Eduardo and Carl were standing in the middle of a baby's bedroom looking proudly at a newly assembled wooden cot, Carl with a screwdriver in his hand and Eduardo with a spirit level in his.

'Well,' said Eduardo, 'we seem to've managed all of that without coming to blows.'

'Hopefully this thing stays together,' said Carl, reaching out and giving the cot an experimental wobble. It seemed firm enough.

'All right, let's put all this stuff away,' said Eduardo, taking Carl's screwdriver and placing it into the open toolbox on the ground, along with his spirit level. 'I'll have to find somewhere to put that spare shelving bracket. I already threw out the broken drill bit, didn't I? Are there any parts left over from the crib?'

'Yeah, there's always something,' said Carl, producing a packet of screws and handing it to Eduardo, who found a spare corner in the toolbox and slipped it in.

Pagan came up to the doorway from the landing outside and looked suspiciously at the cot for a few moments, slowly swinging his tail from side to side. Then he stalked into the room and sniffed one of the cot's legs. Carl looked at him with deep disapproval.

'Aren't you worried that thing'll smother her?' he asked.

'What?' said Eduardo, as he fastened the lid on the toolbox. Then he noticed Pagan, and scowled at Carl. 'His name is Pagan. And don't say things like that, please!'

'Sorry,' said Carl, 'but somebody has to think about this stuff. I'll bet that cat goes to sleep on anything soft and warm, doesn't it? Maybe you should get rid of it.'

'That's not gonna fly, man.'

Eduardo stooped down to stroke Pagan, who started to purr. Carl watched distastefully as the cat continued to fawn and trill until he remembered the cot and returned his attention to it. He gave it another sniff, peered up to the top, then shifted his position as he began measuring a jump. He made a few false starts, jerking his body upwards ever so slightly, then shifting his position again. Eduardo laughed.

'I don't see what's funny,' said Carl.

'That's because you're not a cat person,' said Eduardo.

'You never used to be a cat person.'

'I never used to know any cats. Anyway, it looks like we don't have to worry about him getting in there with Chita.'

Pagan turned round and gave Eduardo a most dignified look. Then he turned back to the cot, measured the distance carefully and finally made a spring. For a moment he teetered on the thin rail at the top of the bars, but before he could fall off on either side, Eduardo swept him into his arms and said, 'Not in there, Pagan.'

'You really think he'll listen to you?' asked Carl.

'Not for a moment,' said Eduardo, carrying Pagan out of the room. 'Would you close the door behind you? Or maybe you shouldn't – maybe that'll just make him more determined to get in.'

'Well,' said Carl, standing in the doorway, 'which is it to be?'

'Leave it open,' Eduardo decided, as he began descending the stairs with his arms still full of Pagan. 'Want some coffee? It's only instant.'

'Sure,' said Carl, following his brother down the stairs. 'Is that everything, then?'

'I think so,' said Eduardo. 'Thanks for helping, man.'

He went into the kitchen and deposited Pagan on the floor. Pagan trotted over to the corner that held his bowl of water and cat-shaped mat, saw that there was no food there, turned to Eduardo and mewed. Eduardo looked at the clock.

'It's four fifteen!' he said admonishingly.

'I know,' said Carl, appearing in the doorway. 'What are you telling me for?'

'I'm not,' said Eduardo. 'I'm telling Pagan.'

Carl rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath as he went to take his seat at the kitchen table. Eduardo started boiling the kettle and getting together mugs, spoons and instant coffee. Pagan mewed again.

'No,' Eduardo said firmly.

'You really like that thing?' said Carl.

'I love him,' said Eduardo.

Carl looked astonished. 'You do not!'

'Yes I do.'

'Why?'

'I really don't know,' said Eduardo, frowning down at Pagan's face, which was looking as hungry as Pagan could make it. 'I don't have a choice, I guess.'

Carl continued to watch as Eduardo made coffee with Pagan mewing round him, circling his legs, sometimes jumping onto the surface and having to be pushed off. When the coffee was made and Eduardo sat down with it at the table, Pagan finally gave up and slunk out of the room.

'Doesn't seem like much of a pet to me,' said Carl. 'He's just take, take, take.'

'A lot of the time he is,' said Eduardo, 'but he's very affectionate when he wants to be.'

'Be honest,' said Carl. 'If anything happened to Kylie – God forbid – would you keep the cat?'

'Yeah, I would,' said Eduardo.

'You would, huh?' Carl said sceptically. 'What if nothing happens to Kylie but it turns out your daughter's allergic?'

'I don't even wanna think about that,' said Eduardo. 'Let's just hope she's not.'

