Chapter 17: The New Normal and Old Flames

Ezra and Sabine are thankful things seem to be getting better, but they are both still being pursued by others who aren't so willing to give up without a fight.


The sound of approaching footsteps caused Ezra to glance up, checking to see who was coming closer, and a smile grew on his face once he confirmed that it was Sabine. She was wearing her helmet, and that prevented him from seeing her facial expression. But he still had a card to play that others did not. Ezra could sense her Force signature, and from it, he could tell that she had caught him looking, but that wasn't all. He could also see a certain glow about her presence, making him believe there might even be a smile hiding under that helmet. Perhaps even some reddening on her cheeks. Ezra initially thought about teasing her a bit, but if he were to do such a thing, she would only deny it and then make him pay for said teasing later.

While Ezra was sure that he would get some form of enjoyment out of any perceived form of punishment coming from Sabine, it also caused him to think about how they were doing as a couple over the last few weeks. He found it hard to believe how much things had changed from just two weeks ago. Just her simply walking by him was enough to light up his days again. It was almost unfathomable how he went from actively trying to avoid her to this. Or to think that Ezra had even considered breaking things off with Sabine? He even briefly wondered if Sabine hadn't apologized about how she was treating their relationship around others if he ever could have truly gone through with such a thing. Even though Ezra felt miserable at just the consideration of them splitting up, at that time, he felt like there wasn't any other option for them. Until her apology, Sabine had been immovably steadfast in her approach concerning their relationship, but then she surprised him with not only the apology but the sheer conviction in it. Sabine displayed nothing but contrition about how she had handled things and had been willing to return with him to that party if he wanted. Sabine's offer to return with him came with the promise to openly display that they were partaking in a romantic relationship for the entire Chopper Base to see, but Ezra didn't need her to do that. Ezra knew that Sabine wasn't just saying things in an attempted stay of execution. He knew that she meant every word, and all he wanted to do after her declaration was get back to how they had been before all their troubles began. After all, as much as Ezra had been avoiding her, he still desperately missed her. But, even then, Sabine still wanted to show him that she meant what she had said. Sabine vowed that when the next opportunity arose, she would not hesitate. And Sabine didn't have to wait long either. And just two days later, she was able to leave no doubt for anyone within earshot.


~~Flashback~~

It felt good to have some time to spare for combat training again. It seemed like months had passed since they last had that kind of free time for such things, and Hera choosing to give the youngest Ghost crew members a little time to recoup from all the missions they'd been carrying out was well-received by both of them. Somewhat surprisingly, though, Sabine was the one who seemed to be enjoying the downtime the most. Still, everyone knew that her enjoyment was based more on having an opportunity to hone her skills rather than relaxing. In true Mandalorian fashion, the opportunity to improve combat skills was always a positive whenever possible. The sharper the blade, the easier to cut was the mantra that her culture had ingrained into her.

The only downside from her standpoint was that Sabine had recently become hesitant to train with Ezra, and it wasn't through any fault of his. Instead, it fell squarely onto her. Sabine found that she was becoming more easily distracted by him than ever before, and he wasn't doing anything, in particular, to be the cause of that either. It was simply her senses being in overdrive for reasons she had yet to figure out. Sabine first realized this problem when she noticed how much easier it was to pick up Ezra's scent than before. She found that she could catch his scent from a room he'd already vacated. She also noticed there seemed to be electricity coursing through her veins whenever their skin touched. It could even be something as simple as their hands touching, and it would send shockwaves through her system. That had nearly cost her on more than a few occasions when they did spar against each other. Sure, she still was the victor when it came to hand-to-hand combat, but he'd come closer than ever to defeating her each time because of her distracted mind. She was still stubborn and vowed to work on pushing through whatever the cause, but until she determined what it was, she wanted to remain focused on improving her craft. So, she asked Rex to pair her up with other trainees and Rebels looking to hone their skills under the guise of wanting to help them. But Sabine never anticipated having to deal with her current opponent standing across from her.

