I'm so sorry for this irregular upload schedule and massive delay. Thank you to MickeyRaider, Cyanide-Princess, and random girl49583 for putting my story in your favourites. I'll try and be more reliable with uploads, but it can't be helped. As always, do support me by writing a review or anything like that. I've also hit over 250 views on the story TOTAL! Thank you SO MUCH to all of you readers for reading my work! With that, it's time to get back to the story…

"Relax kid, I just want to talk to you", the skull murmured.

"You're a SKELETON!", Richard wheezed.

"I get that a lot you wouldn't be-"

"How is this possible?"

"Magic."

"How doesn't everyone in the world know?"

"Magic."

"How do you talk?"

"Magic."

"How do you eat? And if you say magic one more time I'll -"

"Mag- oh actually I don't."

"You're irritating."

"I know."

His teeth-lined jaw glistened in what could only be caught as a fleeting grin. The two pockets of void almost sparkled with mischievous flames as Richard stared back. Now properly observing the skeleton, he could see the faint cracks that snuck their way down his jaw and forehead, telling of past battles and wars fought. Although his physical face, if he could call it that, didn't have any features that could express themselves, but the way he stood almost blossomed with a kind of self-confidence that wasn't nave or arrogant, but earned. Even as the skeleton stared right back at him, in all its lifelessness, Richard could say that it was anything but. From a comical jet-black fedora to the polished leather oxford shoes there wasn't anything to scoff at: a crisp and ironed three-piece suit seemed to fit him from any and every angle like a suit of armour from the Kingsmen movies. An odd, but remarkable feature was a neatly etched skull on the middle of his spotless tie as if it were mocking death itself. Something like that wouldn't be mass sold- so Richard reasoned that his tailor knew he was a skeleton and had a keen sense of humour too.

"Come on- ", the skeleton started.

"Yeah no I'm good", Richard retorted, "this is the part where you invite me to a SPECIAL x-men type club and tell me I'm special or my blood's special or I'm the chosen one right? Right? Because now is NOT the time for that."

"Well actually no. But before that, let's get introductions out of the way. I'm Skulduggery Pleasant."

The skeleton put out his hand and Richard shook it. The hand felt very much like a skeleton's hands under his gloves and had an almost hostile, cold surface to them. But in no way did it feel brittle or unfriendly, but rather like shaking the hand of a long-forgotten friend.

"You letting go?"

"Oh yeah sorry, I'm Richard Brooks."