They were silent for a few moments. Eduardo began to look rather awkward, while Carl seemed pensive. Eventually Carl said, 'So that's what you're calling her, huh?'

'What?' said Eduardo. 'Who?'

'Your daughter.'

'You know her name, Carl – she's had it for almost twenty-four hours.'

'Yeah, but... you're shortening it to Chita?'

'Am I?' said Eduardo, thinking. 'I, er... I guess I have been calling her that, yeah.'

'So...' said Carl.

Eduardo frowned over his coffee mug. 'Spit it out, Carlos.'

'Well, so... so you haven't thought about shortening it to... to anything else?'

Eduardo's frown deepened. 'I wish you'd say what you mean.'

Carl frowned as well. 'Why? You obviously think you know what I mean.'

'I do know what you mean.'

'All right then, what do I mean?'

'You mean,' said Eduardo, 'you want to address her as Connie.'

'Not necessarily,' Carl said airily. 'It's just a possibility.'

'Now let's get one thing straight,' said Eduardo. 'You're not gonna address her in any way she don't like – you got me?'

'I wouldn't have anyway,' Carl said defensively. 'But it'll be at least a year or two before we know what she likes. If she wants you to call her Connie, will you?'

'Of course I will. But if she does want me to, it won't be because you've drummed it into her!'

'I'm not gonna drum anything into her!'

'Good,' Eduardo said aggressively. 'If she wants us to call her anything different, she'll tell us. In the meantime, her name's Conchita or Chita. Or querida,' he went on, his tone softening and his features suddenly melting into a sappy smile. 'Or queridita. And sweetie or sweetheart to Kylie.'

'How about honey?' asked Carl.

'Honey?' said Eduardo. 'Sure, if you want.'

The conversation then died suddenly. They sat in silence for a moment or two, until Pagan decided to come back into the room and paw at Eduardo's trouser bottoms.

'I guess I could give him his dinner a couple of hours early,' said Eduardo. 'We're about ready to go to the hospital now, aren't we?'

'Yeah, I guess so,' muttered Carl, as Eduardo stood up and retrieved a tin of cat food from a high cupboard. 'You sure there's nothing else to do here?'

'I'm almost positive. Do you want there to be something else to do?'

'Oh, I don't know. I'm just wondering if Beth really wants me to pick her up from the hospital. She didn't want me to go to the appointment, did she?'

'That's not what it was,' said Eduardo, spooning out cat food. 'You know that – you were there. I said please would you help me finish the stuff around the house because I was desperate, and Beth said she'd be fine without you because it was just gonna be like any other normal, boring antenatal appointment, and you don't even go to all of them anyway.'

'Only when I'm working,' said Carl. 'This was...'

'This was saving your brother's life, man.' Eduardo put down Pagan's food, stroked him briefly and then leaned against the kitchen counter. 'Your niece might've come home to a room with no bed!'

'Well,' said Carl, 'we couldn't have that. You know, you should've gotten started sooner.'

'We only moved in last week!'

'Then you should've bought somewhere sooner.'

'Oh, stop that,' Eduardo said irritably. 'You didn't have to help me, you know – you could've gone to the appointment if you'd really wanted to. I'd have thought this arrangement would be perfect for you, though. Woman have baby, man build home, right?'

Carl scowled at him. 'I never knew you thought I was an actual caveman.'

'You didn't?' said Eduardo, with exaggerated surprise.

Carl nearly got angry, but Eduardo was smiling, so Carl decided to laugh.

'I haven't thought that in years,' said Eduardo. 'Well... months. Look, what's this all about?'

'Nothing,' said Carl. 'It's just... it's supposed to be different this time. When Beth was eight months pregnant with Kevin, I was at home putting together a crib then too, and now he hates me.'

'He doesn't hate you,' said Eduardo. 'Anyway, it's what you do after the baby's born that decides this stuff, and I think you know that.'

'Yeah, I do know that,' said Carl. 'But... what if I screw up again this time?'

'Well, just don't.'

'It's not as easy as that!'

'Maybe it is,' said Eduardo. 'If you really do the best job you know how to do, your kid will never hate you. At least that's what I've been telling myself.'

Carl raised his eyebrows. 'Are you afraid Conchita will hate you?'

'I'm afraid of a lot of things.'

'You'll be all right. Kevin doesn't hate you; why would she?'

'It's a different relationship,' said Eduardo. 'And Kevin doesn't hate you either, I promise.'

'Well,' said Carl, 'maybe not, but he's been so distant with me lately. I've really tried to be supportive about... well, you know...'

Eduardo gave him a look. 'Him being in a same-sex relationship. Yes, I know.'

