Hey! Heres my very, very, looong one shot. It should actually probably be a chapter story, but I'm too lazy to do so. I know this has been done before (and it is a very wonderful story and everyone should read it), but I swear this will be different. You see flashbacks and it has more delusional parts in it. Plus it is way longer. So yeah! Don't flame me and accuse me for taking someone else's idea. If the author of that amazing story has a problem with this, we can PM each other and work something out. The beginning might be a little bit similar, but I really tried to make it as different as possible. I really did. So yeah, have fun reading. And if you guys want, I can break this up into chapters. So yep! Hope you enjoy it!

Phoney was drudging behind everybody. It was pouring rain, he felt sleepy and tired, and everybody in the group at some level wanted to kill him. He slipped in the mud, and somebody told him to watch it. He didn't know who, and he didn't care. Usually he would bite back with some clever remark, but the only thing his energy allowed him to say was an apology.

Everybody seemed to notice Phoney's condition except Euclid. Euclid was mad at everybody, putting the blame on everybody else but himself. He was mad at Thorn for abandoning them, he was mad at Gran'ma Ben for (according to Thorn) lying to everybody about her identity, he was mad at Lucius for disappearing and not coming back, he was mad at Phoney for leading everybody out of the village and leaving it defenseless, and he was mad at Wendell for defending the little runt.

And, most of all, he was mad at that Phoney Bone.

"We'll never find Old Man's Cave this way. I just can't believe Thorn would do this," Wendell sighed.

"Well, believe it. She slipped of in th' middle of the nigh without sayin' a word, an' now we're wanderin' around out here blind!" said Euclid.

"Thorn could've found her way through this rain. She could find her way in th' darkest night like she was following a map." Stated Jonathan.

"Yes she could," agreed Wendell. "It's uncanny."

"She follows the dragons in the Earth. Just like th' dragon told her."

Euclid humfed. "Yeah, well, she's followin' the dragons somewhere else! Forget her! We got problems of our own-"

Splosh!

"HEY! That's it! I'VE HAD IT!"

Euclid grabbed that little pain in the butt by them shirt and lifted him up, but Wendell tried to stop him.

"Euclid! Save it for later! There could be rat creatures twenty feet away for all we know!"

"Where's yer little princess now? Huh, Bone? She's not here to save ya!"

"Put him down, Euclid!"

"Stay back! I've had it with this troublemaker! THIS IS ALL HIS FAULT!"

"All right, that's enough. I don't know where Thorn is, but until I come back, I'm enforcing her orders!" Wendell pushed Euclid, making him drop Phoney.

"You're a fool, Wendell! She ran out on us last night! What do you care what she wants?!"

"I care because she's a Harvestar!"

"The Harvestars were wiped out fifteen years ago when Athena was sacked! Theres nobody alive with that name!" Euclid pushed back his friend, nearly toppling him over.

"There've been rumors for years that the little girl survived the massacre-"

"Yeah, I know, an' Ol' Gran'ma Ben is th' Lost Queen of th' Valley!" They were both on the ground at this point, rolling in the mud and rain. Just when it was about to escalate to fists, a new voice spoke up.

"HALT!"

"Who's there?" asked Wendell.

"There's a war on, gentlemen. Control yourselves… Or I'll pick you both up and knock some sense into you."

The figure lifted up her hood, revealing her face. "Gran'ma Ben-!" Wendell gasped. Euclid widened his eyes in fear.

"Where's my granddaughter? Where's Thorn?"

"She was with us last night, but we got up this morning, and she was gone."

The figure behind Gran'ma Ben revealed himself. "I'll find her."

"Lucius!" shouted Jon, "You're alive!"

Lucius rushed off into the woods, leaving Jonathan grinning from ear to ear. Gran'ma spared one last glace at his direction before speaking. "Come with me. We're near the cave now, and you can dry off-"

"Th- that's amazing," Phoney said in awe, staring where Lucius disappeared. "Lucius took off after Thorn without a second thought about his own safety."

"That's right. He's a very remarkable man. I'm surprised you noticed, Phoncible." Ggran'ma Ben looked at Phoney, and saw him shiver. "Come, it's not safe out here, you'll catch your death."

