"One-sixty… one-eighty… two hundred," the plump woman said, sliding a packet of bills off her jewel-laden fingers and into yours, like water pouring out of a spout.

"Thank you," you replied, hesitant to pocket the load with those two, round, black eyes still staring at you, burrowing into your soul. They belonged to a young girl, nine or ten in age, perhaps, with short, auburn hair, her little white and turquoise dress bouncing up and down as she rocked back and forth on the balls of her feet, waiting, watching.

"She'll need watch every weekday from three to nine," instructed the woman, barely even looking at you or her daughter as she checked her purse for something. "If you have any trouble you have my work number."

"Yes, Ma'am."

"But you'll be no trouble. Will you, Elmyra?"

"Oh, no, Ma'am. Nopey nopey nope! We're gonna have so much fun laughing and cuddling and playing with all my fuzzy whittle animals!" screeched the girl, in a voice that scratched like sandpaper.

"Yes, dear. Be good to your new babysitter, all right? Mommy has to go to work now."

"Bye byeeeeeee!" Elmyra waved, smiling widely in mock innocence as her mother stepped out the door.

"Bye," you called out, a bit half-heartedly.

As soon as the door snapped closed, Elmyra turned to look at you expectantly, beaming.

"All right. She's gone. You can go play with your pets," you said.

"Yaaaaaaaay! I'm coming, my fuzzy whuzzies!"

And off she hopped, skipping down the hall and around a corner ever so gayly, to a spot that you knew to be her bedroom, where all manner of horrible and unspeakable things happened.

You turned, leaned against the front door, and inhaled a long, deep breath of air, practically sliding against the thing as you counted out the greens in your hand - one one-hundred, a fifty, a ten, and two twenties. Yep. Checked out.

You pocketed the loose change, paused, then got up and stuck it in your backpack instead. It's not like it was going anywhere for a while. Besides, you hated carrying around more than you needed to in your small pants pockets.

Tossing the backpack next to the living room couch, you collapsed onto said couch and took a gander at your new surroundings.

It was a quaint little abode. Could have done with a new paint job, perhaps, but the yellow interior and old-style furniture wasn't completely abhorrent. The whole cottage was rather cute, in its own weird way, sporting the occasional gothic chandelier that would have looked much more at home in Edward Scissorhands' house, or a wastebasket that was far too frilly and posh to even be used for its original purpose. But the seating was comfortable, the cable was working, and, best of all, the fridge, stuffed to its seams, was, according to Mrs. Duff, 100% at your disposal. If there was anything that solidified a job offer for you, it was free food.

Not that the job was all chipper and charm. You knew what you were getting into when you took it, and the intermittent screams coming from Elmyra's bedroom, as well as the cat that nearly bit your finger off from earlier as you tried to coax him out from under the kitchen table, were stark reminders of that. Everyone in the city of Burbank knew who the Duff family was, whether it was personally or from the horror stories passed down the school halls. Most who visited their house, unless they were a close family friend or relative, never wanted to step back in it again. It was common knowledge that you only went to Elmyra's if you wanted a nice, long day of yelling and suffering, and all in your dorm would have rather died than take on the job of babysitter when it was posted online. But you took it. You took it… partially 'cause you had no choice. What with a full-time college schedule and not much else in the cupboard save for ramen and three-day-old apples, cash was in short supply and desperately needed, and even though the last thing you'd rather do was keep watch over this kid, you also couldn't find a job anywhere else. Besides, the pay was good. Excellent, in fact. Two hundred every Friday. You might even splurge on Chinese this weekend.

Sliding the remote off the thick, wooden table, you flipped through the channels, one-by-one, finally landing on National Geographic. The narrator was deep in discussion about the living habits of bats. Appropriate, you thought, as Elmyra flitted out of the room, make-shift cape trailing behind her and blindfold on, zoomed into the kitchen and grabbed a packet of cookies before zipping back into her room, sounding very much like a bat as she laughed in a loud, screeching tone the entire time. You did a double-take as she slammed the door behind her. Were there… other voices coming from the room? No. That's silly. You shook your head. Crazy.

The next couple of hours went by surprisingly uneventfully; so much so, in fact, that you wondered if there was any basis in the rumors that floated around about the Duff residence being a literal "house of horror". Some even said the place was haunted. It wasn't until 6:55 PM, when you went to remind Elmyra that dinner was almost ready, that you got a whiff that things weren't… quite what they seemed.

Of the menagerie loose throughout the house, Elmyra owned a total of one cat, a parrot, a turtle, and two white mice. The turtle hid. The parrot squawked. And the mice? The mice… talked.

