Chapter X – Buckets of Rain

A/N: Well, this is the end. Since finishing this fic (actually months ago) I've picked up my original work again and am kind of absorbed in that, but I'll still be coming out with more FF8 fanfiction from time to time - probably one-shot stuff mostly until I get another big idea for a longer story like this one. I hope you've all liked it and I appreciate everyone who has read and reviewed. I'm honestly about as proud of this thing as anything I've written. I think in some aspects it's better than my novel and I hope some of what I've learned writing it will bridge the gap to novel #2. In any case, this is the last chapter, so, I don't know if anyone says this anymore but R&R!

Rebekka - I'm glad you picked up on that, lol.


I like your smile and your fingertips
I like the way that you move your hips
I like the cool way you look at me
Everything about you is bringing me misery


Weeks went by. The question of where exactly everyone had gone was the elephant in the room every time Squall met with his remaining commander. It was an unbreakable stalemate - headmaster too proud to ask and commander too sure that he eventually would to give in himself.

Squall's job required him to know that Rinoa had resigned her ambassadorship when the incumbent president of Timber had been narrowly defeated in his reelection bid. Among the new president's first acts would have undoubtedly been to dismiss her and she, perhaps selfishly, had decided to deny him the satisfaction at least in part. Where Ms. Leonhart had gone though - whether she was still in Timber or had retired to somewhere quieter - wasn't really a hot topic with the new administration coming in, despite being what the headmaster of Balamb Garden most wanted to know.

Seifer he could guess. Back to Esthar, that was a no-brainer. Let alone that he'd spent years stagnating in Balamb Garden, he had been Esthar's most famous and promising young doctor when he left. His time away would be seen as something like a prophet having disappeared into the desert searching for answers and for the voice of god. And now he was come – emerging from the wilderness with beard and hair unshorn, belly swollen with starvation but mind overflowing with arcane wisdom granted by the almighty. Some kind of horseshit like that in some form or another. More power to him, Squall thought. He held no sore feelings for Seifer anymore. Not for lack of trying – but the headmaster found now that night after night of wallowing in his own tumescence of indignant romantic agony and a river of alcohol had left him dried out. The process of grieving his lost marriage – and now his lost friends – had run its course like the wind blowing itself out, like the heat death of the universe wherein every potential reaction of every chemical has already taken place and there is nothing left resolve. Everything had come now to an impotent equilibrium. His pain was a spent force and now he wanted only to make things morally right – at least so far as he was able. For Seifer, perhaps most of all. He recognized even in his drought of emotion that he had done Seifer a great wrong and that there was no fixing it – not in a way that would make things the same as they were. There was no going back there now. But there was never any going back anywhere – never had been. That there was or that there would be was one of the great lies. Lies told by everyone – to each other, to those who would give them money in exchange for such false hope, and to themselves perhaps most of all.

Xu, the latest departure from his life, was not a mystery. She had called him a few days after leaving. She had explained. It wasn't all the situation at hand. It wasn't even mostly that. Mostly it was something much simpler and less damning to Squall's conscience – she was ready for a change and for a new chapter in life. He respected that. She had gone to Dollet and was hoping to find similar military administrative work as she'd done in Garden but in a fresh setting with new faces.

Quistis, and Selphie and Irvine, however, were another matter entirely. Seifer drew the most visceral sense of wrongdoing with his bum leg and sob story background as the prodigal son – the unwitting tool and ultimately victim of the sorceress. Squall frowned internally at himself for framing it in such a callous way. But disregarding that, it was Quistis and Selphie and Irvine he owed the most to, and to whom he had done the worst injustice. They, the perhaps less notorious half of the Fated Children, had been unwaveringly faithful throughout the years. They had only broken faith now when forced to on moral grounds. In short, in Squall's most selfish moments he could easily point to the wrongs done to him by both Rinoa and Seifer, though the former was a more complicated issue and the latter a very simple on. But there were no such mitigating resentments to be had for Quistis or Selphie or Irvine.

He decided to call Zell and break the stalemate. The phone rang four times before the commander picked up. It was his day off.

"Zell," Squall said as soon as he heard the click of the call being picked up.

"Uh, yeah?" Zell hesitated. Squall never called him on his day off. In fact Squall never called him at all if he could help it.

"I need to ask you something," Squall said.

"Ok man, spit it out," Zell answered.

"Where are they?" Squall asked simply.

"What?" Zell said.

"You know who I'm talking about," Squall hoped Zell would make this easy. "I have to make things right."

"Right, uh…" Zell scratched the back of his head. "Seifer is in Esthar, but you probly coulda guessed that."

"Where in Esthar?" Squall asked briskly.