On the way back to the cave, Phoney's condition got worse and worse. He kept tripping and falling, and each time it was getting harder and harder for him to get up. Gran'ma Ben kept seeing him shiver and almost fall asleep while walking. Every once in a while, he would stutter incoherent words, then he would shake himself to reality again. Every time anybody tried to help him. He would brush them off, saying he didn't need help. Then, Phoney slipped into a puddle, and didn't get back up. Gran'ma bent over and tried to shake him awake. "Phoncible? Phoncible? Wake up, Phoney."

Phoney didn't respond.

Gran'ma Ben picked him up. "We need to move fast. We have to get Phoncible to a healer right away."

"Why should we help the little runt? All he did was cause us trouble," muttered Euclid.

Gran'ma turned on him, "We're going to help him because we need to stick together in order to win th' war. And, whether we like it or not, Phoney's one of us now. We need him as much as we need you, so I don't wanna hear a thing about leaving Phoney to die, otherwise I'll whop you so hard your grandchildren will have a bump! Understand?" Euclid nodded quickly, "Good, let's move."

They move swiftly through he the woods, and when they got to the cave, Gran'ma immediately asked for a healer. They laid him down onto the ground and the healer inspected him.

"To be honest, my queen, I have no idea what is wrong with him. It could be anything from the common cold to something much more drastic. I can't know until later on. Whatever he has, it is in the earliest stages. The only thing he has is a fever. Until then, keep this cool cloth on his forehead and make sure he warms up. If anything changes, contact me." The healer walked off to other patients, and Gran'ma was watching Phoney. He was thrashing in his sleep, shivering while the rest of his body burned up. Sweat beaded his forehead. Ben dabbed the cloth on his head, concerned about the tiny bone.

Meanwhile, Phoney was dreaming in his sleep. And it wasn't pleasant.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

Phoncible P. Bone: Wealthy, smart, the Richest Bone in Boneville, descendent of Big Johnson Bone, cousin of Fone Bone and Smiley Bone, owner of 4 orphanages, 3 petting zoos, 1 school, 2 landfills, 17 successful companies and 4 unsuccessful, 6 ranches, 2 bakeries, 5 slaughter houses, and 1 bad prune garden. Phoncible P. Bone, was once a nobody.

1 nobody, taking care of 2 other orphans.

On the streets.

Alone.

All three of them were orphaned at the Gas Incident, along with one-hundred and seventy-two other children. Some of the children were lucky. They had aunts and uncles or grandparents willing to take them in. Not Phoney. Nobody wanted Phoney.

The three of them were staying at their Aunt's house when they heard the explosion. Against their Aunt's wishes, the three cousins ran toward the chaos, looking for their parents.

But they were nowhere to be found.

The police went to their Aunt's doorstep. She was a stuck up woman, and cared very little for children. She scoffed when they were around and covered everything with plastic when the cousins came over. She would usually make the Bone cousins sit in chairs for hours with nothing to do while she chatted on the phone, afraid they will steal something while her back was turned.

But when the police came with the cousins and explained the situation, for a moment she looked like she would actually accept them into her custody. She looked at each one of them. Then she saw Phoney.

And she flat out refused.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

Phoney's condition was getting worse. His fever kept getting higher and higher, but still he shivered. He started yelling out in his sleep, and once or twice he vomited.

Gran'ma Ben didn't think it could possibly get worse. But it did when he woke up.

Phoney sat straight up in his bed and screamed, eyes wide with terror. Gran'ma Ben and a few others woke up as well. They all looked at Phoney. "Wh- where are they?" he stuttered.

"Where are who, Phoncible?" asked Gran'ma as calmly as she could.

"Where are m-my cousins?" he looked like he was about to cry, "Where did you take 'em?"

"We didn't take them any-"

"WHERE ARE THEY?"

Gran'ma looked wildly about. "Healer? Where's the healer? Jonathan, get th' healer."

"Where did you put them?"

"Phoncible, it's me, don't you remember? It's Gran'ma Ben."

"Gr- Grandma?"

"Yes," she was relieved for him to remember something.

"Nononononononono," Phoney shook his head wildly, "You're dead. You died with M-Mom an' D-D-Dad."

"What are you talking about? I'm right here…"

"No you're not!" he wailed, "Where's Fone Bone and Smiley?"

