Her aimless wandering came to a stop.

She collapsed. The murky water hid half her face; mud and filth caked her legs and torso, gluing her to the clammy surface.

Where was she?

She thought she knew, but nothing was clear to her anymore. Nothing except that she had no reason to be alive.

Her sisters were gone.

Mildred had avenged them. She had made their murderers pay.

Death had taken her before the deed was done, but she was sure the knight of thorns had finished the job in her stead.

Or had he?

Maybe he had died too, and the heartless murderers still roamed free, unpunished and unrepentant of all the wrong they had committed against her and her family.

Mildred could feel a festering anger within her, but it was a blurry presence she couldn't wholly comprehend. Her mind was hazy, as if it was still drunk by the numbness of death.

But she wasn't dead anymore.

She was alive.

What for?

She breathed in, swallowing some of the muddy water. She choked violently, but her discomfort didn't feel real.

Why?

A deep cold spread across her body, blooming from her chest, right above her heart.

Why am I still here?

She thought of her sisters, and of the knights that had killed them.

Childishly, Mildred tried to find comfort in imagining a scenario where she killed the two men with her bare hands and then butchered and devoured their corpses.

A perfect revenge, the payback she and her sisters deserved.

If there was something to be felt about that image, it was amiss for Mildred.

In the end, even if she had come out victorious, even if the knight of thorns had kept his word and those other two knights were now burning in the most hellish pit, it didn't matter.

Her sisters were gone. That was a fact no one could change.

Mildred knew better than to fool herself into thinking her sisters had come back to life. They had been Hollowed for far too long, barely holding any semblance of true reason on their minds: they would never come back.

Then why?

Memories, feelings, and reason began to be swallowed by the maddening darkness growing inside her. Mildred had been able to keep it in check in the past, both with the aid of her sisters, the Humanities she stole from the selfish fools that invaded her home and the amusement they offered her when she hunted them down like prey.

She couldn't hold to none of it any longer.

She didn't want to.

Am I... dying?

She had experienced death many times. Yet, something was wrong. No death she had endured before had ever felt like this.

So thick, so cold.

Despite everything, she accepted it.

My sisters. We will see each other soon, and this time, I'll stay forever by your side.

And by accepting it, Mildred never discovered she would have not been able to fight it back had she tried.

The Hollowing consumed her.

In a hidden bonfire nearby, a knight was reborn from its ashes.


"I'm almost done." Domhnall announced.

"Y-yes." Laurentius stood up. It was him who answered on everyone's behalf, as neither Solaire nor Lautrec paid Domhnall no mind. "Thank you."

"I did what I could. Your companions' equipment should be able to resist a few more battles, but I'm a collector, not a blacksmith." Domhnall's voice, which had not been friendly from the start, became bitter and cold when he looked at Solaire and Lautrec. "Be sure to get it properly repaired as soon as your business here is done."

The two knights, each one sitting on opposite sides of the sewer, said nothing in return.

Lautrec didn't even bother to look at Domhnall, too busy playing with his parrying dagger.

Solaire's situation was no different, but it wasn't derision or meanness which motivated his silence. He simply didn't have the energy to do anything else that wasn't sitting down on the cold and damp floor, his eyes fixed on the parrying dagger that had been gifted to him.

A dagger that would see no use now that Oscar was gone.

The thought resonated inside him. Solaire felt its sour effect, but his weariness was too great to allow his grief to manifest again.

He felt trapped in a limbo where numbness and indifference were the only options. They were dull and unpleasant, but also lighter than the lingering feeling of loss.

"I'll let you know once everything's ready." Domhnall stated, annoyed by the lack of a proper answer.

Solaire heard his anger and understood it, but he couldn't bring himself to care about the old collector's mood.

Laurentius drew breath to say something.

In the end, the pyromancer said nothing and returned to Solaire's side. He sat down next to him again.

He irradiated a warmth that reached Solaire, covering him like a soft blanket.

It was a trait common in most pyromancers, but there was a clear intent behind what Laurentius was doing.

Perhaps he thought the feeling would be comforting for Solaire. Deep down, Solaire knew the gesture was good natured and sincere, but it wasn't soothing at all.

To him, it was simply nothing, just a waste of everyone's time.

Not unlike me.

Solaire came close to chuckling, but his tongue remain stuck to his palette, just likes his eyes couldn't look away from the parrying dagger.

Why did we even meet, Oscar?

He traced his fingers along the blunt side of the dagger's blade.

If this was our fate all along, then maybe it would have been better if we hadn't met at all.

Tears stung his eyes. Solaire wiped them away, but the damage was done.