"At his old lab. They're doing some kind of groundbreaking research into…" Zell started to explain but Squall cut him off.

"Do you have a number?" he asked.

"Uh, yeah," he recited the number and Squall wrote it down.

"Go on," Squall encouraged.

"Quistis has actually been at the orphanage since she left Garden. She's been helping Cid and Edea with some stuff and figuring out what she wants to do in the long term," Zell explained. "She hasn't really taken it well at all. Balamb Garden's all she knows. I think the Kramers were the next best thing."

"Right," Squall said, making another note on the pad in front of him on his desk. "Next?"

"Uh…" Zell paused, questioning what Squall might be up to. He was also still a little groggy – in fact he was still in bed. "Selphie and Irvine are still in Balamb in their same place. Irvine's thinking about looking for work at some point but they're just kinda taking it easy for right now and being home for Little Irvine."

"Ok," Squall scribbled another note. "And?"

"Well…" Zell hesitated. "I guess that leaves Rinoa?"

"I guess it does," Squall agreed.

"Squall, what are you thinkin' about doing?" Zell detoured.

"Just leave that to me, Zell. I need to know how to get ahold of her. I can't just let this fester forever," Squall replied.

"Okay. She's uh… you know she's not the ambassador to Galbadia anymore," Zell started.

"Of course, she resigned," Squall replied.

"Well, not really," Zell said.

"What do you mean?" Squall furrowed his brow.

"That was sort of a… bad take," Zell explained.

"I don't understand," Squall said.

"Some of the less-friendly Timber media jumped on it since they all thought she was gonna be fired anyway, and the new president let them think that because he doesn't like her. But that's not really what happened. She resigned as ambassador to Galbadia because Laguna appointed her as Esthar's ambassador to Timber," Zell said. "He doesn't like the new Timber president either and wanted to kind of… stick it to him I guess? And he wanted Rinoa to be taken care of too. Rinoa was all for it herself since she felt like it would be the best way to help Timber."

"What?" Squall was dumbstruck. "How am I…" he shook his head. Gears were turning – he couldn't understand this. "I spoke to my father yesterday. Why wouldn't he have mentioned this?"

"Uh, well… It's kind of a powder keg?" Zell sounded sheepish. "He knew you'd feel ways about it. He thought it might be better to let you see the press release when it came out than to tell you himself."

Laguna had been acting a little weird over the last few weeks, now that Squall thought of it. He never would have pegged Laguna as being good at hiding anything. Maybe he wasn't, and that was more a sign of how self-absorbed Squall had become. Had always been. "And when is this press release?" Squall asked, having a sneaking suspicion that Zell would know the exact date. He knew too many other things not to know.

"Tomorrow," Zell blurted. "That's why it's… kinda weird that you're asking now. I was expecting this conversation tomorrow, not today. What are you gonna do?"

"I'm…" Squall stopped, thinking it over one last time before speaking it to Zell and making it real. Making it something he had to follow through on. "I'm going to throw a party for them."

Invitations went out a couple of days later. They weren't all the same. Most were – save for six.

You are hereby formally invited to the eleventh anniversary celebration of Sorceress Ultimecia's defeat. Festivities will be held in the quad of Balamb Garden beginning at 7:00 PM. Attend as a guest of honor and enjoy fine food and drink and live entertainment courtesy of Balamb Garden, as a small thank you for your part in the salvation of all existence. Please come.

"Erm, ambassador?" Rinoa's new secretary asked. "There's a letter for you, marked high importance. It's been stamped by President Loire?"

"What?" Rinoa was confused. "Let me see it," she said, and the secretary came in from the exterior office to hand it to her.

She read the invitation. She set it down on the desk and looked out the window feeling drunk. Then as she felt at the envelope with her thumbs she realized there was something else in it. Something that would not be in the envelopes sent to Seifer, Quistis, and the Kinneas family. She pulled it out – three pages folded together in thirds. Divorce papers. At the bottom of the last page was Squall's signature. He had let go, finally, and now they could say goodbye in person with nothing left unresolved, ready to move on, ready for whatever was next.

Weeks passed again and the night of the party came. And though some felt they owed him nothing and wanted nothing from him either, everyone came. By boat, by airship, by train, one by one they arrived in Balamb Town and then trickled into Balamb Garden to find accommodations prepared. He knew they would come. In the day or two leading up to the banquet, Squall was nowhere to be seen. That hadn't changed by party time.

Seifer was walking through the front gate when a voice came from behind.

"Hey! Wait up!" Quistis called after him.

Seifer turned and gave her a deadpan look, and then glanced down to his cane and back up to her.