Jonathan came running back with the healer. "I got him, Gran'ma! I got him!"

Phoney looked around wildly. "Where are they?"

"Your majesty, what happened to him?" asked the healer.

"I don't know. He woke up and he doesn't seem to realize where he is or who I am."

The healer felt his temperature. "I think he is delusional. This is much worse than I thought."

"Where did you put them?" Phoncible grasped the healer's sleeve, "I promised them we'll stay together!"

"Here, give him these," the healer gave Gran'ma some herbs, "And try to calm him down."

The healer walked away and Gran'ma turned to Phoney. He looked scared to death.

"Here, Phoney, you must eat this."

"Not until you say where Smiley and Fone are!"

"Ssh, ssh. It's alright. They're just outside. They wanted fresh air. They'll be back soon, but they wanted me to give you this to eat."

"D-Did they eat already?"

"Yes dear."

Reluctantly, Phoney ate the herbs. After he was done with that, she gave him some soup and water. "Are you sure they ate? They need food more than I d-do."

"I'm sure."

Phoney nodded and said he didn't want anymore.

"Will they be back soon?" Phoney asked.

"Very soon. But for now, just get some rest."

Phoney nodded and laid down. Gran'ma leaned back and raked her fingers threw her hair while she tried to make sense of what Phoncible said.

He said that Gran'ma died with his parents. So that probably meant that Phoncible's parents are dead. He also talked about Fone Bone and Smiley like someone was trying to take them away. Gran'ma didn't know exactly what Phoncible's mind was doing, but she thought it was probably set sometime in the past. She never saw Phoney act this way. It was like talking to a stranger. Or maybe a lost child.

Either way, she didn't like it.

Not one bit.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

After the cousins' parents died, they were sent to orphanage after orphanage. Phoney was the oldest of the three, and he took full responsibility of them. He did everything in his power to keep them together, from lying to blackmailing. Phoncible promised his cousins that he would keep them together. And he took that very seriously.

With the big wave of orphans coming in, it was hard. There was hardly enough food and space for thirty orphans in a normal orphanage, much less sixty. Some of them thought they would be better off on their own in the streets, so they left.

Phoncible tried his best to keep his cousins in the orphanage. Though it did little, it provided food, shelter, and somewhat of an education. Hunger and cold nights, they could handle. It was lawyers and bullies that got to them. The bullies took a special liking to Smiley, and sometimes he would come back after missing all day with a black eye or a cut lip. Phoncible did his best to protect Smiley, but he couldn't be with him every second of the day.

Lawyers were a different problem. They took children at random times to different locations, without warning. Sometimes they took children to different orphanages or foster homes. Other times they bring them to a relative. Though they sounded nice, they were mean. Some kids went to sleep next to their brother or sister to find the next day they were gone. The lawyers did this all legally of course, and in their mind they were helping the kids. But it didn't hurt to make a few bucks off it either.

Phoncible was scared of lawyers. His worst fear was falling asleep and never seeing his cousins again. And when that did happen, he looked all over the city for them. He gave away all his belongings for information, and finally found Smiley three days later in an orphanage in the downtown area. He got to Fone a week later in some foster house. After that, they agreed to find their own place to live.

After a month of searching, they finally found a perfect place near towns square. In between to old boarded up buildings was a rain gutter that they climb up. Then they walk along roofs of houses until they come across an old factory with a hole in the roof. Then you drop in and walk to the boiling room, where you find a half decent place to live, if you had low standards.

They didn't have much to call their own other than the clothes on their backs. Phoney wore a vest, Fone Bone wore a blue turtleneck sweater with patches at the elbows, and Smiley just wore overalls.

They didn't have any schooling except what they already knew. Sometimes they snuck into school classes and listened in to the teaching. Fone Bone was a natural reader, so he tried to teach Phoney and Smiley what he knew. Phoncible had a natural ability for math, though he didn't know much, he stole math books and had Fone Bone read it to them. Smiley was just Smiley, though he did liked art and music.

Everything was going semi-well for the orphans. But it is always calm before the storm.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

Phoncible zoned off and on. While he was awake he usually vomited or ate. He had terrible diarrhea and he was constantly shivering.

"Don't understand why we feed him if he just goes out th' other end. We're on a food shortage an' he's wasting completely good food."

