Your Smile in August

Loyalty


It was a one-hour drive, Kenshin found out ten minutes into the trip, and in twenty the woman beside him already fell asleep.

Hands tucked in her lap, head resting a little to the car window, she had folded into herself so as not to bother anyone else, in case she fell into a nap.

Her breathing was soft and quiet.

"Heard that Miss Kamiya's meeting didn't end until 2 am," Sanosuke said from the third row, voice lowered so as not to disturb the woman seated beside him: Megumi had her attention outside the window, noise-canceling headphones over her ears. To his other side was Sojiro with his laptop, a spreadsheet on his screen, too absorbed on his work to be bothered. "Surprised to see her show up so early this morning."

There was only silence.

He waited for an answer from Kenshin, but there was none. "Hey, you asleep?" Sanosuke leaned forward, attempting a peek at the redhead who sat unmoving in front of him. "Oi, Kenshi—"

Sagara stopped.

The brown-haired journalist flopped back to his seat, suppressing a lopsided grin on his face.

He chuckled.

Megumi turned towards him and raised a brow in question, and the man leaned towards her, lifted the side of her headphones, and whispered, so low that no one else could hear:

"He must have reached the part where high school Kaoru shows her feelings for him."

A sly grin stole Takani's lips. Sanosuke put the headphones back, and she settled her attention back to the passing view on the window, her smile never fading.


*September 10

He is a busy man, barely even has the time to eat. He does not need to worry, though, because his fangirls bring him a lot of bento for lunch.

I'm surprised he has not gained weight from all the food. It's as if he's a shrine god with offerings thrown at his feet!

I thought of doing that once, (giving him food), but certain issues need to be considered:

1. I don't know how to cook.

2. The last time I gave him food, it ended up in a disaster.

Now that I know that I like him, I have made a resolve to myself that the only times I will bother him with my feelings is during confession season, when the Sakura blooms and other girls try their luck, too.

It will be up to him if he acknowledges my feelings or not,

But for all other times, I will stand by him as a friend,

Because that's what he is to me.*

Looking back, he would have realized that she would only present herself and her heart on the seasons when the sakura would bloom.

Yet he had already prejudged every other times he came across her, as rare as they already were.

Kenshin quietly stole a glance. Her breathing was soft and quiet, the rise and fall of her chest, calm peaceful as it was, almost lulled him to sleep.

Outside the rush of scenery was being blurred by the light patter of rain,

Spring rain,

He recalled fondly, his mind trapped in the memory of her entries.

Random dates, flying by in his head,

*July 12

It was raining heavily when I emerged from Kendo practice, Sensei let us go late. Normally when this happens, we would be the only ones left in school, and since I had to walk to the train station (that is where the driver always picks me up), I took my folding umbrella out of my bag to start my way out.

I passed by an occupied classroom. The lights were on and everything.

No one usually stayed that late, and so curiosity got the best of me. I took a peek and was surprised to find Himura-senpai alone, working behind stacks and stacks of paper.

He looked exhausted.

His worried glance carried on outside the window, as he looked at the pouring rain. Judging from the looks of it, he didn't have an umbrella. (Probably still over those little kittens he tried to shelter a week ago.)

He doesn't have to be bothered.

I quietly walked away, but I left my umbrella for him by the classroom's door, so he may find it the moment he stepped out.

Hope he used it.

I did get wet, was soaked when my guardians picked me up. But it's okay, I don't mind. My friends getting ill is the last thing I want to happen.*

He remembered that little incident,

Over that clear folding umbrella was a piece of paper with his name, hastily scribbled over. An indication that the mysterious item was left for him.

Of all the people...

*May 23

Slipped a note in his locker.

No, it's not a letter of confession. I'm sure he gets a lot of that from other girls, and I promised I'd only do that during the proper times. (Which is literally once a year.)

I do not watch him round the clock or follow him around like others do, because that would just be crazy, plus I have a lot going on in my life, too.

Diary, it's only a letter to tell him he is an awesome president, and how the school is a better place with his leadership.

I signed it off as anonymous.