"Sorry," she said sheepishly. "Come on."

They walked through the front parking lot together, toward the turnstiles which led to the lobby.

"So what do you think this is about?" she asked.

"Well the invitation already told us that," Seifer answered. "What I'm not sure of is what I'm doing here."

"That's what I meant," said Quistis. "It can't just be what what the invitation said. I don't think anyone thinks it is. Neither of us would be here if we did, right?"

"Right," Seifer agreed.

"Have you seen Irvine and Selphie?" she asked.

"Not yet. My guess is we won't see them until tonight," he shrugged.

The Fated Children were not the only ones on the guest list. Everyone - literally everyone who had been involved with Garden at the time of Ultimecia's defeat and in the months prior - had gotten an invite. Cid and Edea Kramer had come into town with Quistis, but had opted to stay in Balamb hotel instead of Garden itself. Dr. Kadowaki had come too, and Nida, and Ellone and Laguna. Xu had come too. There were over a hundred others - various SeeDs, students, and current and former employees of the Garden all the way down to cafeteria busboys.

The live band began playing at 6:30 PM to greet the arriving guests. It was a full orchestra. The food was already laid out - great platters of seafood and grilled meat and hors d'oeuvres ranging from charcuterie to fresh fruits and cheeses. Drinks all around. The finest wines - both sparkling and flat - from every corner of the globe on silver trays carried by footmen in full livery. It would seem at a glance that Squall had bankrupted Balamb Garden such was the extravagance on offer.

"This is insane," Selphie muttered to Irvine as they took in the spectacle. The quad had never sparkled like this before and likely wouldn't again.

"Yeah I don't know what Squall has planned but it's gotta be big. He might even lock the doors on us and set the place on fire," Irvine snickered, and snatched a champagne flute from a passing footman. "Thanks," he winked at the man, and downed the contents of the glass.

Selphie shot Irvine a disgusted look.

"What?" he asked with mild outrage. "I was joking."

Selphie shook her head. They both knew that on some level he wasn't completely joking, and that Selphie was thinking the same thoughts. This whole shindig was making a convincing case for Squall having completely lost his mind.

"Selphie! Irvine!" Rinoa called, and came walking up beside them. She was wearing the same cream-colored dress and shoes as the night of the SeeD banquet where she met Squall. It seemed appropriate. Everything coming full circle.

"Rinoa," Selphie hugged her, while Irvine stood back with a nod and smile. There was no awkwardness. Apologies had already long been made and bridges mended since the scene at White Centra Bay - between everyone. Squall was the only exclusion, and that had been largely by choice. They all expected that tonight would be that last puzzle piece falling into place.

"This is... rather extravagant," Rinoa surveyed the party with wide eyes.

"We were just sayin' that," Irvine replied. "I guess Squall's gonna be makin' some kinda grand entrance. That's probably why no one's seen him."

Rinoa looked contemplative. She shook her head. "That's not like Squall," she said, subdued.

"Well hey hey, come on, let's eat!" Selphie said excitedly.

"Well hold on, where are we even sitting?" Rinoa looked out across the quad toward the tables.

"Yeah, first thing's first," Irvine agreed.

They walked over to the dining area adjacent to the serving tables and found a large circular one at the center. In the middle of the table was a folded sheet of paper, propped up so that both signs showed the words "Reserved for the Fated Children."

"Guess that's us," Irvine shrugged. Then they looked closer and at each place setting was a smaller folded piece of paper with a name. They each had an assigned seat.

"I guess he really wants to be sure of where we're sitting so the sniper shoots the right person?" Irvine chuckled.

"Irvy, STOP!" Selphie stomped a foot and demanded.

"Alright, alright," Irvine threw his hands up innocently.

"Oh hey, there's Zell!" Rinoa said, and waved at the blonde who was approaching from the other side of the room. "I'll bet he knows something..."

As usual Zell was in full SeeD dress regalia. He never passed up an opportunity to wear that outfit. "Guyyyysss!" he shouted with a toothy grin as he walked up, and pulled Rinoa and then Selphie into a group hug. When they pulled back, he slapped hands with Irvine. Each grabbed the other by the thumb, and then they knocked shoulders.

Rinoa rolled her eyes. "You know you guys can hug like normal people right? You're not gonna turn into Seifer just because you touched a Man once."

"I resent your homophobia, ma'am, and am of a mind to report you to the authorities," Seifer said from behind, and everyone had a laugh. He and Quistis had approached quietly enough not to be noticed - not even by the familiar clack of Seifer's cane against the floor.