Gran'ma ignored Euclid and changed the blankets Phoney was laying in. She was very concerned about the Bone. He had grown remarkably thin the last few days and (if possible) paler. His fever kept escalating. Gran'ma was surprised that Phoncible survived this long. He hadn't had any more of his fits for the past few days, and she was expecting that it would happen again soon.

It looked like the powers that be was reading her mind, because at that moment Phoney woke up. "What are you doing here?" he asked. Phoney sounded angry. He sat up. "I thought I told you to stay away!"

"Phoney, it's me. Gran'ma Ben."

"Why did you come here? I told you I don't have any money."

Gran'ma sighed and shared a desperate glance at the others. They shrugged, indicating they had no idea what to do. "Phoncible, I don't want your money. I'm trying to help you."

"Why would believe you? You just want money. I told you, I don't have any money."

Jonathan spoke up, "Phoney, we aren't tryin' to hurt you. We're trying to make you feel better."

"Who told you that?" Phoncible seemed to be mixing up everybody's words up to fit his state of mind.

"Errr," Jonathan looked around desperately, unsure how to answer in a way that would get the little Bone to calm down, "Smiley and Fone Bone did! They told us to help you."

Phoncible all the sudden seemed scared. "Y-you stay away from my cousins."

"You runt! We're not threatening your stupid cousins-"

Gran'ma interrupted Euclid. "Phoncible you need rest. Go back to sleep." She waved some herbs underneath his nose and he slumped forward, fast asleep.

"That idiot. Wonder what's going on in his head?" Wendell wondered.

"I don't know, Wendell. I just don't know…"

O.o.O.o.O

Phoncible was walking back to the factory while kicking a rock down the sidewalk. He turned around the corner and ran straight into the local gang.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Phoncible. We were just talking about you."

Phoney backed away only to run into more guys behind him. He was trapped. "I thought I told you guys to stay away."

"We came back," the leader shrugged. His name was Tony Brawn-Bone. He was extra tall and very wiry, and carried a switchblade with him wherever he went. "I hope you have that money for us."

"I already told you, I don't have no money."

"That's a shame. It would be sad if you went to your little factory one night and found one of your cousins gravely injured." Tony pulled out a switchblade and clean his nails, "You really need to be more careful when you travel home. Anybody could follow you to see where you live. It's really quite dangerous."

"Y-you leave my cousins alone!"

"Then get the money."

Phoney stared at Tony for a few seconds, he stared back. Phoney finally dropped his gaze, "Fine. But I need time."

"You have one week to get the money. If you don't…" Tony let the unspoken threat linger in the air. He snapped his fingers and turned around. The rest of the group followed his lead and slinked off into the shadows.

Phoncible leaned back and raked his fingers through his non-existent hair. "What am I going to tell Fone Bone?"

O.o.O.o.O

Phoney's illusions were coming more often, but he puked less, which was a good sign. Gran'ma didn't like it when Phoncible had his fits. She felt like she was invading in his personal stuff. She saw a whole new light in Phoney. Instead of the normal, selfish Phoney she saw a caring, overprotective Phoney. He talked often of his cousins during his fits, and he sometimes talked like they were right beside him. He didn't have a single fit all day that day, and then, right before sundown, it happened.

"What time is it?" Phoncible was eating just a few moments ago, now he was in 'his world', as Wendell called it.

"It's just before sundown," muttered Euclid, not aware what was happening.

"Are my cousins asleep yet?"

Euclid looked up, wide eyed. He now realized what was happening, and he tried on a friendly smile, which did not fit him at all, "Yes, they went to bed just a few moments ago." Euclid became less harsh toward Phoncible over the past few days. Euclid (though he denied it) felt bad for Phoney, and tried his best to calm him down when he could.

"I gotta' go." Phoncible crawled out of blankets and tried to stand up, only to collapse in a heap.

"Where do you need to go?" asked Jonathon.

"I need to get to work."

"Calm down, Phoncible. You can't work in the night…" Gran'ma started.

"No. I need to get th' money. Fone Bone can't know. Smiley can't know. I need to get the money…" he struggled to get up, only to end in a coughing fit.

"Phoncible," her voice was stern now, "You can't go. You're sick!"

