Flying frogs! Gutter snakes! And Rhubarb Pie!

Now that I got your attention.

This is my first FanFic so I apologize in advance. I don't know who I'm writing this author's note to since no will probably ever read this, but I thought I would apologize just in case. Feel free to comment and rip my writing up, actually I would really appreciate it. So I hope you enjoy the story, or enjoy it as much as you can with the sorry state my writing is in. Thank you for reading… now if I can just figure out how to post it….

(Reformatted)


John Silver walked heavily, his boots treading loudly on the dark cobblestones. His belt clinked as he swayed from side to side comfortably looking around at the bustling city with people sweeping around him. The bright colors and passing talk floating in and out of consciousness, melding into a gentle rumble of conversation.

"You're it!"

Children laughed and shrieked playing tag in the dusty streets, bare feet pattering around weaving among the crowd.

"Go! Go!" the gaggle of children dispersed squealing and shrieking. Two small boys ran past and Silver turned to let them by as they darted away laughing glancing over their shoulders. He watched them run away and smiled at their joy their na?ve innocence.

"Wait guys!" he turned just in time for a small girl to crash into him.

"oof!" She bounced off the sturdy man and landed hard on her rump.

"ow." She said skidding to a stop on the hard stones ill fitted dress crumpling underneath her.

She rubbed her small rear before glancing up at Silver golden eyes growing wide as she saw the large man tower over her.

"oh! Sorry!" she said in a small voice, cowering underneath his shadow.

He backed up, "oh no, it's fine." Behind him he heard a shriek of laughter that caused both of them to look in that direction.

The small girl scrambled to her feet, "guys! Wait for me!" She ran away disappearing into the crowd. Silver shook his head smiling and continued his trek.

Finally entering a bar he pushed open the swinging doors and strode inside, several shadier patrons glanced up at his arrival before looking back down trying to look nonchalant; those would be the criminals. Silver plopped himself down at the bar, belts clinking and jangling as he settled in. The octopus looking barkeep placed a beer in front of him with one of his four arms, nodding a greeting. Silver twitched a grin in thanks and wrapped one of his large hands around the mug taking a swig of the foaming beer grimacing at its taste. He took a quick glance around the dark room, the hushed conversations of shadier characters almost covered the silence, almost. There were secretive whispers of robberies, bribes, and murder; but nothing of interest to the pirate looking for business. Just as Silver was about to give up on his endeavor two frog men walked in, bow legged as all frog men were, they sauntered casually up to the bar swaying awkwardly on green legs flat footed feet slapping the dusty wooden floor. They tilted their fat heads attached to bloated green bodies without necks, using their large floppy caps to hide their faces. One squatted on a stool next to Silver his back turned to the unemployed pirate and the other sat on the stool next to the other facing his partner. Silver raised the mug to his lips watching the two from the corner of his eye.

"I told you, that shipment is trouble, we shouldn't be doing this." Said the paler one whispering.

The muddier colored one growled, "Don't say that, we have to go through with this, he wants us to do this. And you know what 'appens to people who don't do what he says." The brown one looks pointedly at his taller companion gulping down the beer placed in front of him.

"But if it's such a big load then why is he making us do it?" the green one said worriedly.

His fatter companion replied, "It's c'use we're small fry, and if we want to move up we need to prove we can do this."

The tall one was looking green, or greener. "It just doesn't feel right…" he said softly.

The brown one narrowed his eyes. "I ain't care if it don't feel right, we're doin it." He swigged his beer wiping his wide mouth aggressively with the back of his hand.

"And what if we can't?" said the scared one.

The brown one glanced up, "then I'd shoot myself before Jones can git me," he took a sip and looked at his companion, "and you'd best shoot yourself to."

The pale one swallowed and looked down at his lap. Silver heard all this with perfect clarity and he smiled into his mug. Blake Jones, a pirate turned King of Thieves, he owned this town and the next five towns over, the sewage in the gutters practically ran with his filth, the streets were filled waist deep with his muck. The poor lived in fear of him, strangled under his hold, hoping that he never turned his attentions on them and the rich sucked on his milk and kissed his boots, hoping they would not be the next ones to be thrown out onto the streets by igniting his very short temper. Blake Jones was the lying murdering king of an underground kingdom and a man marked for a fall.