Rinoa looked worried for a moment, and then Seifer's deadpan expression broke and he held one arm out to her. She embraced him warmly, and when they separated she embraced Quistis too. She'd come to terms with the truth of their shared past now, and whatever feelings she'd had for him seemed like another lifetime now.

"I'm so glad everyone is here," Rinoa said.

"Yeah. I just wish Fujin and Raijin were around to enjoy this moment," Seifer frowned.

Zell placed a hand on Seifer's shoulder and squeezed gently. He didn't speak of them often anymore.

"So we were just about to ask Zell," Rinoa started again, "you've been here all along. You have to know what Squall is planning, right?"

"Planning?" Zell asked. "What do you mean?"

"This obviously isn't just about the anniversary of Ultimecia's defeat," Quistis noted. "It seems we've all figured that out except for the one person here who should know it better than any of us."

"No, I don't know," Zell said truthfully. "To be honest with you I haven't even seen Squall this week."

Everyone stopped and traded a series of worried glances at that.

"I'm sure he's planning some kind of big entrance," Zell said. "Or it's the opposite and he's not gonna show up at all. He doesn't seem to think anyone wants to see him anyway."

Rinoa frowned. "He thinks everyone is still mad at him?"

Zell looked noncommittal. "Ehh I don't know. I think he's more mad at himself y'know? And he's embarrassed too. Hard to make the first move I guess. He's probably hoping that putting on this shindig will make you all reach out to him first."

"You're beginning to rival Rinoa and myself as an expert Squall observer," Quistis raised an eyebrow.

"Aw it's not like that," Zell shrugged. "I just pay attention I guess. He's not exactly hard to figure out anymore."

"Well," Seifer cleared his throat, "I for one am definitely looking forward to talking about Squall all night while the food gets cold."

"Seifer's right," Irvine said. "I'm eating, you can all do what you like."

Seifer turned and held an arm out with half mocking daintiness. Irvine shrugged, laced his own through it and they walked together like dates to where the dishes were stacked at the end of the table.

Behind them, Selphie was steaming and Irvine knew it. That's why he'd done it. But it was all in good fun. They all had a laugh and went to be served. Then they ate and drank and talked, enjoying themselves and each other like it was the vacation that White Centra should have been.

Everyone was here now. Cid and Edea had found a table with Xu and Nida and Dr. Kadowaki, and all had been catching up. After food and drink came more drink, and then the tables mingled and everyone had a chance to visit with everyone else. There was a call to the dance floor and the band launched into an upbeat, shuffling jazz number. Quistis pulled Zell onto the dance floor, much to his embarrassment, and then passed him to Selphie and Rinoa in turn, and then they did the same to Irvine who handled it with a bit more grace than the martial artist had. Seifer sat at the table kneading his cane with his fingers, happily watching the others dance and laughing at Zell.

It turned eight o' clock and everyone was back at the table now. There was still some dancing by the others - namely Cid waltzing with Dr. Kadowaki and Edea instructing Nida in the same - poor Nida was an even worse dancer than Zell.

Then the PA came to life and a voice came over the line. "Attention partygoers - please standby for a special eight thirty announcement from Headmaster Leonhart," it said.

"Well there it is," Seifer smirked. "We all figured right - he had an ulterior motive for bringing us here. Bets on what it's going to be? A proclamation of his undying love for Rinoa?"

Rinoa looked somber but forced a smile. She hadn't mentioned to anyone about Squall finally signing the divorce papers.

"Or... maybe for Quistis? Or maybe he'll tell us all to get fucked and that he's retiring to The Island Closest to Heaven," Seifer gave the blonde a sideways glance and she backhanded him with her napkin. "Ugh!" he recoiled. "Security! This woman is beating a cripple! A GAY cripple! Hate crime in progress!" he cried.

"Shut up! Shut up you dolt you're going to get us kicked out of here!" Quistis was speaking through clenched teeth, but mostly because she was trying not to laugh.

At eight thirty the lights dimmed, and a large monitor at the north end of the room lit up. It was blank, but illuminated nonetheless, and it bathed the party in the comfortable gray of an empty television screen.

"What the hell," Zell muttered.

"A recording?" Selphie said, puzzled.

The screen cut to the headmaster's desk, with Squall sitting behind it. It was indeed a recording.

Welcome back everyone. First and foremost I want to thank you all for coming to this thing. I'm sorry that I couldn't be here - if you haven't guessed, this is a pre-recorded message and I'm no longer present in Balamb Garden.