Phoney looked up, surprised. Then he shook his head. "No. I can't be sick. I hafta' work to get th' money. I can't be sick. If I don't get the money, they're gonna' get hurt real bad."

"No they won't."

"Yes they will. He's gonna' hurt them. He knows where I live. I can't be sick. He's gonna' hurt 'em…"

Gran'ma shook her head sadly, "Phoncible, lay down. I'll get th' money."

"You will?" he asked hesitantly.

"I will," Gran'ma assured.

He rested back down in his blankets, eyes half closed. "Thank you, Fone Bone."

Phoncible fell asleep almost instantly. Gran'ma and Jon sighed in relief. "I feel bad for him. I really do. He must have gone through somethin' intense in his life for him to be saying that stuff."

Gran'ma looked at Jonathon, her eyes tired from late nights and worry. "I think you're right."

O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O

Phoney never did tell Fone Bone. Or anybody else.

Phoncible went around with his cousins all day, taking full responsibility for them. He stole pies and food from shops, and when his cousins weren't looking, money. Fone carried that book his dad gave to him everywhere. In Phoney's opinion, he was much too young for that crummy Moby Dick book, but Fone wouldn't hear of it. Fone Bone worked a few odd jobs every once in a while to get money for more books. He got Gulliver's Travels and 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, along with other books Phoney couldn't remember. Smiley saved up enough money for a banjo, though Phoney complained to no end that they should have used it on food.

After all day of stealing, fighting, and running, they finally went back home to the boiling room, completely exhausted. It wasn't long before Phoney's cousins fell to sleep, and as soon as they did he snuck out. Phoney was completely exhausted too, but he had a job to do. Literally.

Phoncible finally found the perfect place that A) he didn't rob from B) had no regard to the law and C) who would accept him: the bar.

Phoney spent all night cleaning the dishes and scrubbing the floors with a much to low pay. But Phoney didn't know that. He was very new to the business world, and money was money. And Phoney needed it.

After the long night, it would take him about an hour on foot to get home. Once home, he would get about four hours of sleep, tops, then he would wake up and start the whole day over again.

"You don't look so good Phoney. Are you all right?"

"I'm fine," Phoney snapped, "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well," Fone Bone started, "you have been really sleepy th' past few weeks. Are you sure you're gettin' you're sleep?"

"What? Haven't you been seein' me go to sleep with ya' every night? Don't I get up with ya' every mornin'?"

"Yes…"

"Then why are you sayin' that stuff?"

"Fone Bone's right, Phoney. I don't know much, but I know you're tired all th' time," Smiley said with his usual smile.

"I know, right? And he looks sick all th' time too-"

"SHUT UP!" Phoney screamed. Smiley and Phoney jumped at the sudden outburst. "I'm fine, okay!? So stop talking about it!"

Phoney turned around and continued forward to Mr. Bread-Bone's bakery.

Smiley leaned toward Fone Bone and whispered, "I think being tired makes you grumpy too." Fone Bone nodded in agreement and the two cousins ran to catch up to Phoney.

Phoney did feel sick, that was true, but he didn't show it. He needed to stay strong for his insolent cousins. Once he rounded a corner and he was out of sight, he doubled over and threw up. After a few gasps of air, he forced himself to get up, cover up the mess, and continue like nothing happened.

He reached the bakery, and his cousins finally caught up with him. "Okay, here's th' plan: Smiley will make a distraction up in front, and Fone Bone and I will sneak through th' back and grab whatever we can. Once you see us leaving, Smiley, get out of there as fast. Okay?"

Smiley nodded and clomped his way into the store, "Here I am acting all casual-like! What you makin', Baker?"

Phoney slapped his forehead. "Ooh! C'mon Fone Bone! That idiot won't hold them for long!" Phoney heard a few crashes and a scream.

"Oopsy, silly me. Sorry for accidently pushing you into a cake! Here, let me help you, madam… Oops! I slipped and in the process I brought down a whole rack of displays!"

Phoney growled, "Can he not be more obvious?"

Fone Bone looked back at the door, "At least it's working."

They ran to the back and slipped inside through the window. The room was filled with supplies, from bread to eggs to apples and oranges.

Beautiful.