Gavyn was pacing before her, circling as a predator would their prey, looking for an opportunity to strike. Not wanting to face him, Sabine briefly thought of aggressively taking him down to end the match as soon as possible but knew she had to remain professional. They were both there under the premise of improving, and instantly taking him down wouldn't get her out of sparring with Gavyn. Rex would just restart the match. Besides, she decided it might be a good test for her. If she could manage to stay professional with Gavyn, then maybe it would open the door to handling sparring sessions with Ezra again. After all, they both brought about an emotional response from her. It just happened to be at the opposite ends of the spectrum. So, she huffed and readied herself to take him on with an extreme focus on keeping her emotions in check.

Gavyn, meanwhile, was looking for something other than just attacking. He had wanted to re-establish the dialogue between them that had been absent ever since he allowed his own emotions to get in the way. It had taken quite a bit of time for him to sort everything out, but sort it out he had. Gavyn knew that he'd messed things up badly with Sabine and that slim was an optimistic view at any chance with her, but he still wanted to try. He was still attracted to her, and he had learned long ago that failure was always the outcome if one never tried. Gavyn just needed to be patient and start small. Apologize. The only trick with that up to this point had been getting in two words with her. Before Hera had him reassigned, Sabine had already made it abundantly clear that she was angry with Gavyn, and if not for Rex's helpful intervention in this instance, he might never have found an opening. Until now, Sabine had successfully steered away from any setting where Gavyn could even attempt talking to her. So this was an opportunity he wouldn't allow to slip by.

With that in mind, Gavyn went in for a quick takedown. He attempted to lock Sabine's arm in a hold, intending to force her into submission where they would be very close to each other. And he did manage to latch onto her wrist, but Sabine had correctly assumed what he was attempting and quickly countered her way out of it. Then she immediately followed up with a sharp jab to Gavyn's chest to create a bit of space between them, but Gavyn remained focused on tying her down. He spun around with a sweeping kick that managed to clip Sabine's front leg, throwing her slightly off-balance, but it didn't have enough of an effect for him to do anything else with it before she had already recovered.

Sabine wasn't about to admit it, but she was impressed by the spin kick. It was something new from Gavyn and indicated that he had clearly been practicing quite a bit since they last sparred together. Still, she knew she was far ahead of him in combat experience and knowledge. And that meant she should never really be in any trouble because of someone at his skill level. She just had to keep in mind that he was a better fighter than she anticipated, but just as that thought crossed her mind, Gavyn was pouncing again. Only this time, he led with a feint instead of an actual attack, and she quickly moved to counter, clearly expecting the real thing. She did make contact, but it was more of a glancing blow that barely grazed his jaw. She hadn't realized it until it was too late, but he was the one to anticipate her move instead of the other way around. As soon as Sabine had thrown her counter, Gavyn fell backward and then latched onto her wrist again. This time instead of contorting himself for a submission hold, he used his weight to assist with pulling Sabine to him.

Anyone on Chopper Base knew that Sabine was a strong individual, especially for her size. But even her strength wasn't enough against the combination of her momentum and Gavyn's falling body weight. As a result, Sabine quickly lost her footing, and before she knew it, she was bouncing off of Gavyn's chest as he thudded onto the ground under her. Unfortunately for her, the dual impact of the mat and Sabine landing on top of him wasn't enough to knock the wind out of Gavyn. And because of that, Gavyn was able to maintain his grip on her wrist. Now he had her where he wanted. Sabine knew she was in a precarious position even though she was still on top of Gavyn. He'd played his cards well and had her tied up against him to where she wouldn't be able to do much damage or make an escape. Still not one to give in, Sabine continued to struggle, trying to generate some space, and Gavyn seeing her struggle to find anything, knew his best chance to talk was likely at that very moment.

"You know," he said softly, hoping she would be the only one to hear, "I owe you an apology."

"A little late on that one," Sabine growled as she continued to fight for a better position to throw a punch or an elbow into Gavyn's face.