"Narf! Hello there!" the taller of the two said, as you meandered into the room. You cocked an eyebrow and hesitantly lifted a hand to wave at him.

"Hi…," you replied, a little taken aback.

The shorter mouse didn't look up at you. His focus was heavily trained on a notepad rife with complex calculations far beyond your intellect. He was scribbling away as if his life depended on it. He also called you a "disposable hindrance", albeit indirectly to his associate, something you didn't entirely appreciate, but you also didn't dare talk back. Not yet.

"Oooo. Munchie time! Come on, little mousies!" Elmyra cheered, and she grabbed both rodents tight around the neck with her short, groping fingers, stuffing them into her shirt pocket as she ran out of the room and in the direction of the kitchen.

You stood behind for a moment, nonplussed. Okay then.

A soft shuffling down the hallway made you turn. It was the cat. He still looked quite wary of you.

"Hey, kitty," you cooed, gently but not in a childish fashion; more like you were simply greeting a friend. "You gonna let me pet you this time?" you asked, bending down and holding out a hand for him to sniff.

Tenderly, cautiously, the cat stepped up to you, wagging its tail slightly behind him. You narrowed your eyes. A wagging tail wasn't necessarily a good thing, especially when it came to cats, but this was… different. The closer he got to you the more he wagged it, as if he was… excited? Curious? He sniffed your hand… and licked it. Odd. Then he peered up into your face, lolled out a long, pink tongue, and barked.

You sat back a little, wide-eyed, as the cat-dog jumped up onto your legs and actually started licking your face. It was… weird. Cute, but… weird.

After a few hearty licks, the cat, satisfied, jumped back down, scratched itself, and ran off to play with a ball. You wondered why he hadn't come up to you before. Perhaps he still had more of the cat than the dog in him. You also now understood why some people claimed that this house was "haunted". Two talking mice and a barking cat. Not exactly "spooky", under your terms, but definitely unusual. You wondered what other treasures this quirky household held. Pirate bones? Dinosaurs? You had to admit it was rather exciting.

Shuffling back into the kitchen, you found Elmyra at the table, greedily shoveling the macaroni and cheese you'd made for her into her mouth as she watched a cartoon program on tv. The mice sat beside her in a little highchair, both now dressed as infants, the big-headed one looking absolutely miserable. Now and again, Elmyra would shovel a huge spoonful of mac and cheese into one or the other's mouth against their will. Lanky mouse didn't seem to mind it too much. Grumpy mouse turned to look at you with an expression that read: "shoot me".

"Elmyra, be careful with how you feed your pets, okay? They might not like too much mac and cheese…," you suggested, cautiously, frowning a little at the big-headed mouse in pity.

You knew, of course, about this kid's harsh treatment of her pets. Everyone knew. But her parents were rich, and could probably buy out the police station and the A.S.P.C.A. if they'd wanted to, and so no one said anything. Still, as an animal-lover, you were curious. Just how badly did she handle her critters? Maybe you could do something to relieve their pain while you were there? And the situation was bad, certainly, but you'd seen worse, and there was only so much you could say besides, at least while she was awake. Too much rebellion and you'd probably be fired. That being said, you fully intended to assist in giving the poor things a little reprieve once Elmyra went to bed in an hour, and so you let the macaroni-shoveling slide… for now.

8:00 PM came and went, with little deviation from the norm aside from Elmyra quickly popping into the kitchen again at 7:23 PM, opening the freezer, and succinctly closing it before racing back into her bedroom. You shrugged at the gesture, barely turning around from the tv, figuring she probably just went to grab some ice cream. Thankfully, Elmyra not only went to bed early, but also was a heavy sleeper, so by the time 8:15 rolled around she was already obediently in bed and snoring, needing only a reminder from you ten minutes prior. The lanky mouse opened an eye as you peeked in. He was sleeping in the bed with her.

"Sorry," you muttered, making to close the door, but the little mouse sat up.

"Wait! D-Do you mind checking on Brain? Elmyra said he went to Antarctica, but… he hasn't been back in a while. You'll go look for him, won't you?" he asked, twisting his tail as he said it.

"Sure. I'll look for him," you responded pleasantly, and you meant it. The mouse smiled.

"Oh, thank you!" he whispered, tucking back into bed. "Good night!"

"Night," you whispered back, closing the door softly behind you.

You frowned. Antarctica? More than likely, cranky mouse was simply hiding somewhere, but internally you promised to keep an eye out and check a few cupboards.

