That Which Was Lost Long Ago

In the main hall, just a few steps from the entrance to the throne room, Lazlo and Flare were in an animated conversation.

"So in summary, it was a peaceful patrol, Lady Flare," Lazlo finished his report.

"I'm glad to hear that, but..." Flare put her hands on Lazlo's cheeks. "The bags under your eyes are terrible. Are you getting enough rest? Please take this time off to just relax. I know everyone on The Dauntless is relying on you, but don't overdo it, okay?"

Lazlo smiled ruefully. "Yes, Princess."

"Sorry to interrupt, Princess. Someone has come to see Captain Lazlo," Desmond announced.

"Troy!" Lazlo trotted towards the man, who was now a commander of his own independent fleet.

Not affiliated with any kingdom, any state, and not even pirates, Troy now led a group of wandering sea warriors who showed up to help when needed, and have come to the aid of many countries. Thus, despite keeping their independent status, they were acknowledged by the Island Nations.

"Hey, it's been a while," With a gentle look in his dark, mysterious eyes, he caressed Lazlo's cheek and casually kissed his forehead in greeting.

"Oh, looks like Commander Boyfriend is here," Flare giggled.

"L- Lady Flare..."

"Oh, you're adorable when you're embarrassed," Flare ruffled his hair, then took the scrolls from Lazlo's arms. "Well then, I'll take care of these and deliver your report to my father so you two can catch up. Let's go, Desmond."

"Yes, Princess. Excuse us, Captain. Sir Troy," Desmond bowed and followed Flare to the throne room.

"I'm already an adult and she still treats me like a child," Lazlo shook his head, grinning, as he followed Flare and Desmond with his eyes.

"How time flies, you were just a scrawny little boy the first time we met at sea, and barely a man when we all almost lost you..."

Lazlo reached for Troy's hands, smiling up at him. "But you didn't. I'm here." He reached up and lightly slapped the man's forehead. "And that's my line. I thought I lost you when you chose to go down with your ship. When I saw you out at sea, floating, alive. I didn't think twice and jumped overboard. Of course, I got an earful from Desmond and Kenneth afterwards... And then Lady Flare when we got back to Obel... and King Lino..." Lazlo chuckled sheepishly.

"Touché. I guess we both have a thing or two to learn about getting a little less reckless..." Troy ran the back of his fingers on Lazlo's face.

"So what brings you here?"

"About that," Troy looked over his shoulder. "Hey, are you planning to come in or what?"

Snow's head popped in from behind the entrance before he walked in carrying a wooden chest the size of two watermelons.

"Snowe!" Lazlo exclaimed, trotting over to his friend.

"Yo," Snowe walked in.

"You look well," said Lazlo.

"You look... tired. Working yourself to death as always, I see. Is that... rune thing still draining your life and stuff?" Snowe frowned.

"Ah, no, it hasn't done that since it went into its Forgiveness phase. Plus I haven't really needed to use it, thankfully. Our patrols have been really peaceful."

"That's good. So you're just being your usual reckless self then," Snowe smirked.

Lazlo chuckled. "We were just talking about that," He glanced at Troy. "So, what brings you here?"

"I saw him having trouble with his boat along the way when we passed Razril so I let him onboard. We pulled in his boat as well for repairs," said Troy.

"I wasn't too far from Razril when strong winds pushed me towards one of the sea stacks. I was going to turn back and try again at a better time, but since Troy's ship came along, I took him up on his offer instead. Anyway, here ya go," Snowe passed the chest over to Razro.

"What's this?"

"Open it!"

Lazlo put the chest on the floor and pulled up the lid. His eyes sparkled like a little boy who just got birthday presents.

"Troy, look! Cured meats from the famous butcher in Razril. And there's a bunch of snacks too!"

"When the gang heard I was coming to visit, they asked me to give these to you. Everyone misses you, y'know," Snow grinned like a kid.

"It's been a while since I was last there. I'll visit Razril again one of these days."

Razro chuckled when he pulled out familiar wooden toys, a couple of hand-me-down children's books that Snowe gave him for his "birthday", which was the day they found him at sea... and his very first sea map. Lazlo had a nostalgic smile on his face as he remembered the day Commander Glen gave it to him.

"When my father said he was going to throw out things to free up storage in his house, I said I wanted to go through them first in case there was something important. And I'm glad I did because I found some of your stuff."

"Wow, thanks! Hm?" Lazlo tilted his head when he pulled out a plain white linen that had stained from age, and then a fabric that seemed to be made of high-grade material. It felt so soft to the touch. "What are these? I don't think it's mine."

"You probably just don't remember. My father said that's what you were wearing when they found you as a baby. On top of the baby linen, you had a shawl wrapped around you."

Lazlo's eyes widened. "Really...?"

