I do not own Divergent.


TW: mentions of abuse, argument


I couldn't believe it.

Tris wanted to expose Eli to Evelyn?

I knew I was harsh to my mother, but I liked to think that I had a pretty good reason to. She'd abandoned me as a child. She'd left me with my abusive father. As much as she claimed she'd had no other choice, I didn't think that was even close to the truth.

She could have done something.

I had attended her funeral.

I had been helpless.

I had grown up thinking she had died.

What kind of mother did that to an innocent child, knowing that they were leaving them in an unsafe household with someone like Marcus? What was the logic in that decision?

And it was putting a wall between Tris and I.

Of course I hated it. She was my best friend, my wife, and the mother of my daughter. What would I do if we weren't able to work this out?

Honestly, I didn't even know how it happened.

She'd told me that she wanted to let Evelyn meet Eli. I had been upset, sure, but I hadn't yelled or lost my temper. We'd simply.. talked, in a way.

I missed her.

Eli squirmed in my arms and I kissed her tiny fingers in return. All I could think was that I would never leave my little girl with someone like him. Not in a million years. Even if it meant doing something stupid. She would always come before me. Before everything.

Zeke shook his head. "You are such a sucker for that kid."

"Oh, come on," Uriah said. "We finally know that he does, indeed, feel emotions like any other human."

That joke had gotten old quickly.

Of course I had emotions. While having a child had apparently made me more willing to share them, I was still an.. emotional-ish person. No—they had a point, and even I could see it now that I thought about it. I really had been on the emotionless side.

Eli continued to wiggle unhappily.

"C'mere, rascal."

Zeke swept my baby out of my arms, raising her tiny body above his head and kissing her belly repeatedly. I hated to admit it but he was really good with her. Better than anyone had possibly imagined.

He looked offended when she kicked him in the face.

Uriah doubled over, laughing. "You just got kicked by a baby, big brother. A baby. Of all things, you get kicked by a baby."

"At least I didn't get pooped on."

"That was once and she was having a bad day."

"She's a baby," Zeke said. "All babies have the bladder control of a clarinet."

I frowned. "Clarinets don't have bladders."

"Bad analogy."

"You think?" Uriah groaned. "The worst analogy."

The bickering continued on until Eli, my one week old savior, kicked Uriah in the face. I was one hundred percent sure it was a coincidence but it was hilarious. Especially since he'd just been making fun of Zeke for getting kicked by a baby again.

Zeke kissed Eli's forehead. "You're on my side, aren't you?"

"What were you saying, Uri?" I asked, trying my hardest not to laugh. "Something about how pathetic it is to get kicked by a baby?"

He glared at me.

Zeke continued to entertain Eli—counting her fingers, tickling her belly, somehow creating an entire story from scratch that wasn't half bad, squeezing her sides and getting her first giggle in return. And he continued until Tris barged into the apartment, having just been at Christina's for an hour, despite only being one week postpartum. I mean, I really didn't get how she wasn't dying to be with Eli.

I certainly was.


Tori walked with me.

Yeah, I had not wanted to go to this meeting today.

Every ounce of my body would have rather stayed home with Eli and her constant diaper changes and feedings. Oh, it would have been so, so much better than dealing with my father and his bullshit. I think he played the dead wife card at least once, which was way too much.

And horribly pathetic.

She wasn't even dead.

Though, of course, he didn't know that and I doubted he ever would. Evelyn seemed to enjoy him thinking she had died. I was fine with it—if he knew she was alive, he'd probably do worse to her than he had to me.

We reached her office.

She sat down first, and then I took a seat across from her.

Unlike any other day, the room smelled like cinnamon and was neat. Very, very neat. It was out of character for Tori's office to smell like anything other than black coffee and look anything close to perfect. I was so used to it that it was like being in an entirely different room.

"I had orders to clean up."

"Ah," I said. "From who?"

"Someone above me. No one gave me any names."

"So you did it?"

"I like my job."

"Hm."

She tucked her black hair behind her ear and started in on today's briefing. While I had been there and all, it was still required that we go back over it. Just in case one of us heard something that the other missed.

So far, being back at work had been a nice change.

I obviously loved being at home with my daughter, able to spend every waking moment of my day with her, but the diaper changes and constant feedings were very.. tiring. However, I knew Tris was probably enjoying the mother-daughter time. She still had a month before she went back to her leader duties. Right now, she was mainly helping with smaller tasks that had been assigned to me.

Tori stopped abruptly.

"Marcus didn't seem very happy," she said. "You know, I think you being at those things makes him mad."

"You know why, Tori."

"I do."

"Then why do you keep asking me?"

"I just wish I knew how a parent could hate their own child for making a decision like that," she said, shrugging. I watched as she flipped the page. "It was beneficial to you in the end."

"I told him I would stay."

Silence.

I mean, so few people knew the truth about my transfer to Dauntless. Most of them had even forgotten that I was a transfer in the first place. Everyone had claimed that I'd been meant for Dauntless since the moment I'd walked into the compound, which I did not think was true. I'd been weak. A coward, really. Eric had seen it immediately—easy prey.

Abnegation had raised me to care for people.

It would have caused my downfall, had it not been for people like Eric. People who taught me how cruel the world truly was outside of Abnegation. Even my father's abuse couldn't have prepared me for that.


Tris & Tobias,

I'm hoping that you've taken me seriously and are, at the very least, considering my request to meet my precious little granddaughter—not that I would know if she's precious, but I can only assume. I'll be sending another note everyday for the next few months. Until you allow me to see her, that is. Please.

Love,

Evelyn

"She's not trying to manipulate us—"

"It's basically a threat, Tris!"

My wife glared at me.

The whole argument over these stupid notes was idiotic, and I was almost completely sure that we both knew that, deep down. Why was my mother able to divide us like this?

"She'll stop if we let her meet Eli, Four."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I think you need to trust her! She's your mother."

"My mother left me in a living hell!" I yelled. "Why do you think she's so trustworthy, Tris? She's only ever been a liar."

"Why are you being so irrational?"

I sat down.

I was being irrational? Are you kidding me? My mother was desperately trying to get her claws on my daughter, who was less than two weeks old. Why was I being labeled as irrational in this situation? I only wanted Eli to be safe.

It was insane.


you know what else is insane?

my posting schedule

so yeah, it's been about a month since i've updated either one of my accounts. and for this, i am very sorry. i was kind of taking a break and focusing on school stuff, like band and homework and grades. i've had two band competitions in the past few weeks, and our marching season is almost over. so maybe i'll have a lot more time for writing soon? i'm hoping so.

thank you for reading, and i love you all so so so much.

please leave any comments or suggestions you have! if you don't feel comfortable reviewing, you can always message me privately!

have a wonderful wonderful day my loves