also fun seeing the 3 characters being so enthusiastic studyin law because i studied law for 4 years and its not always "funny " :D The "twist"at the end wa kinda unexpcted and I wonder what will happen to Basch and what Noah will learn in law class! (I guess his destiny as a judge will slowly emerge from these events...)
34 Page 1 .. Last Next »

Twitter . Help . Sign Up . Cookies . Privacy . Terms of Service