Even amidst his exhaustion, pain began to resurface again.

He couldn't allow that to happen.

A gentle hand on his shoulder offered him a necessary distraction, but not a welcome one.

"It's alright." Laurentius told him in a soft whisper.

The statement enraged Solaire. Not only was it foolish, it was also a lie.

Nothing would truly be alright again, and he knew it.

And so did Laurentius.

There was no need for false comfort.

His anger clashed with his grief, and the collision of both feelings was more than what his mind and body were capable of enduring.

Solaire felt how he slipped back into a quiet indifference.

There was also a tingle in his chest. It was sharp and cold, blooming right above his heart, not too far away from his own Darksign.

He had felt it before, back in Firelink Shrine. If it hadn't been for Oscar, he would have Hollowed there. His journey would have ended before it could truly begin.

Maybe, he thought, it would have been better that way.

Maybe that was how it always should have been.

"Here." Laurentius took a Humanity out from a leather pouch hanging from his waist. He offered it to Solaire. "Use it. It'll make you feel better."

"Aren't you generous." Lautrec intervened, putting his dagger away and staring at the dark essence twitching on Laurentius' palm. "I sure wish you had showed such kindness towards me. I too fought against that monster. Or what? Am I not worthy of some refreshment as well?"

He spoke as if he was offended, but his amusement was evident. Solaire didn't need to look at him to know the mocking expression he was giving Laurentius.

"S-Solaire needs it more than you." Laurentius replied, more defiantly than Lautrec undoubtedly had expected. "I-If you are exhausted or injured, I'll give you some of my Estus, but none of this Humanity."

Without waiting for a reply, Laurentius gently held one of Solaire's metal bracelets. He tried to pull his arm closer to the Humanity, but Solaire resisted. Weakened as he was, his strength easily outmatched Laurentius'.

"Solaire."

"I don't want it."

"But you need it." Laurentius, aware he wouldn't make Solaire's arm budge, tried to pull Solaire's hands down instead, so that his chest would be exposed, and he could infuse him with the Humanity. "Now take it."

"Keep that thing away from me!" Solaire reacted by violently slamming his arm against Laurentius. He hit the pyromancer right under his neck, throwing him down to the floor.

Laurentius's back hit the wet surface of the sewer. He landed clumsily, and it took a moment for him to straighten up again.

The first thing he did afterwards was giving Solaire a desolate and confused gaze. By instinct, Solaire felt the impulse of rushing to his side and help him stand up, and to apologize to him for his despicable behavior.

But he couldn't.

"I—" The word escaped his lips, but it was only followed by a series of shaky gasps. His fingers lost their strength, allowing the dagger to escape from his grip and fall to the floor.

Its soft clinking was the only sound that resonated in the sewer for a long moment.

It felt eternal.

Eventually, the silence was broken by Domhnall. The old collector was walking towards them again, but he was stopped by Laurentius.

The pyromancer raised his free hand, signaling him to stop. Then, he stood up, still carefully holding the Humanity he had offered Solaire.

Reluctantly, Domhnall returned to his usual spot to continue working on Solaire's and Lautrec's equipment, but Solaire still could feel the old man's hidden eyes anchored on him, bitter and resentful for the treatment he was giving Laurentius.

Domhnall hated him, and Solaire couldn't blame him.

Overwhelmed by a hurricane of emotions, Solare tried to pick up his parrying dagger, but he couldn't bring himself to touch it again.

I can't.

With nowhere else to go, Solaire's hands retreated to his face. His fingertips rubbed against the skin of his forehead, pressing so tightly that his knuckles turned as white as bone.

"Well then, I think that settles it." Lautrec's words came after the rustling murmur of his amor. Then, he started walking directly toward Laurentius. "Unlike sun boy over there, I am more than willing to use that little piece of Humanity. Hand it over, pyromancer."

Laurentius took a step back for every step Lautrec took in his direction.

"N-n-no." Even through his stuttering, Laurentius retained a semblance of defiance. "This Humanity is-is-is—"

"You are beyond annoying." Lautrec's voice now rang truly threatening. "And stupid too, if you think I will put up with your impertinence any longer. It was amusing at first, but you've grown far too disrespectful for a swamp rat. I'll have no more of it. Now give me that Humanity, or else I?ll strip it from your corpse."

"Lautrec!" Solaire intervened. It took all his strength, but he knew well how capable Lautrec was of carrying out his threat.

He wouldn't hesitate to attack Domhnall either, if he tried to defend Laurentius.

Neither men deserved a fate so brutal, even less for Solaire's sake.

He couldn't just watch as Lautrec unleashed his savagery upon them.