He's been looking winded with all his responsibilities, I hope that letter made his day. He deserves a pat on the back, for being an amazing person to everyone.*

In hindsight, all of her attempts to help him out had not been creepy at all... it had been, by all accounts, innocent, and it would all have been what a real friend would have done, anyway.

* April 5

Today I did the impossible. I was able to convince the members of my tough, no-nonsense Kendo team to wear loli-maid outfits! After much groaning from the guys and violent reactions from the girls, I was able to trap 'em with my charms.

I told them it was the quickest way to fundraise, and we would be swamped, the moment we open shop.

It's the school's annual sports fest, diary,

And each club is trying to fundraise. The one who raises the highest pool wins.

All the proceeds raised by the different clubs go to the winner's charity of choice.

Isn't this just brilliant? This is, of course, President Himura's idea.

According to the announcements, his charity is the Children Safehaven. He doesn't know this, but I registered the team's charity (with their approval, of course,) to be the same, too.

In that way, this doubles Himura-senpai's chances of winning. If in case they lose, the Kendo team has his back.

I'm pretty sure we'll secure a win for his charity, diary. Our tickets are already sold out for the first hour! *

He watched her with the corner of his eyes, quietly observing the tilt of her lips, the fall of her hair on her face,

He recalled her bright smile when she received him this morning,

And how much of an effort that would have probably taken, now knowing that she only had three hours of sleep.

You tucked yourself in the shadows,

Never wanting to be a bother to me...

Her phone rang, startling them both. Flustered she forced her eyes open, and she answered the call. It sounded like an overseas business matter, the terms used were not to his understanding.

At this point,

How could I even thank you?

I don't know where to begin.

She put her phone down and turned to him, apologizing.

He smiled, told her not to.

All the while, in the back of his mind, thinking:

Behind the layers of smiles and acceptance,

That same girl once held constant bruises on her skin for his sake.


*November 13

Ue-sama just had to stay bedside the entire time I was at the hospital. I couldn't just grab my diary and start writing.

Only now that I am finally discharged and in my own room did I get the chance to.

Got a cast on my left hand which is my writing hand. But I am ambidextrous, so I am still able to write. (I'm sorry if my penmanship is a little off.)

Diary, how do I even start this?

Yes, I've been used to seeing constant bruises on my skin already, but I can hide it, or lie my way out. But out of all the incidents, this one turned out so bad that it would probably top all the bruises the whole two years combined. Diary, this one takes the cake.

It's the phenomenon that will forever be memorialized by my guardians as "The Incident in the Snowstorm," or, as Ue-sama likes to rephrase, "My Beloved Nakimushi at the Peak of Her Stupidity."*


"We're here," Aoshi said from the driver's seat, and Misao on the passenger's side yawned and stretched like a cat.

"Uh-oh," she said, blinking. "Kaoru, looks like someone is—"

Before she could even finish, the door to Kaoru's side swung open.

"Why are you two hours late?!"

Kaoru laughed nervously. A rather beautiful woman was standing by the door, hands on her hips, a condescending look on her face. The woman was clad in an elaborate kimono. Had it not been for her cross look. Kenshin would have whipped out his camera and asked for a photo.

"I guess I'll see you guys after the ceremony," Kaoru waved, and before anyone else could protest, she was whisked away.

Kenshin blinked. "What just happened?"

"That was Yumi, one of Kaoru's guardians." Aoshi helpfully supplied. "Her Arts and Etiquette Mentor."

"Ah," the redhead nodded, finally able to put a face to one of the names she was so fond of in her diary.

"So, we ready?" Aoshi turned around, and he gave him a mysterious grin.

The redhead fell silent, taken aback by the usually stoic man's enthusiasm. It was followed by Misao's confident wink, as they both turned away and exited the car.

"Get your camera ready," Sojiro braced his arms playfully on Kenshin's shoulder, and he nudged him outside.

The photojournalist stepped out of the car, shaking his head in humor. Infected from their childish anticipation, Kenshin finally faced the scene before him.

He had to suck his breath in, the moment he saw what was in front of him.