Lazlo caressed the fabric. "I may not remember who my parents are... And they probably don't even know I'm still alive. But now I finally have a proof that I can touch that tells me I do have family somewhere out there... I hope they're doing well, wherever they are. Thank you, Snowe…"

"Ah, geez, don't get emotional on me now," Snowe ruffled his hair then crouched down beside him. "Besides, we're family too, aren't we? I'll always be here for you, just like you've been there for me too."

"Yeah… You're right."

"All right then. That's all I came here for. I don't want to get in the way of your precious lovey dovey time with your boyfriend so I'll be on my way now. Actually, since I'm here I might explore town a bit before leaving. See ya!" And Snowe left.

Lazlo picked up the chest Snowe brought and led Troy to one of the rooms in the palace. Lazlo put the chest down in the corner while Troy walked up to the balcony, resting his hands on the railing as he gazed out at the sea.

"You have a such a nice view from here."

"I still can't believe King Lino's letting me use it," Lazlo stood beside Troy. "He said it's really just for convenience. It was a hassle calling me to come in from The Dauntless every time we needed to talk whenever I was in Obel, so he said to use this room since it was vacant anyway. But it's strange..."

"What is?" Troy turned to Lazlo.

"After being out in the sea for days, I can't seem to get used to sleeping on land anymore. When we were training as knights of Gaien, we would only be on a ship for a couple of days at most. On patrolling duties. Up on The Dauntless, we could be out in the sea for weeks, even months at a time, covering the Island Nations depending what we need to do and where we need to be. So I'm kind of looking for that, I guess?" Lazlo grinned sheepishly.

"What's 'that'?" Troy gave him a blank look.

"You know, that. The feeling of always swaying, whether you're just standing or moving or even in bed! Ehehe" Lazlo chuckled.

"Ahh... you mean like this?"

Troy scooped the shorter man up in his arms.

"Whoa!"

And then gently swayed him side to side.

"Well? How's this? Does it feel like you're out in the sea now?" Troy asked.

Lazlo laughed.

His laughter resounded all the way to the door which was left ajar, catching the attention of King Lino and Desmond who happened to be passing by outside his room. Hearing the young man's laughter made the king smile.

"Well this is a rare sight. It's so nice to see the Captain having fun like this," Desmond commented.

"Is it? I've seen him laugh a few times. For someone who has been through a lot, his ability to smile at those around him was what drew me to this boy," said Lino.

"Ah, perhaps Your Highness has never noticed, but the Captain has only ever let his guard down around you. Perhaps that is why though he smiles at everyone, it is only when he's with you that he's most relaxed."

"Then I am happy to provide that place for him. He has become like a son to me, so to be the place where he can truly breathe is someone I'd gladly be..." said Lino, gazing at Lazlo with a fond smile. "Let's go. Let's not interrupt the lovebirds."

Once they were out of Lazlo's earshot, Desmond tentatively asked. "Pardon me sire, but I heard from Setsu that you were planning to name the Captain as your heir?"

"Ah, Setsu and his big mouth..." Lino sighed. "Yes, but before that, there was one thing I wanted to discuss with him. And depending on how things go from there, it may very well be my final gift."

"Final gift, Your Highness?"

"Yes. The gift of choice. Before I put such a heavy burden on him, I want to help him find his real family. If and when he does find them, only then will I ask him if he wants to stay with us and be my heir, or be with his real family and take a different path." Lino smiled ruefully. "After Troy leaves, tell Lazlo I want to speak with him."

"As you wish, Your Highness."

Back in Lazlo's room, Lazlo's eyes were starting to drift close. The smell of the sea, the gentle breeze, and the warmth offered by Troy's arms were lulling him to sleep.

"Troy, I think you better put me down before I fall asleep like this," Lazlo let out a yawn.

"Perhaps you should. You seem exhausted," said Troy, frowning slightly.

"But we haven't seen each other... in so long..." Lazlo weakly protested.

"Lazlo, look at me," said Troy.

"Hm?"

The moment Lazlo looked up, Troy captured his lips. Caught by surprise, Lazlo's eyes widened momentarily, and then closed as he wrapped his arms around Troy as well. Troy walked back into the bedroom and gently laid Lazlo down on the bed before breaking their kiss.

Troy got up only to close the curtains and then lock the door.


Lazlo stirred and fumbled on the sheets beside him. He opened his eyes and saw Troy was no longer there. He had already been cleaned and changed into a fresh set of clothes.

"Troy..." He jumped out of bed and pulled the curtains open to look out on the port, which was visible from the palace even at night. He sighed in relief when he saw Troy's ship was still there.

"Oh, you're awake."

Lazlo swiftly looked behind him when the door creaked open and he heard Troy's voice.