I couldn't save my best friend. The only true friend I've ever had. What makes me think I can save anyone?

The thought was so discouraging that Solaire felt tempted to end his intervention there and allow fate to unfold before his eyes, but what little courage and Humanity remained in his heart allowed him to carry on.

But my Humanity is not little. I still have a fair share of it... all thanks to you, Oscar.

Guilt had never felt so heavy and real.

"Enough, Lautrec. That Humanity is not mine or yours, it's Laurentius'." Solaire limply raised his head and looked at the pyromancer. He noticed Lautrec's glare, too, but he focused only on Laurentius' distraught eyes. "Use it on yourself. The death the knight of thorns gave you was difficult and brutal. You are the one who needs it most. Besides, my soul still has plenty Humanity left."

"E-enough! Who do you think you are fooling?" Laurentius, for the first time since they had met, looked at Solaire with anger and annoyance. "You're—You're slipping away from us. Do you think I don't notice? Do you think I can't see how close you are to—"

Laurentius clenched his mouth closed, baring his teeth as he struggled to keep his composure.

Lautrec folded his arms. He had an expression on his face that oscillated between curiosity and annoyance.

"You are a good man Solaire, and so was Oscar." Laurentius said.

The sound of that name was like a stab in the gut for Solaire. He knew Oscar was gone, but to hear someone else speaking of him as an entity that no longer existed in the world was almost impossible to bear.

Overwhelmed by his shock, Solaire could only remain frozen where he sat, as if time had stopped for him forever.

"He cared about you, as much as you cared about him. Even I could see it, in the short time the three of us were together. You were proud, selfless knights that had enough generosity in your hearts to worry about each other, and for pathetic strangers like me. You were kind, loyal and brave in ways cowards like me can never be. That's why to see you like this, so broken and uncaring, as if nothing mattered to you anymore...as if you were about to go Hollow—"

Laurentius' tears began to stream down his face. Some of them dripped from the line of his jaw, while others dripped from his chin. The Humanity he was holding trembled together with the rest of his arm.

"It's not fair." There was more anger in Laurentius' voice than there was pain. "Neither of you deserved none of what's happened here. You didn't deserve a useless companion like me. I was too much of a coward to remain by your side when that man-eating woman tricked us. If I had gone with you, then maybe Oscar—"

Laurentius couldn't finish.

Solaire was glad for it. He wouldn't have been able to handle it.

It was horrible enough that, in the deepest corner of his heart, he had thought the same thing when it had been Laurentius who had come back to life and not Oscar. It had been a fleeting dark thought, but a real one as well.

And it wasn't as if Solaire had been discreet about the feeling either. It hadn't been his intention, but his actions and anger had spoken for themselves.

He looked down, trying desperately to think of anything else. When his gaze met the parrying dagger again, still discarded on the floor, he shut his eyes and covered them with a hand.

"It cannot end like this for you, Solaire." Laurentius continued, coherent and clear. "You are a good man. Oscar knew it, and I know it. A courageous Warrior of Sunlight, the man that saved my life. You cannot give up now. You still have a purpose to fulfill."

Laurentius sniffled loudly, scrubbing his face clean with his sleeve.

No one reacted immediately to his words. Even Lautrec, always so eager to use his tongue to inflict a poisonous wound, remained quiet.

The silence allowed Solaire to calm down, but everything Laurentius had said still echoed inside him.

"You are wrong." It amazed Solaire how easy words and his own voice came to him. "About everything regarding me, Laurentius. I am not a good man, nor a courageous Warrior of Sunlight, and neither do I have a clear purpose anymore. I wonder if I ever did."

Solaire shifted his position slightly, finally giving his tense muscles the opportunity to relax.

"Maybe my objectives were firm and clear once, but now everything feels confusing and scattered, as if I was walking a path without direction. I had thought that, perhaps, I could find the purpose I never found in life in this Undead existence. That's why I cursed myself willingly with this blight, but what have I found so far? Nothing, nothing at all."

He made a brief pause, but not because he expected a reply. Solaire merely did so to process the thousands of thoughts that were slowly settling down on his mind.

"To be honest, I don't know what I was expecting to find in this cursed land. Perhaps finding a purpose came second to running away from my old life. Deep down, maybe I always knew that there was nothing of worth to be discovered here. But I did find something. I found Oscar."

A soft smile formed on his lips. Solaire knew that it was treasonous of him to do so now that Oscar was gone, but he couldn't suppress it.

The nostalgic joy he was feeling was too pure to wholly silence it.