Hundreds of Koinobori, flapping in the wind, swimming against the playful breeze. People in traditional kimono, even the little children! The rustle of the pink peach trees, the sound of endless windchimes, singing their wishes to the smiling gods.

Around him the stalls were turning on their string lights, welcoming the setting sun.

Everything was tinged with gold, everyone's faces reflected a smile.

The distant rhythm of the Taiko was calling out from afar. He brought his gaze towards the source of the mesmerizing sound. At a little distance were the Torii gates, ancient sentinels that stood the test of time, and beyond that was the immensely large, breathtakingly magnificent Shrine.

This was a photographer's dream.

Kenshin raised his camera and rapidly fired. The setting was breathtaking. The lighting was perfect, the people were friendly.

He did not notice how much time passed by, because the next thing he knew, Sanosuke was dragging him to an unknown location.

"But—" he protested, yet the man cut him off with an impatient "Tsk!"

"You've been taking pictures for an hour now!" Sanosuke scoffed.


He was brought into what seemed like a clothing stall that held traditional garments. Sagara shoved him into one of the dressing rooms, threw a curious paper bag into his hands, and closed the curtain.

"Hurry," he said, tapping his feet, "They've got an hour until the sun completely sets. They'll be starting pretty soon!"

"Who?" He asked, but he only got an exhausted sigh from his friend. Kenshin shrugged, hastily donning what he realized was a men's yukata. "Hey, Sano..." he started carefully.

"What?"

"Why didn't you tell me... that you knew these people all along...?"

Silence. Kenshin tied the last binds to his hakama, all the while waiting for an answer. As he was about to clear his throat and rephrase,

"I never said I didn't know them." Sanosuke finally answered.

True,

The redhead thought.

And he did mention that he worked with them, too.

"And I'm sorry to have kept this from you. I just thought that you were the best person for the project, that's all. But knowing you and how you saw the group, I was pretty sure you'd decline the job."

Another bout of silence. But this time, it was Kenshin who broke the quiet.

"Thank you, though."

"Huh?"

"Thank you. For kind of forcing me into this."


* The day already started gloomily. That morning, I heard Himura-senpai had fancied this senior from high school.

I didn't catch her name, but I think I know her.

Anyway, she was supposed to be this pageant queen. A perfect Yamato Nadeshiko, not a hair out of place, was praised for her beauty and poise. Soft-spoken, fragile, graceful.

In short, everything else I'm not.

I hide under fake glasses and pigtails, so as not to draw attention to myself.

I wear my school jacket and have to keep my skirt ankle length, to hide these unsightly bruises that come constantly from challenges and ambush attacks.

Although I can clean up pretty nicely, I have to maintain this strong image in school,

if I am to protect my friends from constant physical threats.

Diary, back to the point.

As I was walking home I was thinking, should I give up as early as now?

But then I thought,

Ridiculous.

She is not yet his official girlfriend, and I will not lose hope. I repeat to myself: until that happens I will not lose hope.

Through all these years, I have always pushed myself aside for the sake of others. I don't show my tears, because I don't want them to worry. I don't demand anything from my friends, because they have their own problems they have to deal with, and I try to help them as much as I could.

I have never wished so hard for anything, never in my life, not until now.

I wish, diary, for Himura-senpai's acceptance.

Is it selfish to ask for one thing, just this one thing, from the heavens? Sometimes when I pray in the Shrine I am tempted to do so with contempt. This one thing that I want, the only thing I want in my whole life, yet it continues to evade me.

I found myself tearing up again, and I watch the frozen wonderland around me. It looks like a snowstorm was brewing in the distant sky.

And I realized, another year has passed, yet here I am, still an invisible friend.

I was about to cry again, (seeing that I was alone,) until something caught my attention.

From where I stood, I saw a group of boys, following a girl from a distance. The girl is really pretty, I thought, but then I froze when I realized who she was.

Himura-senpai's crush.

I did not doubt myself, though, for I knew immediately what to do. Diary, I may not be as pretty as Himura-senpai's crush, I may not be as fragile-looking. But I know damn well about one thing:

I am myself, and the only thing I can do is be the best of myself at all times.

