1993

Dear diary,

I'm so excited! I had an interview for a new job earlier today and they were so impressed they hired me on the spot! Seems the dear old Mr. Crane was shot in the hip during some sort of police work and his son has graciously come all the way from Boston to take care of him. I must confess I'm quite bowled over by the prospect of calling the apartment home, it's really quite grand with the most amazing view of the Space Needle!

Don't suppose I'll be staying too long though, Mr. Crane is quite chipper and he'll probably be back to health in no time.

Cheerio


Dear diary,

Just met Dr. Crane's brother, he's also a doctor (and also a psychiatrist). I suppose that will get quite confusing with them both being a 'Dr. Crane', but between us I suppose I can call them Frasier and Miles. No need to stand on duty for you now is there?

Miles seemed very different from his brother, much smaller and softer in manner. He made a great fuss over me and my accent. Who would have thought? But the attention was nice. He even offered to let me share a pack of Devonshire clotted creams he brought over for his dad which I'm tucking into now. Turns out Mr. Crane doesn't like them so I've got them all to myself ha ha!


Dear diary,

Mr. Crane was especially grumpy about doing his exercises today, truth be told I think he feels a bit embarrassed about needing a cane. Whenever a woman catches his eye in the elevator he shuffles his cane behind his leg. I suppose being a policeman taking care of the public and now needing to be cared for must be hard on him.

Poor old dear. Still I'm optimistic he won't be needing it for much longer.

Turns out Frasier's brother's name is actually Niles, I was so embarassed! Why didn't he just tell me? He did the sweetest thing and brought me a pack of my favourite lemon biscuits totally out of the blue. They remind me of Grammy Moon and home. I have a feeling we're going to become great friends.

Ta-ta for now


Dear diary,

I got most of the day off and went for a very thorough walk around the town to parts unknown. Seattle really is every bit the city I dreamed it would be. As much as people complain about the rain it doesn't bother me... People tell me I just don't notice it because I'm from England.

A few hours ago the Cranes had a little family get together and I finally got to meet Niles's wife Maris. I thought Mr. Crane and Frasier were pulling my leg when they spoke about her but she was even skinnier and meaner than they said she was. She spent the entire evening looking down her nose at me and complaining about my cooking. In the end she got out a bottle of multivitamins, cut one in half, and swallowed that instead. Apparently she's convinced the ice cubes add calories so she made Niles get her a fresh one, but part of me wonders if she just didn't want to drink from a glass I'd touched. Ooh I've never felt so insulted! Her list of allergies seemed like an excuse to get out of eating anything I'd spent hours making for her.

I didn't dare say anything of course but from what I've heard Mr. Crane and Frasier feel the same way and I caught them exchanging glances, especially whenever she made snide remarks about Niles. What does he see in her anyway?

I was glad to be able to excuse myself and decided to re-read Wuthering Heights in my room instead.


1994

Dear diary,

I've already fallen in love! His name's Eric, he's so good looking and charming. Eric, Eric, Eric, even his name sounds handsome. He has the most exquisite long red hair, looks just like a viking! I've taken to calling him Eric the Red. Oh and he even has a band!

Looks like I was right to leave Clive behind after all, he'll still be on the dole tinkering with his cars no doubt. Now I'm dating a future rockstar!

I wonder if he'll take me on tour with him?

Cheerio!


Dear diary,

Men are such pigs! I hate bands! And I hate Vikings!


Dear diary,

Had the strangest evening, nearly made a complete fool of myself.

I'd promised to help Niles fix up a meal for his wife's return. Apparently they had some sort of misunderstanding and she'd taken off for the weekend in a huff. I don't know what they were fighting about but Mr. Crane kept putting on a pirate accent so I'm guessing she stole something.

They have the most beautiful house. Actually that's an understatement, it's a mansion, a real live gothic mansion just like a Bronte novel! There were even gargoyles!

I accidentally let slip about you-know-who but now I'm glad I did. Niles spent the entire evening comforting me, making sure I never felt like a burden. No wonder he does so well in his practice. He's so considerate. He said the sweetest things to me, something about how I'm warm and loving and special. I don't know what came over me but I suddenly just felt so strangely close to him and couldn't help blurting out something embarrassing to that effect.

I'm glad I didn't say or do anything even sillier than that because not moments later he started talking excitedly about his wife. And then oh you won't believe it! Frasier started banging on the windows! He actually had the cheek to come all the way over in this weather just to accuse his brother of infidelity! I tell you that man has more front than Brighton!

I told him off of course but I feel a bit guilty about the whole thing. I'll have to be more careful with my tongue in the future, but I'm quite sure Niles is a good friend now. I wonder if he feels the same way?


Dear diary,

When I was hired as a physical therapist I thought Mr. Crane would be my only patient, but it seems Frasier is even more troublesome than his dad when he falls ill!

In case you haven't guessed Frasier was bedridden. Flu, I think. I've been nursing him which I don't mind but he's just as fussy when delirious as he is in daily life. Bloody hell, you wouldn't believe the amount of times I had to walk back and forth from the kitchen just to fetch a specific glass and specific type of straw and specific type of handkerchief, and whatever else His Majesty so desired.

The patient managed to escape our clutches and ran off down to his radio station. Niles was filling in for him and doing a very good job I might add, quite a natural. It was nice to hear him sound so confident and energetic for a change. He never sounds that way when Maris is around.

Frasier ended up creating a huge commotion live on air which I of course listened to in total shock. He thinks it was a bad dream. I'm just waiting until he's nice and lucid before letting him know it most certainly was not! Ha ha!

Cheerio

TBC