"Our friendship was not what either of us was looking for when we came to Lordran. We didn't meet under the best of circumstances, and we didn't always get along. Oscar and I were too different, but slowly, we started to get along. We argued and bickered at times; we said hurtful things, but we always helped each other. We talked, we laughed, we cried, and we continued to travel together no matter what danger we found in our way. And to me, that was enough; to be with someone that cherished me as a friend, someone I could count on and I could learn new things with... that was truly more than enough for me."

Oscar, I once told you that my fate and purpose were mine alone, that they were not yours to claim and live as if they were your own. Yet, I feel that's exactly what I did with you. At times, I feel like my search for my sun become one and the same with the search for your fate as the Chosen Undead.

Tears didn't betray him. Even when his heart hurt if it was about to burst, his eyes refused to express his pain.

Slowly, Solaire picked up his parrying dagger. He held it carefully by the hilt, enclosing it with both hands.

I was always too harsh with you. Forgive me.

"My friend."

It wasn't until he stopped speaking that Solaire realized he was crying again. His own reaction took him off guard.

He had expected that, if he was to weep once more, he would lose control.

But he didn't.

His tears flowed calmly from his eyes, uninterrupted by shaking sobs or violent anger.

Solaire had never been ashamed of shedding tears. Ever since he was a child, crying had often been his only true source of comfort; but this time, it wasn't enough.

It made him feel calmer, but not better.

It was an awful feeling, and he wondered if this was how Oscar had felt after all he had gone through at the Undead Asylum.

If that was the case, then his friend had been strong in ways he couldn't fathom.

"Oscar's death was expected. Better said, it was overdue."

Lautrec said, without the slightest trace of sympathy.

"He had great ambitions, but he didn't have the skill and strength necessary to live up to them. If he is dead, it's simply because he didn't have what it takes to become that ridiculous Chosen Undead you Astorans are so obsessed with. Many fools have died searching the same fate and glory. Oscar was no different from them; he was just another idiot with an unmeasured ego. He should have known better than to delude himself into embarking into this fool's errand. He got what he deserved. End of story."

Solaire couldn't form an argument.

He could barely form a rational thought.

It hurt him that the only emotion that seemed to overcome his grief was hatred, but after Lautrec had dared to talk of Oscar that way, he couldn't control himself.

He would have stood up and charged at Lautrec, blinded by rage, probably sparking a duel that would end in death for either or both of them, if Laurentius hadn't spoken first.

The pyromancer stood in front of Solaire in a protective manner.

The gesture cooled down Solaire's violent fury and replaced with the stacking shame for all he had done to Laurentius.

Even now, he continued to be on his side.

What had Solaire ever done to be worthy of such patience and compassion, he didn't know.

"H-how... H-h-how—"

"What's the matter? Did I upset your cramping tongue?" Lautrec sneered, proud of himself.

"How dare you talk of Oscar that way?" Laurentius said, shaking from head to toe, both from his effort to speak and his indignation. "His motives weren't ridiculous or stupid. He lived and fought for what he thought was right; his dream kept him sane and alive! And he did so without becoming selfish or cruel. Oscar never stopped being true to himself. No Undead that accomplish this is failure in my eyes."

"Yes, very touching. What a shame the opinion of a cowardly pyromancer such as yourself isn't worth a damn."

"What about you, knight of Carim?" Laurentius insisted, visible terrified by Lautrec's potential reaction, but decided to continue confronting him regardless. "What about your reasons? You are in Lordran, just like the rest of us! No one that has ever come to this land willingly has done so because their lives back home were fulfilling or peaceful. Each one of us have our motives to be here, besides the Undead curse, and they are all complicated and dark. You are the same, aren't you?"

The change in Lautrec's expression immediately sent a shiver down Solaire's back.

If Laurentius noticed it, it wasn't enough to make him stop.

"A-a knight of Carim like you, without a lady to look after, surely understands the meaning of loss and despair. Then, how can you be so derisive of others when you—"

Lautrec swung his dagger directly at Laurentius' throat. Solaire, knowing well the attack would happen long before it did, had stood up before Lautrec lunged his weapon forward.

He grabbed Laurentius by the shoulder with one hand and pulled him down. It was brusque maneuver, and Laurentius grunted in pain as he was violently thrown back into the floor, but it also saved his life.

With his other hand, Solaire deflected the weapon by making it clash against his own parrying dagger.

Both blades remained together for a second, sending sparks flying from their brief but poweful contact.

Lautrec was staggered by the impact, but he recovered instantly.

He then tried to attack again, but Solaire managed to grab him by the wrists before he had the chance.

With their arms locked in a struggle, Solaire and Lautrec glared at each other with piercing eyes.