Silver raised the mug to his lips and smiled, a very hard fall.

The pale frog man croaked, gulping nervously and sweating through his green skin, the brown one looked at the other and sighed finished his beer. He hopped off the stool and shuffled in his pockets he left a few coins on the bar. Shifting the cap on his smooth bulbous head he nodded for his companion, who hurried after him almost tripping over his webbed feet, and they both left, the wooden doors swinging after their departure. Silver looked after them, Jones's fall was going to start with those two minnows, he swallowed the rest of his beer and reached for his belt. His eyebrows shot up as he noticed the vacant space on his belt, he glanced down at his belt and saw the usual purple pouch for his money was missing. He patted his pockets hoping that he had just absent mindedly stuffed it in one of his pocket, no, no, no! He felt no familiar bulge, no comforting sound of coins clinking together. Where could it possibly be? He suddenly flashed back to the little scrap of a girl that had ran into him. That dirty little urchin had stolen his purse! Silver cursed under his breath, how had he let the girl get his coins? His precious beautiful coins? He was a pirate, a very successful pirate, and he had allowed himself to get robbed by some tiny mouse of a filcher. He groaned and rubbed his face, he was getting rusty. Still angry at himself he reached a large hand into his shirt and pulled out his second purse and muttering curses in several languages he pulled out two copper coins and slammed them on the bar. Stuffing the blue bag back into the secret folds of his shirt he stormed out of the bar his pride suffering and calling for a certain thief's blood.

Wren huddled against the side of the stone building her nose wrinkled in anger. She hated this, she hated them, and she hated Jones. She had reported to the older boys, purple purse held in her hands and they had took it from her. They ripped it open and poured the coins out into one of their dirty palms, and while they counted out the gleaming coins Wren had stood there chewing her lip looking at her dirty bare feet summoning up the courage to finally ask them. They finished counting, or miscounting as it were, and she was still urging the words out of her mouth, they waved her away greed filling their eyes as they slid the silver coins back into the pouch.

She took a deep breath and clenching her fists stepped forward, "can I join your crew now?" she asked in a small voice, how she hated her small voice.

They both glanced up at her taking in her small self, all knobby knees and elbows dirty black hair framing her gaunt face. One boy scoffed and the other stalked up to her, she had to stop herself from stepping back and clenched her jaw in determination.

"You? What do you think we are? Some charity? Go, before the coins you brought us ain't worth our time anymore." He threatened.

She felt the rage boiling inside her. "But!"

Wren spat the mud from her mouth, her knees and hands felt raw and stung. She glanced back at the stone steps the boy had had tossed her down. She rubbed the mud off her arms and picked herself up nearly trembling in anger. It was unfair. She brought in double what their crew got and what did she have to show for it? A bruised knee and scraped palms. She spat out some more mud trying to get the taste out of her mouth. It was because she was small, she angrily paced down the winding streets sewage flowing around her. She was better than all of them, but just because she was small no one wanted her. Damn it! She should have just taken the purse and ran, that was one of the biggest hauls she had ever filched, just the thought of all those shining coins slipping through her fingers and being dirtied by those stupid boys. She quickened her angry pace wanting to kick something, but knew that was a bad idea in her shoeless state. She could've been set for two months with that amount of silver, she could've gotten meat and actual fruit and fresh bread, she could've bought a good knife, something of which she sorely needed the old one being nothing more than an inch long shard of glass wrapped in rags she had taken from the garbage, she could've bought clothes and shoes! God! she could've bought shoes! She could've bought a blanket something warm for the frigid nights, she could've gone to bed full, with cheese and something other than garbage to fill her stomach. And shoes! She could've bought god damn shoes! The more she thought about it the angrier she got practically fuming when she ran into someone.

"ow!" she cried angrily ready to punch anyone at this point, a curse laying ready on her tongue.

Her eyes widened seeing the familiar towering figure, speak of the devil. A look of surprise quickly replaced the angry one, and a look of fear quickly replaced that. She turned ready to hightail out of there, unfortunately Silver was ready for her, her small feet beat against the air as she was lifted into the air by her collar.