'Right,' Carl said uncomfortably, 'but I've left it too late. He just doesn't seem comfortable around me, especially when he's with Oscar.'

'And that's why you're procrastinating on going to the hospital?' Eduardo asked.

'Pretty much, yeah,' said Carl.

'Well, that doesn't make any sense. Look, if you keep being supportive of Kevin –'

'I will!'

'Good. If you do, and you give it time, I bet things'll settle down. And it'll be a pretty good start for your little one, seeing you being supportive of his or her brother and his boyfriend.'

'Yeah, well... I guess so.'

'Feeling better now?' Eduardo asked.

'I don't know,' said Carl. 'Kind of... maybe a little.'

'Good,' said Eduardo, 'because I don't see why I should be standing here reassuring you, whose baby hasn't even been born yet, when mine's coming home in... what, like a week?'

'Something like that,' said Carl. 'Plenty of time to finish things around the house if it does turn out there's something you forgot. You sure know how to use a drill, don't you? Why did I ever have any problems with you as a kid? At least you liked girls. I mean... I could understand that.'

'There was a lot about me you couldn't understand,' said Eduardo. 'If only you'd known where I'd end up: in a nice house, with a cat and everything, putting together furniture for my nuclear family.'

'Nuclear family, huh?' said Carl. 'Are you gonna marry that girl?'

Eduardo closed his eyes and counted to ten, then bundled the coffee stuff into the dishwasher and said, 'Let's get to the hospital.'


Kylie was sitting cross-legged in the middle of her hospital bed, watching Beth as she walked Conchita up and down the room, burbling nonsense at her and supporting the tiny body on her eight-month baby bump.

'You look so confident carrying her around,' said Kylie.

Beth looked at her. 'You're not afraid you'll drop her, are you?'

'Kinda,' said Kylie. 'Weren't you afraid you'd drop Kevin when he was new?'

'Maybe – can't remember,' said Beth, looking adoringly down at Conchita. 'Don't worry, Kylie, you'll soon get into the swing of things. Especially when you're out of here and no one's fussing around you.'

'When I'm on my own, you mean. You will help me, Beth, won't you?'

'How many times do I have to tell you? Yes! Whenever you feel you need me, all you have to do is call – morning, noon or night. You know that.'

'Even when you have your own baby to take care of?'

'Of course! I'll tell you what: try not to need me when I'm actually in labour, and I won't begrudge you any other time, okay?'

'Thanks,' said Kylie, smiling at her. 'Anyway, I'm going to try not to need you all that much. I just feel safer knowing the offer's there.'

'You won't need my help by the time my little one arrives, anyway,' said Beth.

'We'll see. Are you nervous?'

'Of course.'

'Even though you've done it all before?'

'It was a long time ago. Things are even more different now than I imagined, and goodness knows what else will turn out to be not like I expected. I still can't believe they're letting you go so soon!'

'Well, you should,' said Kylie. 'Women are built to have babies. I'd go home right now if they'd let me.'

'You want to go home right now, don't you?' Beth said knowingly.

'Yes,' said Kylie, 'if there's not too much left to do to the house.'

'I'll bet you were standing on the kitchen counter hanging window blinds right up until you went into labour, weren't you?' said Beth, looking at her with something like envy.

'Not quite,' said Kylie. 'Don't forget, I went into labour at six o'clock in the morning.'

It was at this point that Eduardo and Carl arrived. Carl hovered near the doorway while Eduardo strode into the room, beaming and saying, 'Look, all my favourite girls are here!'

Beth smiled at him and handed him Conchita, whereupon he began speaking to her in a stream of Spanish. Carl looked at him disapprovingly for a moment, then took a step towards Beth and said, 'Everything all right?'

'Of course,' said Beth. 'Both me and the baby are still perfectly healthy.'

'Good,' said Carl. 'So... do you want to go home?'

Eduardo looked up. 'Saluda a Conchita antes de irte,' he said, and thrust his daughter towards Carl.

'Um... okay,' said Carl, taking Conchita, then smiling down at her. 'Hi, honey. Do you remember who I am? I'm your Uncle Carl.'

'Háblale en espa?ol,' said Eduardo.

'She's too young for it to make a difference,' said Carl.

'Qué mierda,' said Eduardo.

Carl looked horrified. 'Don't say that in front of her!'

'You said she was too young.'

'You implied she wasn't!'

'Oh, come on, Carl,' said Kylie, exchanging a comical look with Beth. 'Let's hear it in Spanish.'

'Oh... all right, fine,' Carl said grudgingly. Then he looked at Conchita. 'Sabes quién soy? Soy tu tío Carl. Oh,' as Conchita started grizzling. 'Kylie, she wants something.'

