Soooo the missing episode (code orange) is like officially one of my favourite episodes yet! And it inspired me to write another fanfiction! It's basically based off Fenisha's and Will's thoughts before, during, and after that episode. So the first few chapters will be mainly about Fenisha, but then I'll do the ones after that more from Will's perspective (I'll put who it is at the top to avoid confusion though). I'll also changing some things and adding in others so that it works for the story- so some things might be recognisable, whilst others might change. The first chapter will probably have the most in common to the episode.

Also bear in mind this is set circa the end of March, when it was supposed to come out. It might end up as Fenisha and Will pairing, but it might end up with none or her and Ethan... if you want you can leave a comment and say!

Now on with the story!

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or some of the plot, also some things people say are word for word from the show- these will be bold.

Fenisha

She really didn't want to go to work today. She was pregnant with Ethan's child, she and Will had a massive falling out, resulting in what she presumed was the end of their relationship, and to top it all off, the dreaded morning sickness had started. Not so bad that she was throwing up at all, but bad enough to make her have barely any energy to do anything. She also had a bad feeling which she couldn't shake off, and had woken up several times in the night. Plus, she still hadn't decided what she was going to do about the baby. On one hand, she did want kids- but on the other, she now had no boyfriend, was not romantically interested in the father, and didn't think she had enough money to support a baby. It seemed like an impossible situation- too much to think about early on a Saturday morning.

So now she was sitting at her kitchen table, having a staring contest with a piece of toast. She could just imagine her mum telling her she needed to eat something- as if that was going to happen, she thought silently to herself.

The clock on the wall read 6:30; she had to be at work for 7. She lived too far from the hospital to walk, so she caught the bus- there was one at 6:40 which she usually got.

She checked her phone- three missed calls from Will. She groaned- yet another impossible situation. On one hand, she still loved him- but on the other, he has been extremely clear that he wanted her to get rid of it. And it wasn't even that she didn't agree with him- she had no idea what to think- but it was the fact that he was telling her what to do, when it wasn't his body- or his problem anymore. She'd always been good at keeping secrets and things to herself; she had two older brothers who would either tease her for everything, or make her their little princess- the combination of which had ended up making her very much 'live in herself'- not listen to what other people said and do what she thought was right. This had its advantages and disadvantages, and often ended up with more negative than positive results.

If only it had made the test negative, she thought miserably.

Sighing, she pushed her chair back and pulled her coat on, before heading out of the door and to the bus stop.


Fenisha was silent for the whole journey to their first callout. The jolting of the ambulance speeding across the narrow roads only added to the nausea she already felt.

Beside her, Lev was smirking to himself, believing that she was probably hungover from a night of drinking. To be fair, had it been a typical night from the past few weeks, he would have been spot on. Fenisha decided that she would rather be hungover than pregnant at the moment.

"Heavy night?"

She glanced towards him. She hadn't been drinking- not since she found out she was pregnant- but decided that it would be easier to pretend that she had rather than tell him the truth- or make up a separate lie about just being ill.

In the end, she opted for staying silent, letting him decide for himself her response.

Their conversation flitted back and forth as they walked up to where the woman was lying on the floor.

"She's not dead," Lev commented, feeling for a pulse.

"Need the de-fib?"

"She's breathing." Lev carried on examining her- the pulse was bradycardic, she had pinpoint pupils- yet it didn't really add up.

"Will you get the stretcher for me?" He asked Fenisha.

"What did your last slave die of?"

"Not getting me the stretcher." It was a joke, but he was also serious- something wasn't right and they needed to get the lady to hospital.

But Fenisha wasn't concerned about that anymore- why was this lady walking her dog when she had nothing that you would walk your dog with?

"If you're going to be sick, do it quickly!" Lev called as she wandered over to where the dog was. She ignored him- the morning sickness wasn't at the front of her mind, nor were all the other problems she had. If this lady didn't have the dog's things... maybe there was someone else.

There. She caught sight of a male curled up and groaning. There was a second casualty.


Lev was standing outside by the ambulance, looking at his phone, when Fenisha came out of the ED.

"Rock, paper, scissors, loser has to drive."

Lev smirked. Fenisha was much younger than him, but he still enjoyed playing childish games with her- she was his friend and it made him feel younger.

As they were about to start, Will walked up to Fenisha. Her face fell instantly. She thought she had loved Will- god, deep down, she still did love him. But it was all so complicated- she didn't even know if she was sure what love was anymore. Surely love didn't fill you with dread when that person came up to you?

"Can you give me a sec?" She asked Lev, who sensed that this was something private. He nodded, and stepped back- but not out of sight- he wasn't sure if trusted Will, who was looking slightly angry at that moment in time.

"So that's it?" Will asked.

"Yeah. That's it."

"Why are you being like this? I thought we were going somewhere?" Will said.

Fenisha frowned. "I think you're forgetting that you literally told me I should get an abortion, or you'd break up with me. So we broke up."

"I didn't mean it like that!" Will protested. "I just thought that we were good together."

"Yeah, well maybe you thought wrong!" She said, glaring at him.

"Well at least I think, unlike you seem to!"

Fenisha stood there, shocked. She'd never thought of Will as harsh- she knew she certainly could be headstrong and un-empathetic, but she'd always thought Will was gentler.

"So are you keeping it?"

"How many times? I don't know."