I approached those hoodlums and I called them out, catching their attention. This allowed the girl to slip away, unaware.*


They were out of breath. Partly from running the thousand steps, partly from laughing, as Sojiro released a barrage of curses, complaining of how slow they were, and Sanosuke almost fainted from carrying a vain Megumi all the way up, (she was afraid it would ruin her kimono).

The redhead laughed, as Misao kept on making fun of herself and the clacking of her geta, doing an impromptu tap dance.

It had been so long since he felt this way...

The small woman suddenly gasped. "Look!"

All eyes were to the Kagura-den. A heavy crowd was filling in, and the group charged towards the mass.

"What are we watching?" Kenshin said, pushing through the crowd.

"You got your camera?!" Sanosuke asked instead. "You need to be front row to get good pictures of this!" Kenshin nodded, and with one collective group effort, the friends heaved him off the ground, and they literally tossed him, propelling him forcefully to the front.

He almost fell into the river that separated the Kagura-den from the crowd. Dazed, Kenshin looked back, and the group waved happily a distance from him, content at where they were.

He laughed, shaking his head in disbelief. He then brought his attention back to the ceremony before him.

On the backdrop of the Kagura-den was a life-sized, five-tiered Hina Stage. The guests exclaimed in amazement, and they marveled at the intricate presentation, from the detail of the doll's hair, the elaborate, luxurious kimonos, to their human-like expressions.

Special attention was given to the top tier, where the Tono and Hime sat. The Lord was dashing, yet the beauty of the female doll beside him was incomparable.

Flowers and bells on her flowing, black hair,

Soulful blue eyes and a wistful smile,

She looked ethereal, she was unreal.

Suddenly, one of the dolls blinked.

It took Kenshin aback.

He realized, the other "dolls" had been breathing, too... and it dawned on him, he almost slapped his forehead for being so dense:

They were not dolls,

They were people, dressed as dolls:

And the beautiful Hime,

The one everyone sang praises for her beauty,

was none other than his spitfire Kaoru.


* I may not be as pretty as Himura-senpai's crush, I may not be as fragile-looking. But I know damn well about one thing:

I am myself, and the only thing I can do is be the best of myself at all times.

I approached those hoodlums and I called them out, catching their attention. This allowed the girl to slip away, unaware.

They held an angry look to them at first, their plans were thwarted after all, but then the angry look turned to confusion, and then it turned into realization, when it dawned on them as to who I was.

There was a short scuffle, and I thought I was winning.

I assumed wrong. The next thing I knew someone snuck up behind me, and they put a plastic bag over my head.

I couldn't breathe.

Everything else turned dark. I passed out.

Diary, when I woke up, I found myself in an abandoned storage room, hands on my back, and tied to a pillar, restraining any possible movement.

They did not gag my mouth, because their leader had something to tell me, and he needed an answer. (One thing I was thankful for, though, was the fact that they didn't take advantage of my being a girl. I think they found me unappealing, my zero sex-appeal disguise paid off!)

They admitted that yes, they initially planned to take Yukishiro-san, (so that was her name?) and hold her as ransom, to lure Himura-senpai into this godawful place and beat him up. But since they had me, their plans changed.

He demanded that I switch loyalties.

Why are you even protecting him? He asks. Side with me. He doesn't even appreciate you, he doesn't know you exist.

I remained defiant.

And he told me, the main reason why the President was so untouchable, why no one dared to oppose him, it was because of me, the Princess of Oniwaban.

At first he tried to lure me with incentives. But I would not yield.

It was then that his group started beating me up.

Those bastards bashed my face. They used my arms as ashtrays, putting out their lit cigarettes on my skin.

They made a punching bag out of my ribs, and they socked me until I coughed out blood.

They thought they could break me into submission.

Diary, I didn't know how long I was in there.

All I know is that there came a time where they released me from my binds, and I was a bloody mess on the floor. Still, I tried to fight.

When I saw the metal baseball bats on their hands, I merely closed my eyes.