But Gavin had scouted her well and continued to stay one step ahead of her. He waited and timed her next attempt at freeing herself to use her movement and flip their positions so that he was on top of her. Sabine did manage to wrap her legs around him at the hips so that she maintained some control of the situation, but Gavyn definitely had the upper hand now.

"I know it is," he agreed once they had settled back into a stalemate of sorts, "and I have no excuse for it, but that doesn't make my apology any less sincere."

Sabine managed to latch onto Gavyn's other arm as he pressed his point. With that accomplished, she began planning her next escape. "Okay," she said, biding her time, "you apologized. Mission accomplished."

"Not quite," Gavyn responded as he fought to free his arm from Sabine's grip. "Look, I know I screwed up. I overreacted and let my emotions get the best of me. I didn't take you at your word, and because of that, I broke your trust. I just wanted to say that I know it will be a long road, but I'm going to do everything possible to regain that trust. I'll do whatever it takes to show you how important you are to me."

After hearing Gavyn's excuses for his past actions, Sabine nearly stopped struggling, but something inside her suddenly snapped. She managed to free her other arm from his grip and then promptly slammed her forearm directly into Gavyn's face. The blow caused him to jerk up away from her and created enough separation for her to push him off completely. Before he could clear the water from his eyes, she was already following with a knee to his gut. Then Sabine hip tossed Gavyn back to the ground and ended the fight with her back on top of him.

"You need to back off," she growled as she pressed her arm under his chin. "There was never much chance for anything romantically between you and I before, but now that I AM with Ezra, there's definitely no chance for you. Or for anyone else for that matter."

With that, Sabine ended their sparring session by releasing Gavyn and standing up. It was then that she saw Ezra had been in earshot, eyes widened in shock. There was no doubt that he overheard what she said to Gavyn, and he wasn't the only one who heard it either. One glance around the room made it clear that the rest of the training combatants had heard as well. They were all standing there staring just like Ezra was.


That had been two weeks and a couple of missions ago, and it was easy for Sabine to tell that Ezra had been much happier since then. And even though her happiness wasn't on display for anyone to see, Sabine was admittedly happier too. She'd been in such a good mood lately that simply making eye contact with Ezra even through her helmet visor was was enough to distract her, and in this instance, it caused Sabine to nearly run into an approaching Ketsu.

"Whoa there, Sabine," Ketsu said as she reached out to help steady the nearly tumbling Mandalorian girl. "I would've thought you'd seen me coming from a mile away."

But then Ketsu glanced past Sabine and saw the young Bridger boy, and things suddenly clicked. "Unless you weren't really looking where you were going under that helmet of yours."

"Sorry, Ketsu," Sabine replied as soon as she regained her balance and composure. "I guess I was lost in my thoughts."

Ketsu smiled upon hearing Sabine's excuse. "I'll say," she said before nodding her head in Ezra's direction. "Rumor has it you've been making some personal changes that would better explain things, little sister."

"Word travels fast, I suppose," Sabine grumbled. She was never a fan of gossip, and especially not if it involved her. But she knew that her little outburst in the training area would make the rounds, and Ketsu knowing meant one thing was about to happen.

And Sabine was proven correct when Ketsu started dragging her by the hand back to the Shadow Caster, and presumably, to the kind of privacy Ketsu assumed Sabine would require before she would divulge anything. "So," Ketsu prodded, knowing that Sabine wouldn't just come out with anything.

"So, what?" Sabine responded, trying to play dumb. She did not want to dig into her personal life even if she knew Ketsu would never let it drop.

"How was the Jedi boy wonder?" Ketsu asked, wagging her eyebrows. "Did he use his Jedi powers to satisfy your every carnal craving?"

"No," Sabine called out in disgust. "Gross."

Ketsu snickered and shook her head. "Oh, little sister. If you only knew. Gross is definitely not the word you'd use to describe it."

"I really don't want to hear about that, Ketsu," Sabine responded. "And I certainly don't want any of the gory details that you like to share about your own exploits."

"Fair enough," Ketsu said. "I'll spare you the glorious details of what you're missing out on, but you at least have to tell me how good a kisser your little Jedi boy toy is."