Troy chuckled. "What's with that face? You didn't think I'd leave without saying goodbye, did you?"

Lazlo grinned.

"I figured you'd be hungry so I brought you some food," Troy set a tray with bread, seafood chowder, a side of simmered seasonal vegetables, and a glass of water on the two-seater round table at the corner of the room.

Lazlo's stomach growled at the sight of food and the mouthwatering aroma.

"Thanks. I'm starving," he sat down and ate. "Would you like some?"

"Thank you, but I'm full. The king was kind enough to invite me to join them for supper. The princess was worried because you hadn't woken up for a while."

"Worried? But I was only asleep for a few hours," Lazlo's head tilted to the side.

"Actually, a day and a half. You slept all night yesterday, and all day today."

Lazlo paused halfway from taking a bite of freshly baked loaf. Then he let out a big sigh, muttering to himself, "Ahhh, I'm such an idiot. I wanted to spend time with you but I slept on you. What a waste… Sorry, Troy."

"Not at all. I got to watch your sleeping face as much as I want. That's no waste at all," Troy winked.

Lazlo snorted. "Silly."

"Lazlo, you're on break from patrolling now, aren't you? Would you like to come with me? To Razril," Troy asked. "I discussed this with King Lino as well over dinner and he seems fine with it. But of course, only if you-"

"YES!" Lazlo blurted out. "I miss everyone."

Troy wiped a piece of minced carrot stuck on Lazlo's cheek with his thumb. "I suppose it's decided then. All right, tonight I'll go ahead and return to my ship to prepare for departure. You stay here and get your things ready and do what else you need to do. Tomorrow, we sail for Razril."

Lazlo beamed.


Lino was reading through scrolls Setsu brought earlier when he heard someone knock.

"Sorry to bother you, Your Highness. It's me, Lazlo," Lazlo's voice came from the other side.

"Ah, come in," Lino put the scrolls down and looked up. "What's up?"

Lazlo came in bringing an assortment of snacks and dried meat in colourful paper wrapping.

"I received a lot of presents from my friends in Razril, I thought you and the princess might like these. These snacks in particular would go well with Lady Flare's special tea. And these dried meats are good for taking with you on out to sea."

King Lino looked pleased. "I can't wait to try them. Thank you."

"And Desmond said you wanted to talk to me about something, Your Highness?"

"Ah, yes, about that," Lino got up and walked towards the window. "I'm not gonna beat around the bush. Lazlo, have you ever thought about finding your parents?"

Lazlo's eyes widened at the question. He stayed silent for a moment, thinking of what to say. It was the first time somebody had ever asked him that.

"I... It's not like I've never thought of it. I do want to know who they are. And if I have any other family. But I didn't know where to even begin. I never had a clue. Something, anything, to go by to start any kind of search..."

Lino thought it was selfish of him to feel the way he did, but he couldn't deny the relief that washed over him. But it was short-lived, as Lazlo's next words took him by surprise.

"Until now, that is."

Lino's head jerked towards him. "What do you mean?"

"Yesterday, Snowe came to visit me. He brought these presents from my friends in Razril, but there was something else. A shawl. Apparently, his father said I was wrapped in an infant linen as well as that when the knights found me at sea."

"At sea?" Lino frowned. "I was aware that you were taken in by the Vingerhuts but I didn't know the circumstances behind it."

"Ah, yes. At least, that's what I've been told. I was adrift at sea when the knights of Gaien found me when they were out patrolling."

"I see... It must have been tough for you, growing up without a mother or a father."

Lazlo smiled wistfully. "I did have Snowe, my friends... and Commander Glen. I never knew what it was like to have a father, but he had always protected us. Always..."

"Lazlo, the reason I asked is because I wanted to offer my help in finding your parents. If, one day, you decide to set out on a journey to find them, that is. When that time comes, please allow me to help you. It's the least I can do to thank you for everything," Lino smiled warmly at Lazlo.

"But... I am not asking for anything in return, Your Highness. If anything, I am the one who's grateful because you took me and my friends in when we had nowhere else to go. And you've given me a place to call home."

"I know, I know... But grant me this selfish wish, Lazlo. I want to give you the chance to be with your family… something I failed to do for my own son," Lino smiled bitterly as he turned towards the portrait of his late wife and the infant in her arms.

Smiling ruefully, Lazlo said, "All right. Then, when that time comes, please allow me to rely on you, King Lino."

That night, Lazlo could not sleep, tossing and turning in bed.

He wondered if it was because he slept too much, or was too excited about his trip with Troy to Razril, or if he was conflicted about what King Lino had said. Or perhaps all of the above.

'I do want to know who my family is. But even if I never find them, I'll be okay.

After all, I have Troy, my friends...