It's surreal to hear your bones finally crack, and you realize that the warmth that had spread over you was your own pool of blood. I felt that I was in a film, except in that film, you felt every single blow.

I detached myself bitterly from my body, and the only thought that held my will together, the only memory that comforted me during that time was my friend's promise, and his smile that August night at the Obon festival.

For so long he had been a source of my happiness, so I held on to the memory of his smile like a lifeline.

The world became dark again, and then, I woke up.

Everything was finally quiet. *


The upbeat of the taiko was replaced with a steadier rhythm, and the Lord and Princess stood up and started to descend the tier. The Court Ladies followed, aiding the Hime with her elaborate twelve-layered kimono. The musicians then followed, then the Ministers, and finally the Protectors.

They handed the Tono and Hime a pair of paper dolls, and the Imperial Couple stepped before the banks of the slow-flowing stream.

With practiced fluidity, they knelt, and with graceful hands they reached out, settling the dolls on the surface of the water.

They let go, and the crowd watched as the paper dolls floated peacefully away.

The crowd exploded into applause.

Kenshin had not stopped taking pictures, mesmerized by the blissful ceremony.

The men of the Hina Stage fell back to their positions, but the women remained in the middle of Kagura-den. They had been handed branches of peach blossoms from the shrine assistants, the Hime holding the most beautiful branch.

The Taiko suddenly picked up a slow, rhythmic beat, and the male musicians on the Hina-stage picked up their instruments and started playing. The distinct, calming sound of shamisen and the interspersed, capricious notes of the flute silenced the enthralled crowd,

And then the beautiful Hime-doll, flanked by her Court Ladies, started to dance in a fluid rhythm.


* They probably thought I was dead, so they left me, cowering from the consequences. Diary, I thought I was dead myself. It was only when I tried to move was when I realized I wasn't: the pain on my battered body was like no other.

I tried to walk, but with broken ribs and beaten limbs, you realize one couldn't get too far. Yet if I stayed, I would probably bleed to death.

I gathered the last of my strength and crawled my way out.

What met me outside made my bones literally shiver. Night had fallen, and it was, probably, one of the strongest snowstorms of the season. My teeth were chattering, from the blood loss and the blast of the icy, unforgiving wind. Still crawling like a miserable worm, I dragged my body through the snow.

My goal was to at least reach the road, in hopes that someone would find me. But I was already too weak, and my limbs

already felt numb.

I started to convulse.

My body couldn't take the cold, it was shutting down

Diary, I laid there, crying my heart out.

I realized I couldn't fight anymore.

It would probably take days for them to find my body because it would be buried by inches and inches of snow.

I closed my eyes and accepted my fate. Images flashed in my mind... of my mother pointing the gun into her mouth, of my father teaching me the proper technique of bashing a wooden sword,

The disappointed sighs of my guardians, Ue-sama's sarcastic laughter,

And my friend's smile...

I felt a warmth like no other.

I reveled in that warmth for long moments, until I realized, the warmth was a physical one. My eyes snapped open. In the middle of the snowstorm I squinted, because I could not comprehend.

Someone was holding me,

Very tight I could not breathe.

I have never been held like this for so long. The last time this happened, was when father embraced me for the last time, as our boat was being engulfed by flames, years and years ago.

I opened my eyes, and I was genuinely shocked.

The arms that were holding me were Ue-sama's. "Shit, fuck, stupid girl!" I could hear him cursing despite the howl of the wind, as he crushed me into his arms. He took off his parka, leaving him with zero insulation, wrapped it around me. Then with clenched teeth from the cold, he lifted me off the snow. I could feel his muscles harden as the bite of the snowstorm was beating his body, but he dug his feet into inches of slush, and trudged against the violet snowstorm, all the while shielding me from the wind.

I would learn later in the emergency department, that he was the one who insisted on finding me when I did not come home. He went out of the house to look for me, even though it was midnight. despite the police's warnings to leave the matter to them, because of the extreme weather.