'She's probably hungry,' said Kylie, and held out her arms. 'Give her to me.'

Carl crossed the room and handed the baby to Kylie, who immediately began unbuttoning her top. By the time she was unhooking her front-fastening bra, Carl had turned and fled from the room. Kylie and Beth both laughed.

'Bye, you guys,' said Beth, smiling at the little family as she departed. 'I'll see you soon.'

Conchita settled down to her meal and Eduardo seated himself on the bed, where he watched dotingly over Kylie's shoulder for some moments. Then he said, 'We got the house finished.'

'That's good,' said Kylie, 'because we're taking her home tomorrow.'

Eduardo's eyes widened. 'Tomorrow? Dios m?o! They kept Beth in the hospital with Kevin for like a week!'

'That was seventeen years ago, sweetie. Since then, someone's realised that mothers and babies are fine after an uncomplicated vaginal delivery.'

'I wish you'd say "vaginal delivery" in front of Carlos.'

Kylie giggled. 'All right, I will. So, everything's really done? The dust sheets are off? The shelves are up? The self-assembly furniture's assembled? The drawers and cupboards are filled with all the stuff we'll need?'

'Yes.'

'Are you sure?'

'Pretty sure.'

'Fantastic. Judy!' Kylie called, holding Conchita on one arm as she beckoned urgently to someone she had seen out in the corridor. A young nurse entered the room and smiled inquiringly at Kylie, who said, 'Please can we go home today, Judy?'

Eduardo looked horrified.

'Today?' said Judy. 'Well, I won't promise anything, but it could happen if I can get a doctor to come and check you both over.'

'You know a doctor won't find anything wrong,' said Kylie.

'Probably,' said Judy, 'but there are no guarantees, and you don't want me disciplined, do you? I'll get someone in here as soon as I can.'

Judy smiled at them and walked off down the corridor.

'Today?' Eduardo said shrilly. 'You mean today as in... today? But... but that's today!'

Kylie swivelled her head to look at him and asked, 'What's wrong with today?'

'It's so soon!'

'Not that much sooner than tomorrow, sweetie.'

'I know, but... but... that'd be double the time she's been here already! It'd be another day to practise! As soon as we take her out of here, there's nobody to help us if anything goes wrong!'

'Like what?' asked Kylie.

'Like all kinds of things!' said Eduardo. 'Like if you get an infection because it turns out half the placenta's still in there, or if Chita suddenly gets jaundice or something, or if Pagan... I mean... well, he might not like her.'

'Eduardo, sweetie, what on earth have you been reading?'

'Oh... I don't even remember.'

'Babe, listen,' said Kylie, reaching behind her for his hand, 'I'm scared too. But even more than that, I've had enough of this hospital. Anyway, it'll be good for us... rip off the band-aid and everything.'

Eduardo went on looking worried for a moment or two. Then he smiled, leaned his chin on Kylie's shoulder and said, 'It'll be good to get her home.'


When they arrived home, the light was dim and they both looked tired. Eduardo was carrying a collection of enormous bags, which he immediately took upstairs, while Kylie carried Conchita through to the living room and sat down with her on the sofa.

'This is your home, sweetheart,' Kylie said softly, 'and we're going to do everything we can to make sure you're very, very happy here.'

Pagan entered the room and trotted over to Kylie. He was about to jump onto her lap, but stopped abruptly when he saw that there was an obstruction. Eduardo appeared in the doorway and watched, looking rather anxious, as Pagan rose up on his hind legs and sniffed suspiciously at Conchita. Then, very tentatively, he jumped onto the arm of the sofa. He stared at Conchita for a moment, then leaned towards her and sniffed at her head.

'Hey, Pagan,' said Kylie, reaching across to stroke him with her free hand. 'This is what I was doing while I was away. Her name is Conchita, and in this house, we love her more than anything. She is very, very precious. We don't scratch her, do we? Not even in fun.'

'Meow,' said Pagan, staring at Conchita. Then he leaned in further and began to lick her bald head. She wriggled and snuffled once, then lay quietly as he went on licking her.

'Oh my God – that's so cute I think I'm gonna die,' Eduardo said from the doorway.

'I think I actually am going to cry,' said Kylie, and she sounded like she meant it. 'This mustn't make us complacent, though, babe. We'll have to remember to watch them carefully together, and make sure he's shut out of her room while she's sleeping.'

'Right. I... guess she'll be okay in there with the door closed.'

'She'll be fine. You set up the baby monitor, right?'

'Oh shit – I knew I'd forget something!' said Eduardo, and he turned and went tearing up the stairs.