It's been eleven years now since we stopped Sorceress Ultimecia. What she sought to do, achieving time compression, would have affected not only everyone here now, but maybe everyone, everywhere, always. It truly cannot be overstated, the gift that was given to the world that day. And while I have received much of the credit, and done less than I should have to deflect it, I did not defeat Ultimecia. We defeated Ultimecia. All of us – not only those of us who confronted her directly, but everyone who served Balamb Garden in the preamble to the fulfillment of its purpose. Everyone who fought in the Battle of Galbadia Garden. Everyone who defended Balamb Garden from the NORG uprising. Every SeeD, every cadet, every student. Every instructor. Every cafeteria cook and table busser and dishwasher. Even the monsters inhabiting the training center had their own unwitting part to play. Every individual to grace these halls in the months leading up to that day was a part of that victory by which everyone for all of time has been afforded continued life and existence. The world can never thank you enough and so, I thank you personally tonight for your service and for your sacrifices.

Now, with that out of the way, there are a few things that I would like to say. I hope that given the quality of the food, and the liquor, and the entertainment, you can all allow me to bore you for the time necessary. If I am owed anything by anyone it is this, now, and I promise I will never ask anything of you again.

In the eleven years since Ultimecia, a lot has changed. I learned that, far from being the orphan I thought I was, my father was the president of Esthar. Then I married the love of my life. I thought everything was perfect. Unfortunately, things don't always happen the way we plan. Along the way she became sick, and I had to ask for help from the person who at one time had been my worst enemy. And to that person I am eternally grateful for saving her. I will never be able to repay him. I learned that people I had dismissed - people who I thought were loud and annoying, or who I wished wouldn't burden me with their problems, were the people I would come to count on most. That the people I thought were the least thoughtful would end up giving me the best advice. That the people you underestimate can be hiding the most strength inside.

But most of all, I learned a lot about myself. Especially in the last few months. I've learned that in my own way I've been trying to compress time just like Ultimecia. To hold onto the past and move into the future all at once. And it's made me a ghost in the present. I can't be a ghost. And I cannot continue as Headmaster of Balamb Garden.

There is something of a tradition here, of leaders leaving abruptly. Of leaving a monumental task to a successor without so much as a hint beforehand of the burden that is to be taken on. Tonight I am honoring that tradition.

I, Squall Leonhart, hereby resign my post as Headmaster of Balamb Garden, effective immediately. As my last act in my capacity as leader, I hereby appoint Quistis Trepe, Selphie Kinneas, and Zell Dincht as Co-Headmistresses and Co-Headmaster, respectively. I will entertain no notions of rejection with regard to these appointments. If this new triumvirate still possesses any love or consideration for me as a friend and peer and brother, they will take this responsibility without complaint as I took it from Cid. I will recommend, however, in my new capacity as Headmaster Emeritus, that Dr. Seifer Almasy be reinstated immediately to his post, should he accept.

I have one final request. Rinoa Heartilly, please reach under the table and take the note. Read it.

Thank you, everyone, again, and goodbye. I am more thankful for you all than you could ever know. Goodbye.

The screen cut to black. The lights came up and the room sat dumbstruck. The silence seemed like it would stretch on forever, until finally it broke with an excited yelp.

"WOOHOO!" Zell cheered, and leapt from his seat. He began strutting a circuit around the table, high-stepping, head thrown back in ecstasy, hands stuck in his back pockets, chanting "Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Headmaster, baby! Oh yeah!"

Quistis and Seifer both looked thoughtful but not exactly surprised. Irvine and Selphie were talking amongst themselves about what they would do, and doing their best to keep their voices down.

A murmur began to rise as the rest of the partygoers exchanged whispers. It built in volume until the room was fully engulfed in exclamations of shock and awe at the now Headmaster Emeritus' resignation.

"Rinoa? Are you ok?" Seifer asked, snapping her out of what felt like a semi-coma.

"Yeah, I'm alright," she answered. Then she reached under the table, groping blindly with her fingers, and there she found the note secured with tape. The paper was cream-colored like her dress. She unfolded it, and found a single paragraph in Squall's handwriting.

If you want to start over, start fresh, without everything that got in the way of us before, come to Winhill. Let's leave the past in the past and give it another try. I don't know what will happen. Maybe we'll find out that we were right to separate. Or maybe we'll find out that we never gave ourselves a proper chance. Whatever you decide, I'll be waiting here. No commitments. No legally binding documents this time. Just another try.

Rinoa folded the note, and breathed deeply as her hands fell to her lap.

"What does it say?" Seifer asked.

Squall walked up the path into Winhill, with a single tote bag slung over his right shoulder. He looked up ahead and saw the town center where his new pub waited. He smiled and walked on, with many hopes and no expectations.

THE END


A/N: Thanks again everybody. Writing this fic was an absolute blast for me, and I hope it's been at least a fraction as fun to read.