Diary, he never left my side my entire stay at the hospital, except for food or bathroom breaks. (He even set office at my bedside table, it was finals week for him at university.)

I expected him to continue to rant off at my 'stupidity,' My guardians gave me a good scolding, and I thought he would do the same.

But he remained quiet the whole time.

I wasn't used to this kind of treatment, and so I demanded him, (crying again, of course,) why he wasn't mad at me.

He said he couldn't blame me. He said it's inevitable. Sometimes we do idiotic things when we love someone.

I asked him how he knew such things when he himself has never been in love.

He quietly corrected me.

Ue-sama, it turns out, has been in love with this mysterious girl,

ever since he was a little boy.*


The sun had finally set, but the night did not take away the magic of the setting. Lanterns were lit ablaze, string lights brought a festive atmosphere, and the stars were infinite, with no pollution to hinder the view.

She came running to him, smiling in greeting. She exchanged her 12-layer kimono for the standard 6-piece, took off her ceremonial make-up, but she still looked beautiful, nonetheless.

They walked side by side for a while as they checked out the stalls. They tried out a couple of games, and he would laugh when she would joke, or lean down to her when she would softly point out something that caught her interest.

She would remain oblivious to his stolen glances, more often than 'once a while'.

They stopped in a shateki stall, and Kaoru happily called out to the stall keeper. It seemed like she was an old friend.

"Oh hello," the old woman greeted the redhead with a smile. "Who is this friend of yours?"

"Evening, Kaede-san," Kaoru said, "This is Kenshin, a friend from high school."

"Nice to meet you, young lad!" The old woman smiled, and Kenshin smiled back. She turned to the stall, and produced an air rifle, "So... the usual? Which prize do you want this year?"

"That llama looks cute," she said as she received the toy gun. Kaoru immediately positioned the rifle before her, to a smiling little plush. "Don't you think so, Kenshin?"

"It does," Kenshin commented, studying the stuffed animals with piqued interest. They held comical facial expressions that a child would certainly find amusing.

"Eh, Kamiya-san," The old woman suddenly asked, "Where's that young man you come with every year?"

The redhead stiffened.

"He's out of the country," Kaoru answered, still concentrating on her aim. "He's a busy man."

"He's such a good marksman!" The old woman continued, "What happens to the toys he wins you throughout the years, though?"

Kaoru curled her finger around the trigger. "I keep 'em in my room."

The woman laughed. "Ah, how cute! Your room must be filled with—" she stopped.

The redhead had stepped behind Kaoru and braced his arms around her shoulders, engaging her in what looked like a rather intimate embrace.

The old lady blushed, watching the two. "Oh my!"

He then wrapped his hands around hers, guiding her fingers, fine-tuning her aim.

"Tilt it a bit to the right," his breath tickled her ears.

The woman tried to shrug him off.

"I got it," Kaoru huffed stubbornly, but he kept his hold to her firm. "Kenshin, too close!"

"You want the llama or not?" he pressed closer, his cheek now touching the side of her face as he leaned forward.

A determined fire lit her eyes. "Of Course! But this isn't for me. This is for Ue-sam—"

He suddenly jerked sideways, and startled, she fired. The pellet hit the steel framework of the tent, ricocheting to the left. The projectile almost hit the poor shopkeeper, and she ducked down as the projectile came flying in dangerous directions.

It hit the metal stand where the toys sat, and the hazardous bullet came flying towards them.

"Woah!" she shrieked, as Kenshin yanked her behind him, shielding her from the rubber bullet.

It went POP! As it hit his back.

She blinked up at him, and then she gaped. "You made me miss on purpose!" she accused.

"Did not." Kenshin pulled away smugly. "Why would I do that?"

"Yeah. Why would you do that?" she placed her hands on her hips, "Perhaps you were afraid that the amazing Kaoru would steal your thunder, Mister Three-time USA Archery Champion!?"

He reeled, taken aback. Then the redhead hung his head low, as his shoulders mysteriously started shaking. It wouldn't take long for the mystery to be revealed.

He threw his head back and exploded in laughter.

"Hey, what are you laughing at?" Kaoru protested. "It's not even funny!"