Silver looked at the struggling thief kicking the air.

"Let go of me! Let go!" she yelled angrily twisting and turning suspended in his grip.

She was light as a feather and he could tell the kid was way undernourished by the skinny arms punching at him. She jerked and wrenched around trying to make him let go fighting with all the strength her small body could give her.

"Well, well, look what we have here." Silver said mockingly. The girl glared at him, she struggled vainly against the larger man. "Looks like I've caught myself a little theif."

He grinned at the little girl, and she stilled, only to spit venom at the pirate.

"You gutter snipe! Pig! Gorathian lorgak! Fat hoygab! Let me go! Grotesque moraqk! Let me go!" she screamed resuming her struggling even more vigorously.

Silver's eyebrows raised in surprise "What a dirty mouth this little thief has, and she even has the gall to yell for help when she was the one who stole from me."

He raised the girl to his face giving her a hard look and the little thief quieted trembling with anger, golden eyes glaring into his dark ones. Silver was mildly surprised at the girl's extensive knowledge, even cursing him in languages from the farthest reaches of the Coral galaxy a language that's been dead for a hundred years.

"Okay girl, give me back my purse." He said threateningly. He looked at the girl, who glared back at him, they stared each other down for a while golden eyes narrowed at dark ones, finally the huge gold ones glanced to the side, the owner muttering something.

"What?" Silver asked shaking the girl, patience running out, "speak up girl!" the girl glared up again at silver.

"I don't have it!" She shouted angrily.

Silver's mood instantly darkened, he stuck his face right up to her small one, "then who has it?" he asked slowly.

The girl clenched her jaw and grit her teeth together, "it's probably on its way to Jones now." She said coldly.

He set the girl down and turned away to curse, he tightened his grip on the back of her shirt when he felt her tugging and lifted her back up to his face and she struggled some more.

"Very well," He paused an idea coming to him a slow evil grin spreading across his face. "Then you're going to help me get it back."

Wren hated being small, she wished she could just beat up people whenever she wanted, she wished she could be intimidating and scary so that she no longer had to cower and concede to people even when her voice was telling her NO! She gave a half-hearted tug at her dress, more of a potato sack then a dress really, but the man's grip was like iron and there was no way she was getting free. She wished she was big enough to grab his thick meaty wrist and flip him onto the street, or to break his grip, or something; but all she could do was wriggle around helplessly as he dragged her down the street. At least she was too small to turn tricks, she had seen the older, bustier girls use their bodies to earn money and Wren nearly spat in disgust. Her small skinny self was unappealing to males looking for a romp, besides she would rip out their parts before letting them get near her; that much she could do. She twisted again grunting. She had tried wriggling out of her dress to no avail, she had tried to bite him but her head didn't twist around that far, so she resorted to flailing every so often hoping to catch the sturdy man by surprise.

"You're never gonna get it back you know!" she shouted over her shoulder, "Jones never lets go of his loot, he'll rip your throat out before you get close."

Silver brings the girl to face him, "and why do you care?"

She bares her teeth, "cause he'll rip my throat out too." She said coldly, and spat, "just because some lumbering, clumsy, idiot who let his purse get stolen is dumb enough to try and get it back!" She glared at him, and Silver grinned, he like this girl, to cram that much fire and spirit into such a small body was impressive.

"It sounds like you don't like me."

"Of course not, you dumb jurpib!" she yelled

Silver responded calmly, "but you don't like Jones either."

That shut her up. Silver smiled, oh so she doesn't like him. He saw her glare at him gritting her teeth.

He then planted the bomb, "I'm going to make him pay by unloading some of his goods for him. And you can help if you wish."

The small girl had frozen still as a statue. The tiny viper had literally stiffened up rigid as a board in his hands. Silver waited looking into her face. She was burning a hole into the ground with her angry glare.

"Do you hate me or Jones more?"

She immediately looked up at him and said flatly, "I hate you." Spouting it nonchalantly.

Then she grinned, "But I really hate Blake Jones."