Several drawers, a pantry, numerous cupboards, and a couple of closets later and you still couldn't find the little mouse. You even checked the higher areas of the house, wondering if "Antarctica" meant somewhere scalable and colder. Your first thought, of course, had been the freezer, but that was preposterous. She wouldn't be that cruel. Would she…?

Out of pure curiosity, you headed back into the kitchen, grabbing a bowl from a cupboard as you did so. You were hungry anyway and figured that a hearty helping of ice cream before you left in half an hour certainly couldn't hurt. You had free reign of the fridge, after all.

You set down your little blue bowl on the counter. You grabbed a spoon from a drawer and set it in the bowl. You even snatched a couple of Oreo cookies from an Oreo cookie box nearby and plopped them next to the bowl for good measure. Could never be too careful.

Noticing that Elmyra had left a box of frozen fruit pops on the counter without putting them back, you shook your head, grabbed it, opened the freezer door… and dropped the box onto the floor with a loud plop. Hastily, you whipped off your red sweater, reached into the freezer, and pulled out a little white ball of frozen fur and whiskers.

"Oh, you poor baby," you cooed, cradling the small mouse in your sweater as if he were precious cargo. You tittered. "Goodness. You poor thing. She actually put you in here?"

Closing the freezer door, you brought the mouse up close, pressing a finger to where his heart would be. His eyes were shut tight, and he was curled so firmly about himself that it took a little doing to get your finger up to his chest. He didn't stir as you moved him about. There was a heartbeat… barely, faint as a whisper. It was a miracle he was still alive.

Almost instinctively, you cupped him in your hands, brought him over to the sink, and slowly turned on the faucet, checking that the water was lukewarm before carefully sticking him under the steady stream. You didn't want it too hot right off the bat. Even a warm temperature might be a shock.

Two minutes later, after you'd let the (hopefully) stimulating mini waterfall wash over him, you turned off the faucet and proceeded to dry him off with a towel - softly; slowly. He still hadn't stirred, not even a little, and you gulped. Were you too late..?

8:35 PM. The stillness of the night, save for the now dimmed volume of the television, found you sitting once more on the couch, this time with a fuzzy occupant in hand. Big-headed mousie - the… Brain… he was called? - lay cradled in your arms, encompassed about with a very soft, very woolly blanket indeed. It was the fluffiest you could find in the house. Nothing less would suffice, in your mind. You could only imagine how frightening of an ordeal it must have been, shivering, cowering in a freezer for an hour, not knowing if the next breath you took would be your last….

A thumb gently stroked the snow white fur of the sleeping mouse, and you couldn't help but massage that oversized head of his from time to time, muttering to him in soothing tones as you did so.

"You poor thing…. I'm so sorry I didn't see you in there earlier," you apologized, even though he probably wasn't listening. He still hadn't opened his eyes, the only indication that he wasn't dead being the steady beat, beat, beat of his thumping heart every half a second.

"You gonna blink for me, sweet heart?"

And then, as if on cue, the little mouse sloooowly blinked, opened his eyes, and stared at you.

"Hey there, little one," you whispered, smiling at him. "Atta boy…."

His eyes began to shift around, rapidly, and he frowned, as if trying to take in all at once where he was and what had happened.

"It's all right. It's all right," you reassured him, readjusting your grip a touch as you continued to hold him close to your chest. "I've got you. Elmyra's asleep. She can't do you any harm. And if she tried I wouldn't let her."

He opened his mouth, closed it, opened it once more, and subsequently shut it again, as if at a loss for words. Perhaps he really was speechless, or perhaps he was still a little stiff from having been locked up in the freezer for so long. Whatever the reason, he continued to stare at you, almost unblinkingly. As you went to pet him again, he reeled back, breathing faster than normal.

"Shhh. Shhh. It's okay," you said calmingly, pausing a mite before resuming your soft massage of his head. "It's all right, little one. I'm not gonna hurt you."

And slowly, hesitantly, he settled.

"'Antarctica'," you mused, shaking your head. "I'm surprised you survived that. Poor thing…."

You continued to talk to him; comfort him. After a solid five minutes of being stroked and cooed to, he actually leaned into your hand. You could tell he enjoyed the massage, reluctant as he was to admit it. A heavy sigh escaped your lips. You couldn't help but feel sorry for the little fellow, even if he had been a bit of a butt to you earlier. How often did this kind of thing happen to him? Weekly? Daily? How often did he bath in this torment? You decided to ask him.

"Does she do this kind of thing to you often?"