"Well," Sabine started as she started shrinking into herself. Lying about it was out because Ketsu always was able to read her like a book.

"No," Ketsu said in disbelief. "You mean to tell me that you haven't even kissed him yet?"

"I kissed him on the palm of his hand," Sabine responded. Aside from that, it just...hasn't come up,"

"Oh, come on, Sabine," Ketsu said in a voice dripping in disappointment. "Please tell me that the two of you have done something that real couples do."

"I've never been part of an actual couple before, Ketsu," Sabine said, defending herself. "You know that. I wouldn't even know what real couples really do anyways."

"Well, we know that you haven't kissed the Jedi yet or done any of the other extra-curricular activities that you will regret waiting so long to do whenever you do finally dip your toes in," Ketsu said before an idea came to her. "Tell you what. Since the list is obviously shorter, why don't you tell me what you two have done, and we can go from there? Oh, and before you go there, what happened before you officially became a couple doesn't count."

Sabine was quiet as she pondered what Ketsu had said. She knew Ketsu was referring to the undercover mission where she was drugged, but she wouldn't go there anyway. Sabine still had no recollection of what happened then, aside from what Ezra told her. Sabine also knew that they hadn't done much to appease Ketsu's curiosity, and once again, Sabine was never good at lying to Ketsu. Hand holding in public on a few occasions and the hug after her big apology were the only things that came to mind. Sure, she'd allowed him to watch her paint inside her quarters, but Ketsu wasn't looking for that type of information. Ketsu was interested in physical conquests and would just laugh as if it didn't mean a thing. And sure enough, when Sabine finished revealing what little she and Ezra had done as a couple up to that point, Ketsu's laughter was the result.

Unfortunately, Ketsu was also bent over and blocking the only exit. So Sabine had no option other than standing there with her arms crossed in frustration and waiting until Ketsu managed to get control of herself. "This is why I didn't want to talk about this kind of stuff," Sabine huffed.

Ketsu sobered up as best as she could upon hearing her little sister's complaint. "Okay, sorry," she said in an attempt to placate Sabine. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's just that…you've been exclusively dating Ezra for at least a couple of weeks if the rumors around the base are accurate. But knowing you as I do, I'd wager that you've been dating him in secret too. In fact, I'd say since everyone is assuming a couple of weeks, I should probably double that time estimate at a minimum."

Sabine's eyes bulged, but she didn't confirm or deny anything Ketsu said. Still, even though Sabine knew Ketsu was more familiar with her than most, she couldn't believe how Ketsu was able to break down something Sabine had never even tested out before. And Ketsu wasn't even finished with her assessment yet, either.

"So, I'm guessing a little over two months at the least here." Ketsu continued. "And you're telling me that the most you have done together is a kiss on his palm?! And to make matters worse, then you made a poor attempt at throwing yourself at him to compensate for his problem with other guys flirting with you?"

"Yeah," was the only thing Sabine could think of for a response.

"And he didn't take you up on that offer?" Ketsu asked.

"He figured it out just like you did. He knew it was just a way for us to get around the real issue and that I was only offering it because of that," Sabine explained. "Ezra knew it wasn't because I really wanted to or because I was ready."

"So, either you've got yourself a true gentleman in the boy," Ketsu said. "Or maybe the stories of Jedi being celibate isn't just trained into them, but is a side effect of using the Force."

"It's definitely not him being a Jedi," Sabine argued as her first thought went to the paternal member of the Ghost crew and his courting of Hera.

Kanan had done a terrible job of hiding his interest in the Ghost captain. If he even was trying to hide it. Sabine believed that Hera was always the driving force behind any efforts to hide signs of attraction between them, just like Sabine had been with Ezra. Then she thought back to the initial attraction that Ezra openly displayed toward Sabine when he first laid eyes on her.