Fone and Phoney stuffed their pockets with supplies and headed out. They ran outside. They heard Smiley join them. He was covered in sugar and frosting, but he had a huge smile on his face. "That was fun!"

They rounded a corner and heard sirens up ahead. "Uh oh," Fone muttered.

"We just need to get to the rain gutter, then we'll be scot free."

They reached the rain gutter. Smiley went up first, then Fone Bone. Phoncible stared up the gutter. He really didn't want to climb that.

He heard the police sirens getting closer behind him. He had to hurry. "What are you waitin' for, Phoney? Climb up!"

Phoney heard this and started climbing, his arms full of stuff. He was halfway up when a wave of nausea took him over. He lost his grip and slipped. He fell down, landing flat on his back, groaning.

"Phoney!" cried Smiley.

"There he is! That's the kid! Get 'em!"

Phoncible scrambled to his feet. Phoney started to climb up again when someone grabbed his foot. "Yer' not goin' anywhere."

In desperation, Phoney threw his stuff at the policeman. He let go of Phoncible's foot and he scrambed up. Phoncible never climbed so fast in his life.

Once at the top, the three cousins ran for the factory, not looking back once. They didn't stop until they reached their room and shut the door. Phoney fell to the ground, wheezing.

"What was that?" asked Fone Bone angrily, "What was that!? Why didn't you climb up? They could have got you!"

Phoncible didn't respond. He was still gasping breaths of air.

"They almost got ya', Phoney! Why didn't you climb, Phoney? Why did you fall? You never fall!"

Smiley was sitting in the corner, watching Phoney with concern. "Stop it! I think he's sick."

"Well, it's his fault!" Fone Bone screamed. Phoncible looked up in surprise. "Yeah, that's right. You don't think I see ya' sneak out at night? I didn't say anything because I thought you had a good reason. Then I followed ya', and I saw you go into th' bar!"

Phoney spoke for the first time. "How did you-"

"Doesn't matter. Why you drinkin', Phoney? What, just because our moms and dads are gone means you can do whatever you want? You're gettin' sick and you almost got caught today because of it! Don't you think we care, Phoney? Huh? Do ya'?"

Smiley was sitting in shocked silence. "You drink, Phoney?" he asked in a small voice.

Phoney tried to speak, but instead he threw up. Fone Bone stepped back, disgusted. "Get out of here."

Those words struck Phoney hard. He tried to explain, "I didn't-"

"GET OUT!" Fone Bone pushed Phoncible toward the door. Something inside Phoney snapped.

"Fine! If you don't even let me explain, then fine! I'll go! Let's see how good you guys do without me." Phoney walked out the door and slammed it shut, rattling the widows. It started to rain outside.

Fone Bone sat there, seething with rage. "Good riddance."

Smiley kept staring at the door. "He's sick… outside… in the rain."

"So?" Fone snapped, "Why would you care? He's probably goin' to the bartenders right now, gettin' a drink to warm him up."

"We didn't even give him a chance to explain…"

"Why do you care so much? He's always callin' you names and giving you a hard time. Why do care about him?"

"I care because he's our cousin."

That sentence came out so blunt, so plain, it struck Fone Bone right in the center. Which is why he hated himself for the words that came next. "Not anymore." Fone Bone went to his sorry excuse for a bed and laid down, pretending to be asleep. Smiley, after a moment's hesitation, did the same. They both cried themselves to sleep that night.

Phoney, meanwhile, was storming through the rain, seething with anger and hurt. "That insolent, miserable, no-good, selfish, Bone!" he muttered. "I work my butt off for him and this is how he thanks me?"

Phoney was so angry he didn't even realize who was in front of him until he ran into them. "Hey! Watch it you little-" Then he saw who it was. Tony.

"There you are! We was lookin' all over for you, Phoney! How you been?" Tony said with false enthusiasm.

Phoney tried to laugh, "Who, me? I've been fine, really-"

"Okay, enough chit chat. Where's the money?"

Phoncible reached into his pocket and pulled out the wad of cash he earned over the past few weeks. Tony took it and counted. "What's this?"

"Money."

Tony punched him in the stomach. "This wouldn't buy you the core of an apple! Where's the rest?"

"That's all I have," he gasped. Tony punched him again.

"Phoney, you knew the price, now you have ta' pay."