He nodded, gaze still trained on you.

"Like… daily?"

He nodded again. You sighed.

"I'm so sorry…."

He actually shrugged.

"It's… my life," he coughed out, in a deep, chocolatey voice that was a little raspy. It was almost comical that a voice that low could come from something so diminutive.

"Well, it shouldn't be your life," you countered. "You don't deserve any of this." He simply blinked at you.

"How long has she had you for?"

He shrugged again.

"Over a year..?" he guessed.

"Over a year…. Sheesh…. How are you still alive?" you asked, actually chuckling a little… and regretting it immediately after. This was no laughing matter.

"I… I don't know," the Brain admitted, his body vibrating for a second as it released a shiver. For once, he looked away from you. "I don't know…."

There was something in the way that he said "I don't know", something in the way his voice quivered a touch as it floated off into the air, that made your heart break in two. It was as if he himself couldn't believe they'd held out as long as they had; that they hadn't given up all hope by this time. It was a dry admittance, a sad admittance, and he blinked rather rapidly and sniffed after saying it, as if trying to bite back tears.

Any animosity you'd had for such a creature had completely dissipated by this point. His honesty. His helpless quaver…. They'd destroyed it. With all the more tenderness, you rocked him gently to and fro, taking extra care to massage his whole little body, as best he'd let you anyway, trying to iron out every last bit of pain trapped in those delicate bones. He barely even resisted, save for asking once why you even bothered to help him in the first place.

"Because I think you needed it," was your blunt response.

He'd looked away a little shyly at this, before turning back to look into your eyes.

"Thank you," he muttered, and it sounded sincere.

You simply nodded, smiling at him, continuing to rub out the pain as best you could.

8:47 PM. You tossed a frown at the clock. Mrs. Duff would be back in about thirteen minutes. The time you had spent with your new charge hadn't felt like enough. You were fully aware that you couldn't take him back to your place for extended relief. He'd have to return to Elmyra's room, or, at the very least, be put back somewhere in the house before the mother arrived. This posed a bit of a problem, however, for by this point he'd fallen back to sleep in your arms. You stopped rocking him back and forth for a moment to simply… look at him.

He was so small. Much smaller than expected for a pet mouse. Perhaps he'd been a field mouse in the past? A body that fragile shouldn't be thrown around in a house by a volatile little girl. He should be cared for; comforted; loved.

8:48 PM. He was actually snoring, so quietly it was barely audible. Despite yourself, you leaned down… and kissed him on the top of his head. He stirred, but didn't awaken.

"I'm so sorry," you whispered again, swallowing thickly.

You looked at the clock. 8:49 PM. You sighed.

You couldn't do this. You knew you couldn't do it from the moment you opened the freezer door and saw him lying in there. Two hundred dollars a week wasn't worth it. You were going to be fired and that was that. Screw the money. The thought of leaving the two mice in such a condition as this was unbearable. You couldn't rescue all of her animals, of course, and you hated the idea of stealing, but this one had almost died.

8:50 PM. You groaned. This wasn't going to be easy….

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

Sunday morning saw you bright and early, topping off some pancakes in your dorm room with maple syrup, cutting up a few tiny pieces, and setting aside said pieces on a small napkin on a table. Two little white mice immediately stepped up. You smiled at them as you dug into your own, much larger portion of the breakfast, watching the sun rise beyond the balcony.

In the end, you'd chosen the lesser of two evils: voluntary departure. The moment Mrs. Duff had returned home, you'd politely thanked her for the payment, but regretted that you didn't think you could continue to operate as babysitter. She'd been disappointed, but not surprised. It wasn't the first time a new hire had quit so suddenly. The turn-over rate with Elmyra was high.

And so you left, leaving the two mice behind at the house, but had returned the next day around 1:00 PM while Elmyra was in school and her parents were preoccupied. She had a tendency to leave her bedroom window open, you see, and it didn't take much convincing to persuade the mice to consider new living arrangements. The taller one, whose name turned out to be Pinky, was a bit uncertain, and felt bad about ditching without even a note of thanks or apology, but the Brain said it wouldn't matter, that Elmyra would get over it soon enough and find some other tiny rodents to torture, and so Pinky relented. Not that you could blame him for being hesitant. You also felt bad about literally kidnapping them in this way, but you couldn't think of any alternative.