Meanwhile, Ketsu was internally debating how much further to push Sabine for details behind her conviction about Ezra's gentlemanly status. She already had her little sister in an uncomfortable situation, and there was a fine line with Sabine and how much teasing or prodding she would take before completely clamping down. Ketsu had seen Sabine brush teasing off as well as shutting someone out, and she thoroughly enjoyed the former rather than the latter. "Alright," she conceded. "I'll take your word, but if that isn't the case. If Ezra isn't the celibate type, then you need to ask yourself something. How much longer will the boy be willing to wait? Because Jedi or not, gentleman or not, at the end of the day, he's still a teenaged boy, and teenage boys are all the same when it comes to attraction."

"Meaning what?" Sabine asked.

"All boys are susceptible to temptation, Sabine," Ketsu explained as though it should have been obvious. "Even the noblest ones can falter. My advice would be not to make him wait too long. Otherwise, you risk someone else slipping in with an offer that the little brain inside his shorts won't be able to resist. And the little brain can take complete control for spurts."

With that, Ketsu turned and left with a chuckle, thinking that Bridger would owe her a giant thank you if things worked out the way she believed they would. Sabine would, too, for that matter. Because once Ezra got his first experience with the girl of his dreams, Sabine would have him wrapped around her finger for as long as she wanted.

However, if Ketsu had known about the gauntlet previously laid down before Sabine, she might not have played such a dangerous card. Wini was the proverbial unknown wrench to Ketsu's plans. The girl had already made it abundantly clear that she wasn't giving up on her pursuit of Ezra, and that was precisely where Sabine's mind went to thanks in no small part to Ketsu's words of wisdom. By the time Sabine had her moment to shout out her relationship status to Gavyn and the rest of the base, Wini had already returned to her pilot training regimen on the carrier. She'd already been gone since the morning after that party when Sabine apologized to Ezra, and Sabine wasn't about to ask Ezra to contact Wini through the comms just to drop such a bombshell. It was an improper use of communication channels, and up until a few moments ago, it seemed petty, but now she almost wanted to ask him to do just that.

Sabine was now lamenting on Ezra's decision not to return to that party. If he had wanted to return, then the one sliver of concern currently coursing through Sabine would've been resolved, but that would have meant their evening together wouldn't have happened the way it did. Instead of returning, Ezra left with Sabine, and they enjoyed the rest of the evening with just the two of them. It ended up being the first time Sabine willingly shared her paints or allowed anyone a space on her walls. Of course, Ezra painted his take of a Loth cat, but she had to admit that he did a decent job. The look was simple, but there was some definite talent there that she couldn't deny.

And after that night, things seemed to fall back into place for them. Everything returned to their version normal, which had been comfortable for Sabine. They went back to spending most of their free time together again, but that was about it. They had only returned to normal, and once again, Sabine was left to ponder if normal was good enough. Her confidence had become shaken once again thanks to Ketsu's words.


For the rest of the day, Sabine locked herself away in her room with her paints. She needed the time to think about their future as a couple and when things should move forward in the physical realm. Sabine knew that Ketsu wasn't trying to create problems with her teasing, but Ketsu also wasn't entirely wrong either. At some point, Sabine and Ezra would need to move forward in all aspects of their relationship. The question was when Ezra would want to progress as a couple and if she would be ready too. Would Ezra become impatient with Sabine's reluctance for physical intimacy? She knew his patience would only go so far, and he'd already shown her that he had limits to what he was capable of handling. She wouldn't be able to blame him for wanting more. Growth and new experiences should come with the territory. Change was inevitable, even in relationships. Things change in life, including what you want or need from a partner. The question was, how much time did she have left before Ezra would ask for something like more intimacy between them?

Thoughts like those ran rampant in Sabine's mind. It was affecting her so much that by the late evening, she had hardly painted anything. And that is when a knock on Sabine's door gave her a reprieve from her busy thoughts. Sabine had been sitting there alone, rehashing things over and over again, and she had no answers. In fact, it was only making things worse. So Sabine was initially thankful for the distraction until she opened the door and saw the person she'd been thinking about incessantly over the past few hours standing right before her.