It could not be helped. Tears were in the corner of his eyes as he tried to un-tickle his funnybone, but couldn't, "Your friends weren't kidding..." he murmured in between breaths, recalling an entry in her diary, and it was there, the label he mentally stamped on her forehead:

*DENSE.*

"Himura." Kaoru folded her hands before her, unimpressed. "Win me that llama now or else—"

A purposeful coughing cut the banter short, and the two shifted their attention to the source. It was the shopkeeper, with a blush to her cheeks and a smile on her face.

She was pointing to the floor.

Two plushes: the smiling llama and an angry ice cream had been accidentally knocked off the stand.


"Why can't I have the ownership rights?!" Kaoru tailed the yukata-clad redhead. She was secretly trying to snatch the plushes from him, but he was simply too fast for her.

"If it wasn't for my intervention, you wouldn't have won those two."

"It's technically mine." She pulled on his sleeve as he raised the plushes high up, away from her reach.

"It wouldn't be technically yours if I didn't win it in the first place."

"Can't we just split the prize?" she complained. "I'll take llama, and you take grumpy ice cream."

"Grumpy ice cream doesn't appreciate you rejecting her."

Kaoru's jaw dropped. "I am not choosing the llama over her!" she reached out to the toy, "Grumpy, don't listen to that meanie! Mama loves you just as much!"

Kenshin suddenly stopped. He turned around, locking eyes with a confused Kaoru. She squinted at him, but she would realize in that instant: he was dead serious.

"Kensh—"

"I'll give you the llama." He said. Kaoru fell quiet, and she waited...

She knew well enough that there would be conditions attached.

She was not wrong.

"Grumpy stays with me. I'll give you the llama, as long as you keep him and not give him away."

"But—"

He was quite annoyed, at the thought of the many plush toys Kaoru had in her room... from this Ue-sama character,

"You shall name the llama as Kenshin." He didn't even flinch at how ridiculous he sounded, "Kenshin may look happy, but in reality, he is really lonely."

"Oh," she exclaimed, fully absorbed at the backstory,

"He's traveled so many places," he continued, "He even has houses in far-away lands. Although he has lots of pretty houses, the sad thing is, he really doesn't have any house that feels like home."

The blue in her eyes suddenly flickered, as if she had just realized something.

"He would feel really sad if you gave him away." Kenshin ended.

The flicker in her eyes suddenly died, and a certain sadness veiled her pretty face. She took a step away from him, and she cast her gaze to the ground, hiding her eyes with the shade of her hair.

"Kenshin... if—"

She suddenly tipped, almost knocked over by some unseen force.

The unseen force, it turned out to be, were the sisters Ayame and Suzume.

"Mama, mama!" they clamored, as the surprised woman gave them a little kiss on their cheeks.

"Wow," Suzume stared up at the angry ice cream on Kenshin's hand, her eyes twinkling. "Where'd ya get that, Mister Himura?"

"Oh, there's a llama, too!" Ayame came closer.

As he watched the little girls as they stared longingly at the toys. He looked at Kaoru, who shrugged, then shifted his gaze back to the girls.

He smiled, as he sighed in defeat.

Needless to say, he wasn't carrying the toys for the rest of the evening.


*The girl he likes is really pretty, but he will never tell her. He says he doesn't want the compliment to go into her head.

She is intelligent, he says, but he will never praise. It might puff her up, she is already quite prideful to start with.

She is headstrong, he admits, she is the only one who can mentally par with him. But as smart as she is, Ue-sama says she is incredibly dense.

He has been in love with her since they were little...yet she is clueless.

He grew up with her. They know each other very well... and as I listen to him speak about this girl, I ask him who this mystery lady was.

He will not tell.

Why not just confess? I ask him. He stares at me for the longest time, a most strange look, and he tells me that I already know the answer.*


Ayame yawned. Suzume did, too, and so it was a coincidence that Dr. Gensai happened to pass by. They offered to take the girls home, but they would not let go of Kenshin.

He was carrying Suzume, and Ayame had clung on his hand.