Watching Pinky happily lick maple syrup from his lips, however, and observing Brain take notes on a pad while he chewed on pancake satisfactorily, you felt it had been worth it. Pinky still felt a bit guilty about ditching Elmyra so suddenly, but he seemed to adjust to change surprisingly quickly, and sweet breakfast food every morning was a-okay in his book. Brain was still getting used to you, and spoke only when necessary, but he hadn't forgotten the freezer incident. When he did speak to you it was fairly formal and polite, and he'd even let you scratch behind his ears now and again. Pinky was undoubtedly the friendlier of the two, and you enjoyed spending time with him, talking about movies and playing board games, but there was a special place in your heart reserved for Mr. Grumpy. You figured that would always be there after what had transpired several nights prior. All you could see whenever you opened a freezer door now was an ivory, frost-bitten body trembling in your hands.

Bright sunlight was pouring into the dorm room now, alighting the chairs, the tables, the dishware…. Smiling, you stood up, plate in hand, and stepped out onto the porch, choosing instead to rest in one of the outside seats, the better to enjoy the day's warmth.

Several minutes later, as you popped a piece of pancake in your mouth, something, or someone, crawled up into the chair beside you. You looked down. It was Brain.

"Hello," you greeted him pleasantly.

"Hello," he replied. He licked his lips a little timidly. "Umm…."

"Yes?"

"I…. Well, I… I just wanted to say that… you've…. Well, it's… it's nicer here than at Elmyra's…."

"Glad to hear that. I would hope so," you smirked.

"And… I…. Well, I… um…," he stammered, scratching at his neck.

You smiled.

"It's okay," you said. "You're welcome."

He looked up at you, then back at the sunrise. A minute passed. Quietly, inconspicuously, he sidled up close to you, and leaned his entire body against yours, closing his eyes as he did so. Your heart warmed at this show of trust. Oh….

Gently, so as not to startle him, you brought up a hand and began massaging him.

"I love you, little one," you whispered under your breath.

In response, he pressed closer against you. It wasn't at all what you expected from him, but you gratefully accepted it all the same.

You both sat like that for a long time, enjoying the touch of the sun's rays, Pinky finally joining in some moments later as he snuggled up to his friend. Brain actually wrapped an arm around Pinky... and smiled. Pinky hugged him back.

A grin tugged at the corners of your mouth as you watched them, before turning your attention back to the sunrise. Hot pancakes. A beautiful view. Soft mice. And no Elmyra. It was nice.

As you petted the two little fuzzies cuddled up next to you, warm and full and far away from any girls who would put them in freezers, one thing became absolutely decided in your mind: no amount of money could ever substitute for this.

The End


Author's Note:

I promised myself I'd never do a self-insert. Granted, that applied more to drawings, and even then I've made a couple of exceptions in the past, but writing out this kind of thing is still a bit embarrassing to me. I feel like it tampers too much with the canon universe, but, then again, so do AUs and even fan fiction in general. Every story is a "what if".

This one came about, however, because I was inspired by a friend of mine, Shuun. She'd written a very sweet little story called Haven Forbid (which I suggest you check out), that was, in turn, partially inspired by a soft idea I'd had in which a young woman, taking on the job of Elmyra's babysitter, discovers Brain trapped in the freezer and proceeds to nurse him back to health. The idea in general is one I've had for months and months and months. Whenever I daydream about cuddling and comforting Brain, it often comes back to this particular scenario. So, yes, it's a flat-out self-insert. Ha-ha. I just normally don't like sharing these things publicly, but Shuun inspired me to be brave. Heh. :)

Although this is written with a y/n perspective, the character of the babysitter is basically me. This is what I would most likely do if in this situation. Pinky, Elmyra, and the Brain is a show that I not only abhor, but that hurts my heart terribly. The pain I feel regarding Brain, watching him get beat up, tossed around, thrown against walls, choked, and all manner of other despicable things, is nigh through the roof. So dearly do I yearn to rescue him from such a predicament that I've literally been in tears thinking about what he had to endure in that show, even though it's technically not canon. He can be a little butt himself sometimes, but he absolutely did not deserve any of what he was put through in that series.

Hand me a little frozen Brain and I'd do exactly what you saw in the story. Let me warm him; hold him; love him; tell him he's not alone…. He'd probably balk at a majority of it, but, deep down, he wants to be comfortable and secure as much as the next person. I have so much love for this little fellow. A lot of the time he needs a kick in the pants, to be certain, and occasionally he'd rather be left alone than spoken to, but once in a while, even though he'd never admit it, I think he also needs a kiss to the head.

(As a side note, the title of this story was… paaaaartially inspired by the famous "Out of the Frying Pan, Into the Fire" chapter title in The Hobbit.)