And even if I never knew what having a family is like. Having felt the love and kindness of King Lino and Princess Flare... I guess I can be a little selfish and think maybe this is the closest thing to having a family I'll ever have. And I couldn't be happier...'

He got up and pulled out his mother's shawl. He did not understand it then, but as he held it close, he thought of the woman he always saw in his dreams and constantly protected him from the Rune of Punishment.

And just like that, he fell asleep. He had a peaceful expression on his face as he dreamt of the sea and heard a far off lullaby.


The next day, Flare was talking to Tetsu when the woman in charge of housekeeping frantically ran to her.

"Princess! Has Sir Lazlo left already?"

"Yes, but not too long ago. They might still be at the port, why?" Flare frowned.

"Ahhh, he left this on his bed. It looks like a woman's shawl. I wonder if it was supposed to be a present for a friend..."

"Oh, dear. That child. Give it to me, I'll try to get to the port as fast as I can and see if I can catch him!" Flare snatched the shawl and bolted out of the palace.

"Good luck, Princess!"

Despite her best efforts, by the time she got to the lottery store she knew it was no use. Troy's ship was already too far out. Even if she were to run all the way down to the port, there was no way anyone on board would still see her.

"Oh well, I guess he'll just have to take this on his next visit," Flare sighed in defeat. Running her hand through the soft and silky fabric, she smiled. "Still, what a beautiful and high-grade material. That child has surprisingly good taste."

"What are you doing out here, Flare?" Lino said as he emerged from the path to the port.

"Oh, nothing. It seems like Lazlo forgot something so I was going to take it to him. But I guess I was too late."

"Too late indeed. I saw them off a while ago. I just finished a nice long chat with the fishermen there and- wait, why do you have this?" Lino frowned, taking the shawl from Flare. His eyes widened in recognition. "I haven't seen this for over twenty years! Where did you find your mother's shawl?"

"What?! Father, are you sure?" Flare was taken aback.

"There's no mistake. I know because I gave this to her as a present. In fact..." Lino turned the fabric around until he found a flower intricately embroidered on it. "Ah, here, see? I had it personalized. You know this flower, don't you?"

"Mother's favourite flower..." Flare put her hand over her mouth in surprise. "Then why did Lazlo..."

"Hm? What about Lazlo?" The king asked.

"Oh, good day Your Highness! Princess!" Snow approached, smiling. He was carrying a paper bag filled with fruits, bread, and other goods from the trading shop.

"Oh, aren't you Lazlo's friend?" Lino asked.

"Yes, Your Highness. My name is Snowe."

"Yes. Lazlo did mention you came by. Why are you still here? I thought you had left with them to Razril."

Snowe blinked owlishly. "Wait, Lazlo's going to Razril?!" He gawked. "Why didn't they tell me?! Arrrrgh I could've gotten a ride instead of rowing all the way home! Geez... Huh?" Snowe looked curiously at the fabric on Lino's hands.

"Your Highness, I don't mean to pry but, why do you have Lazlo's shawl?"

"What are you talking about? This is-"

"Father! Sorry, please let him speak," Flare hastily said. "I'd like to know as well, are you certain this belongs to Lazlo?"

"Positive, Princess, I brought it to him myself. That's the reason why I came all the way from Razril. My father said that when Lazlo was found as a baby, he was wrapped in that."

Both Lino and Flare stared at Snowe, speechless. Snowe was beginning to wonder if he said anything wrong until Lino spoke.

"You won't be rowing home on a boat, lad. We're going to Razril. Take me to your father, I'd like to speak with him, I have a lot of questions to ask."

Snow was stunned. "Eh?! What business would you have with that old man?"

"My youngest son was just a baby when he was lost at sea. Before she died, whenever my late wife had to leave for her royal duties, our son would cry. And nothing, and no one could soothe him, until his caretaker borrowed one of my wife's shawl's and wrapped him in it. It worked like magic and instantly calmed him.

On that fateful day, when their ship was attacked, my late wife was with him. So was that caretaker. And I have not seen this shawl in all those years... until today."

Snowe was speechless. Utterly shocked. Flare looked like she was about to cry.

"Father, you don't mean..."

"If what Snowe told us is true, we may have something very important to retrieve in Razril."

Lino clutched on to his wife's shawl.

"That which we thought we had already lost long ago."

~ Fin ~


A/N:

Hey everyone! It's been a while. When I played Suikoden 4, this idea came to me and I knew I just had to write it for our boy Lazlo.

How have you all been? I've started posting on AO3 lately, but I must say, is still the best for me. Nothing beats the readers here, as well as the nice feedback you all are so generous to give. Always.

I've had fics that have been up for /years/ and yet you guys are still giving it so much love. And I have also failed to update my stories for years, and yet here you are still being very very patient with me. You have my endless thanks. :D