"No, please!" all the anger from earlier washed out of him, "Hurt me instead! You can do anythin' you want, please! Just don't hurt my cousins!"

Tony considered him for a moment. "Since you asked nicely, we won't hurt 'em so much as to kill them. No, we'll just leave them with a reminder." And with that, one of his goons swung a crowbar and his vision went fuzzy. He was on the ground, wet and shivering, and slowly sank to darkness.

. . .

Phoney was awake when he heard the door open. He looked up hopefully, "Phoney?" but what he saw nearly scared him out of his wits.

Tony.

"W-what are y-you doin' here? I thought Ph-Phoney told you to st-stay away."

Smiley woke up and gasped. "Tony!"

"He told us to stay away, alright." He laughed, "Pl-please don't hurt my cousins! T-Take me instead!" he did a crude mock of Phoney's voice.

"Wh-What are you talkin' about?"

"Oh, you don't know? He didn't tell you? My, this is going to be so much funner."

Tony walked up to Fone Bone and punched him in the face. "Fone Bone!" Smiley cried. He reached for him but was held back by a few of Tony's goons.

"We watched him every night, go to the bar. He would work all night there, washing dishes and scrubbing floors." He kicked Fone Bone and he sailed across the room.

"What are you t-talking about? Phoney went to th' bar to drink." Phone Bone said as he tried to get up, regret and realization slowly settling into his stomach.

Tony ignored this question. "The bartender gave him unfair payment, but Phoney didn't know that. He worked all night and returned home only to get a few hours of sleep." Tony picked up a stray bottle and threw it at Fone Bone. He ducked and the glass shattered behind him.

"Why did he do this?" Smiley asked.

"He owed me. Told him if he didn't get th' money, I'd come after you," Tony shrugged, "Guess he didn't work hard enough." Tony swung but Fone Bone ducked and backed away, only to find himself in a corner.

"Where's Phoney?"

Tony shrugged again, "Last time I saw him he was out cold on the cement in th' rain."

"Oh no…" muttered Fone Bone.

Taking advantage of the shock, Tony swung, making full contact with his jaw. Fone Bone stumbled against the wall and Tony hit his stomach, knocking the air out of him. Fone leaned against the wall. Tony motioned for the rest of his goons. "Finish him." They swarmed the young Bone, armed with pipes and fists and crowbars, and started hitting. Fone Bone just curled up into a ball and tried to protect his head the best he could. Tony drew his knife and headed for Smiley, who was still constrained. "I promised to keep ya' alive," he said smiling, "but I also said I was going to leave a reminder."

Smiley gasped in horror at the realization of what was going to happen. "Uh oh," was all he could say.

. . .

Phoncible slowly came to. He woke up unable to remember anything, shivering horribly in the cold.

Then it hit him all at once. My cousins!

Phoney ran as fast as he could, only pausing twice to cough up phlegm and throw up. Once he reached the factory he jumped inside the roof and swung open the door, finding his Fone Bone alone and unconscious. He rushed to Fone Bone. "Gosh, Fone Bone. Wake up! Wake up right now!"

Fone Bone was covered in bruises and his skin was broken open in multiple places. His arm hung awkwardly to his side. Fone opened his eyes. "Fone Bone!" he cried happily.

"I'm so sorry… for what I said… earlier. I didn't know…"

"Stop talking. I forgive you. Where's Smiley?"

Fone Bone weakly held up his arm toward a dark corner in the room. There he saw Smiley. And he was bleeding a lot. Phoney ran over. "Smiley! Wake up! Wake up!" Smiley didn't wake up. His back was crisscrossed with gashes. Phoney didn't know how deep. He shook him. "Smiley, you idiot, wake up!"

He shook him for a few more seconds, with no avail. Phoney gathered the balnkets they used for beds and tried to stem the bleeding. "I'm going to get some help." He stood up and ran toward the door.

"NO!" screamed Fone Bone. Phoney looked at him, confused. "Please don't leave…" he cried.