"What is it?" she asked while trying to put on the most uninterested look she could muster.

"Just making sure you were on board before I resorted to comms," Ezra explained. "Hera's getting ready to head up to Sato's ship."

"Did she say how long we should expect to be up there?" Sabine asked. "I didn't think it was our shift to go up today."

"This wasn't scheduled. So Hera doesn't know," Ezra answered. "But she did say something about joining up with Commander Sato for a meeting along with some other Rebel Commanders."

"So, a few hours at the least then," Sabine surmised.

"Probably," Ezra agreed before his chipper expression changed to a look of concern. "Is everything alright?"

Sabine instantly bristled up at Ezra's question. "What made you ask that?"

"Well," Ezra hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck in his trademark tell that he was uncomfortable or nervous. "You've been locked up inside your room for most of the day. I didn't see you at lunch or dinner, and it's been a while since that's happened. Now that I think about it, you haven't done that since our last fight, not that I was keeping track. I mean, I might have been, but not really. Plus, the look on your face just now made me think something was wrong."

Sabine smiled at Ezra's rambling explanation. There were still some times where he returned to the Loth rat she'd first met, and it would likely always bring a smile to her face. "There's nothing to worry about," she said. "I just lost track of time doing some things that I've been putting off for too long."

"Okay, good," Ezra said with relief showing in his body language. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I'll let you get back to it."

And with that, the young Jedi turned and headed toward the cockpit, leaving Sabine in her doorway. He wasn't even out of eyesight before those thoughts began to creep back into Sabine's mind. It almost felt like a whisper coming from her room, and suddenly that area didn't feel as comforting as it always had. She was frustrated with those thoughts because she just didn't have any answers. Sabine couldn't talk to Ezra about it, and if they were traveling off base for a meeting with Command, Hera wouldn't be available either before Sabine would have to spend more time with her boyfriend to keep him from worrying. It was difficult enough before they were dating to keep Ezra from sensing if things were off, and as he'd just proven, it was nearly impossible now that they were a couple. He'd seen from her actions that something was weighing on her mind.

Sabine needed something to do that would pass the time until she could talk to someone she could trust to give good advice from an outside perspective. There were only two people who fit that role with her, and one of those two wasn't helpful in these situations. Ketsu was more about physical exploits for enjoyment, and she was partially responsible for the issue anyway. Besides, Ketsu had never been above using someone for carnal pleasure whenever she was in the mood and always fell back onto her past experiences as if they were the keys to a happy life. But Sabine wasn't like Ketsu in that manner. Sabine had just never been in the mindset of wanting or needing physical forms of pleasure for any reason. She had art and explosives to make her happy.

Then there was Hera, who was the most level-headed person Sabine could think of. Hera also would never press Sabine into talking about something she wasn't comfortable with sharing. Hera had never done that. She just had to wait for Hera to be available, meaning she needed something to do, preferably away from Ezra and apparently, her room where her thoughts would continue to haunt her.

Still standing in her open doorway, an idea finally hit her. They were going to the Command ship, and another Mandalorian was currently residing there. Rau may not be someone she could discuss things with, but he could give her something to do that would keep her mind from running rampant. When she had run into him before, he had unknowingly helped to take her mind off of her relationship troubles. Perhaps going back to him for a couple of games of cu'bikad under the guise of recruiting him into willingly joining the Rebellion would work for her troubled thoughts. After all, it had worked before.


AN: Hey there everyone. I know it's been a while, but I made the mistake of going back through posted chapters and seeing all of my own grammatical and story flow failures. I never like reading my own works for this reason, but I wanted to make sure of a couple of things for this installment. Then...the errors. I honestly don't know how the combination of revising, rewriting over and over, and I still missed so much stuff. I ended up revising chapters 1 through 3 again, hopefully catching everything this time around. I do plan on trying to fix the rest of the chapters as I move forward too, but didn't want to leave everyone with rehashed chapters that you've already all read. So, hopefully, I did catch most of the errors in this chapter, but if not, I did my best and hope that is alright.