Any efforts to separate them from the redhead only resulted in the biggest toddler tantrum. The only way they were able to calm them down was when they had Kenshin promise to ride home with them to the Kamiya mansion, and tell them a bedtime story before they went to sleep.

"How about mama?" Suzume asked.

"I'll come home a little bit later with your aunts and uncles," Kaoru promised, "But now you have to go home. It's way past your bedtime."

Dr. Gensai went to get their car ready, and Kaoru waited with Kenshin and the girls by the gate. Kenshin caught sight of a familiar vehicle approaching, and so he turned to the woman beside him.

"See you tomorrow?"

She smiled at him cheerily. "See you tomorrow."

He smiled back at her, and he turned away. It was only a few paces he had walked when she suddenly shifted.

"Ah, you forgot something," she suddenly said.

With the two girls lugged on his arms, Kenshin turned around. He raised a brow at her in question.

"I said you forgot something," she said.

The evening breeze brought in a shower of peach blossoms, and time seemed to stand still at that beautiful moment.

The kimono-clad woman stood still by the torii gates, blushing:

"You forgot my goodnight kiss."


The young man froze. In an instant, he felt a burning heat creep up into his cheeks, and for a while he thought his mind had stalled.

She looked at him expectantly,

her eyes were a deep, mesmerizing blue, reflecting the specks of gold that were the lanterns around.

He was robbed of speech, yet she only laughed softly.

"Come now, I haven't got all night," she prodded.

The redhead took a hesitant step forward, and he saw her face light up to a happy smile. He took another step, then another...

Until all too suddenly, the weight on his arms suddenly lifted: the two girls hopped off his carry and darted towards Kaoru.

The woman received them with an eager hug.

"G'night, mama!" they said in unison, and they gave Kaoru her kiss. They ran back to a stunned Kenshin.

"Bye!" she waved at him, and he managed to wave back, as Dr. Gensai's car pulled up beside them.

In a daze he opened the door, helping the girls in their car seats. Like a mechanical toy he absently snapped their seatbelts on, and he smiled at them as he patted their heads and secured their new toys at their side.

And before he stepped inside, Kenshin turned around, to the torii gates where Kaoru stood.

*He stared at me for the longest time, all the while holding the strangest look, and he tells me that I already know the answer:

He loves her,

And so he will not rush.

He will wait quietly beside her, support her every cause, until she finally sees him and his efforts.

When you love someone you do stupid things, he says, and this is probably the most stupid thing he will admit to having done:

He has placed his heart completely on her hands.

Diary, I sprang out of bed and I hugged him. I was crying the whole time. No wonder Ue-sama never confronted me for what happened, because he knows how it feels.

I feel that way too, with Himura-senpai.

I told him not to worry, because I'm confident that one day, his girl will realize his loyalty.

He just stayed silent the whole time,

But I knew he was listening...

Because he hugged me back tight.*


He was transported back into that memory, that unforgettable image that he took for granted, so long ago: a hapless, clumsy girl with pig-tailed braids and oversized glasses, waiting for him eagerly under the snow of cherry blossoms. That girl would smile at him nervously upon his arrival. She would stutter and look away, unable to hold his gaze.

That girl was a woman now, standing under the torii gates, holding a confident smile. She bowed down slightly, thanking him for his time that evening.

The peach-blossom petals fell beautifully on her hair,

And with one last wave, she turned around and walked away.

Kenshin waited, a curious, most familiar feeling rising in his throat. His eyes never left her receding figure. He waited until Dr. Gensai was asking him something, until the girls were calling his name.

But she melted into the crowd, disappeared from his sight. The curious emotion dropped slowly from his throat, down to his chest.

A restless feeling had settled in him:

For she never looked back.

The redhead gathered himself and stepped into the car, closing the door behind him.


*Just as I am wishing for Himura-senpai's acceptance, I hope Ue-sama's first love will finally see his devotion and accept him, too.

I know it may not be today, or tomorrow, or maybe not even for a long time...

But I will be waiting for that day, Diary.

I will be praying hard.*