Phoney didn't want to leave any more than Fone Bone. But Smiley's life was on the line. He gave his cousin a reassuring smile. "Don't worry. I'll be back. I'm just getting help." Before they could argue more he ran off, leaving his cousins alone. He ran all the way to the hospital and told them that his cousins were hurt. They rushed off in their vehicles and brought back his cousins. The next few hours was a blur. They separated the cousins and cared for each of them. Phoney was hysterical the whole time, trying to reach his cousins. But they restrained him. They told him that Smiley might not make it and that Fone Bone had a broken arm. They gave Phoney medicine for his sickness and allowed the cousins to sleep in the same room together.

Phoney and Fone Bone sat by Smiley's bed. Smiley was hooked up to machines and wires. His usual smile was gone and was replaced with a shell of his former self. He looked so lifeless, so helpless. "This is all my fault."

Fone Bone looked up in surprise. "What do you mean?"

"If I worked harder… if I stopped them before they got to ya'… if I woke up sooner…"

"Stop that. It wasn't your fault. None of it is. The bartender gave you unfair pay. And Tony would have hurt us anyway. You couldn't have controlled any of it."

Phoney just sighed. He didn't even have the strength to be angry anymore. He was just tired.

"I'll make sure this never happens again, Fone Bone. I'll be rich someday. I'll be the richest Bone in Boneville. Then we'll have all the food to eat and money we want. And I'll have enough money to send Tony to jail and pay any other idiots that threaten us. I'll have so much money that you don't have to ever work or run or hide from nobody. I'll take care of you guys. And I will do whatever it takes."

Fone Bone looked at his cousin. There was a new light in his eye. There was something he never saw before, and he knew right then that from that moment on that Phoney will never be the same again. None of them will.

Smiley did survive. And Phoney lied for all he was worth about his newly legal guardian being at a family funeral across the country for her husband. He put all the payments on his Aunt's tab and left before they could ask more questions. They learned later that Tony was arrested for a bank robbery and one murder and was sentenced five years in juvenile prison.

Phoney gave Smiley his vest to cover up his scars (the overalls didn't really cover them up) and in return Fone Bone and Smiley saved up enough money to buy Phoney a brand-new black shirt with a gold star in the center. He never wore anything else since.

O.o.O.o.O.o.O

Phoney was getting much better. His delusions almost completely stopped, and his fever went down immeasurably. Gran'ma was glad. She didn't particularly like the Bone, but she liked the cousins. If Phoncible died, she would have felt completely responsible. During the experience, she, Jon, Wendell, and even Euclid felt differently toward Phoney. Gran'ma was walking to Phoney. It looked like he and Jonathon were having a conversation.

"… Old Man's Cave was the mystical stronghold of the Veni-Yan Warriors!" she heard Jonathon say.

"Whoa. You gotta' be kiddin' me." Gran'ma gave a relieved smile. I looked like Phoney was back to normal. "I though you didn't like these guys. The townspeople called 'em stickeateres."

"Oh, that. We thought they were wandering holy men. Monks. Beggars. We didn't know they were the Elite Royal Guardians of the Dreaming! Everybody thought the Veni-Yan disappeared along with the Kingdom!"

"Kingdom? Royal Guardians? Uh oh. Wait a minute—it's all coming back to me…"

Gran'ma spoke up. "Well, look who's feeling better! Good morning, Phoncible!"

Phoncible grabbed Jonathon's shirt and shook him. He seemed a few shades lighter, but this time, it wasn't from fever. "Jon, please tell me Gran'ma Ben isn't Queen of the Valley! PLEASE!"

"I command you to walk with me."

"Oh, I'm beggin' you man…"

"Um. Sorry. She's th' Queen."

"Gah! My life is gonna suck, isn't it?"

"Now, Phoncible," Gran'ma lead Phoney away, "it's not that bad. I'll tell you what, if you agree to behave yourself, I promise not to have your head cut off."

"Ho, ho! That's rich, I'll say," Phoney grumbled.

Gran'ma's smile grew wider. This was the Phoney she knew. And, for what's it worth, she was glad to have him back.

They all were.

So! How did you guy's like it? I know it's a bit cliffy, but then again, this was one of my earlier stories. If you liked this, check out some of my other stories. I've got Percy Jackosn, Gravity Falls, and Danny Phantom. So, favers and followers are great, but reviewers are my favorite! Review please!

I own nothing but this story. I quoted the book a few times, and I do not own those quotes. Bone comic books and everything from it belongs to Jeff Smith.