Lautrec's strength was not something to be underestimated, and maybe he would have overpowered Solaire if it wasn't for his own exhaustion.

After some effort, Solaire managed to bring Lautrec's arms down, not without making him release the dagger first by pressing his wrist until it finally gave in.

Once the weapon hit the floor, Solaire kicked it away and violently pushed Lautrec away from him.

The knight of Carim panted heavily, and so did Solaire.

But while Solaire did so out of tiredness, Lautrec's panting was the aftermath of the bout of fury Laurentius had ignited within him.

His nostrils flared; his lips were apart, quivering in a grimace that exposed his teeth in an almost feral manner.

His anger was almost palpable in the air.

Solaire raised his dagger and aimed it at Lautrec.

A fight was the least thing both his mind and body wished for, but Solaire prepared for one regardless. He had to, for the sake of Laurentius and Domhnall.

Oscar. Oscar. Oscar.

He tried to think of something else, but not even the threat of a potential battle could keep Oscar away from his mind.

The initial boost of stamina and energy that had sparked in his entire body after watching Laurentius was in danger started to dissipate.

Solaire shifted one of his legs to a different position in a desperate attempt to keep himself from falling to his knees.

Lautrec, holding tightly his injured wrist, took a step back. His face was crimson, his furrow so frowned that it looked as if the skin of his forehead and temples would tear apart.

"You know nothing." It sounded like the hiss of a viper more than the voice of a man. "My motives are mine alone. They are not something scum like you can understand. If you ever again suggest that you do, I'll flay you alive and hang your bloody corpse for the crows to devour."

The threat was addressed to Laurentius, but Solaire knew it involved everyone present, even Domhnall.

"Don't you dare compare yourselves with me. We are not the same." Lautrec said as he retreated to a distant corner. He stopped for a second and looked over his shoulder. "You know nothing."

His retreat took Solaire by surprise at first, but he quickly realized it had been the smartest move Lautrec could have made.

Weak as he still felt, Solaire could still defeat him in a duel. The broken wrist he had left Lautrec with was proof enough.

There was also Laurentius, who had stood up and remained close to Solaire, right by his side.

Solaire tried to turn his back on the pyromancer, but his legs faltered. Laurentius managed to catch him before he fell completely to the floor.

"Are you alright?" Laurentius asked Solaire as he helped stand on his feet.

Solaire answered only with a nod.

Gently but firmly, he removed his arm from Laurentius' shoulders. Unable to bring himself to look at Laurentius in the eye again, Solaire began to slowly walk away from him.

"Solaire." Laurentius stopped him only with his voice. "This Humanity. Use it, please."

"I wasn't lying to you before. I don't need Humanity."

That's not what I'm missing.

"Use it on yourself, Laurentius. You need it much more than I do."

"T-then at least let's go back to the bonfire. Resting by the fire will help you recover faster, and you can also refill you Estus flask and—"

"No. I'm not going back there."

He could never set foot again in front of the bonfire from which Oscar had never reemerged from.

In silence, Solaire returned to his previous spot without giving Laurentius the chance to reply. He would have ignored him even if he had.

He was about to reach his destination when he caught something with the corner of his eye. Though tired and in dire need for rest, Solaire changed his direction and approached it.

It lay on the floor, forgotten and disdainfully discarded as if it was litter.

Solaire recognized its true worth, and with a carefulness that didn't match his battle-weary hands, he picked it up.

He didn't know how Oscar's tunic had ended up there, but he didn't care.

To have it back after thinking it was lost forever was more than enough for him.

He held it with one hand while he held his parrying dagger with the other.

"Oscar."

His friend's name was little more than a whisper.

It rang softly on his ears before it vanished.


"Oh, my dear lady, do not fret. It's only your knight who's been reborn."

Eingyi's voice was the last thing Kirk wanted to listen now that he had finally returned to life.

He didn't know how long he had remained trapped in death, but somehow, he felt it had been longer than ever before.

Truth was, that his latest death felt strange in a manner of ways.

Finding some Humanity for himself was a priority. It had been a long while since he had last worried about his own mind and soul.

Yet, that wouldn't explain why he remembered it.

Death was not meant to leave any memories of its passing, but Kirk could recall something about his stay in that absolute darkness.

A voice, perhaps two.

One was unknown to him, but the other was familiar.

It belonged to the elite knight of Astora, the same he had defeated and killed.

"Quelaag?" The lady said. "Is that you?"

The Fair Lady's voice anchored Kirk to reality once and for all and restored his earthly duties firmly on his heart.

His memory of death and what he had heard faded from his mind, the same way a dream would have been forgotten after waking up.