"But you're not getting an abortion,"

"Will can you please keep your voice down!" Fenisha whispered.

"You haven't told anyone else?"

"What do you think?"

"Why won't you tell me who the father is?"

"Because it's none of your business?"

"Fenisha-"

"Will, can you just leave me alone? I've got a lot going on and I'm not feeling too great right now," she said, starting to walk off.

"No, Fenisha-" Will said, automatically grabbing her arm. He hadn't done it on purpose- it was more of a reflex than anything else.

"Ow Will!" Fenisha cried, pulling her arm away.

"Is everything okay?" Lev said, coming up and looking between the pair.

"Yeah fine," Fenisha said, as Will walked off. She had to force the words out, though, and had to look away as she climbed into the ambulance.

"What was that about?" Lev asked as Fenisha drove to their next callout.

"Nothing."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Talk about what?" She replied weakly.

"Whatever is making you sad."

"It's nothing."

"I don't believe you."

Fenisha sighed, and bit her lip.

"When I first met you, you were happy, and confident," Lev said. "And you didn't seem like someone who would suffer from hangovers." That made her laugh slightly. "You just don't seem like the sort of person who gets sad about tiny things."

Fenisha shrugged, not knowing what to say.

"You're my friend, we're a team. I want to help you, Fenisha."

"How much of that conversation did you hear?" She asked, despite being pretty sure of the answer.

Lev paused, before answering; "Quite a lot."

"So do you really need to be asking that question?"

The was a moment of silence, before Fenisha got out of where they'd parked the ambulance. As they walked towards the house, Fenisha suddenly spoke. "Don't tell anyone. Only Will knows, no one else does."

Lev nodded. "For now. But you need to tell Jan."

"I will. Just give me some time."


The hospital was on lockdown. It was now late in the afternoon and everyone had to decontaminate themselves of they'd been in contact with the affected patients. No one was allowed to leave. Fenisha was standing outside, not really knowing what to do, and thinking about what had just happened. Will had announced to everyone in earshot that she was pregnant. Somehow, the only person around to hear had been Ethan- but she would have preferred it if he'd told everyone other than Ethan. Especially as he was now walking up to her, probably knowing that it was his baby.

She didn't want to have to leave- not that she'd be allowed to anyway- but she couldn't help thinking about the baby that was inside of her. It was a scary concept, that a tiny human was inside her, not noticeable to the outside world yet, but still there- and at the precise moment in time making her feel very ill. But the more she thought about it, the harder it was to think about getting rid of it.

"Fenisha."

"Ethan I'm not in the mood."

"Will said that the baby isn't his." He started. "Could it be... could it be mine?"

She still said nothing, instead looking down at the floor.

"Fenisha, we used protection."

"Protection that works 98% of the time. Welcome to the 2% club." She said dryly.

"Are you absolutely sure you're-"

"Yes. If you really want to know I took 3 tests. And I only found out yesterday morning, okay?"

"Does anyone else know, or-"

"Fenisha?" Ethan was cut off by Lev calling for the paramedic.

"I've got to go Ethan."

As she walked away, neither of them noticed the doctor watching from the distance.


"What is it with you and these ED doctors?" Lev said, jokingly. They were now around the back of the hospital, as Lev had gathered Fenisha would want some privacy to talk to him- if she would tell him anything, that was.

"Not in the mood, Lev." She said bluntly.

"Sorry. Are you okay?"

She shrugged. "I've been better."

"You should tell Jan. I'm serious." Lev said, when she rolled her eyes at his first statement. He dropped his voice. "Fenisha, you could be putting yourself and the baby at risk. Do you really want to do that?"

She shrugged weakly, tears starting to slide out of her eyes. "I don't know what I want, Lev."

He sighed, and wrapped his arms around his friend.

"Does no one else know?"

"Ethan knows now."

"And is that good?"

"Not when he's the baby's father." She whispered, breaking away from his hug to see how he would react.

"You Brits really know how to complicate things, don't you."

"Tell me about it."

"You don't know what to do, do you." Lev said.

"What would you do?" She asked, glancing up at him.

Lev shrugged. "I'm not a woman, I've never been in your position. How can I say when I don't even understand? I can't tell you what to do. It's your decision."

"Thanks for being so helpful." Fenisha replied sarcastically.

"Well what did you want to hear?"

She sighed. "I don't know."

She leant back against the wall of the hospital, wishing she could close her eyes and make herself disappear.

"Are you ok?" Lev asked again.

Fenisha swallowed. She'd already told Lev this much, she may as well tell him everything. "The morning sickness started earlier today. Except it's not being very true to its name, as I don't think it's the morning at the moment."

"That can't be enjoyable." Lev commented. "I remember when Faith was pregnant with our first, she was sick every morning from 8 weeks until 18. How long gone are you?" He asked.

She bit her lip. "Five or six weeks."

"That's early then."

Fenisha nodded. "I know."

"It's not just that though. There's something else you're not telling me." said Lev.

"I just don't know if I even want kids right now. I don't even know if I'd be a good mum. I'm so sick of not knowing anything."

Lev sighed, and embraced the younger paramedic again, before adding, "If you're going to be sick, give me a warning."

Fenisha smirked. "Will do."


And that's the first chapter! Hope you enjoyed it- I know quite a bit of it was from the episode and just written in a different way, but the second chapter will be different!

If you liked it (or didn't like it :O) please feel free to leave a review! Thank you!