Author's Note: Welcome back to the rewrite, still trucking along at a snail's pace like the original before it. It's been like, what, three or four months now? Yeah, don't expect this to be a regularly-updated thing. Anyways, here's your friendly reminder that Mom and Dad are named Melissa and Tom in this setting, even if it isn't brought up much. Just thought I'd mention that.


"CALVIN!"

It was morning, and Calvin's mom was calling for him from downstairs. However, the spiky-haired kid's brain was still in sleep mode, and refused to let his body get up. Instead, he pulled the blanket over his head and tried to sleep some more.

"CALVIN, GET UP!" His mother continued to shout from the floor below. He tried to bury himself deeper into the bed.

"THIS IS THE LAST TIME, CALVIN!"

"Just get up, Calvin." Hobbes grumbled from beside him. "I want to sleep."

With a loud, noisy, melodramatic groan, Calvin flung the blankets off of the bed.

"FINE." he said. "But remember, you're coming with me."

Hobbes stopped stretching and yawning, shifting to his best This is gonna suck face. "I was hoping you'd forget that."

"What?" asked Calvin, who had begun putting his clothes on.

"Nothing." muttered Hobbes.

"IF YOU AREN'T DOWN HERE IN A MINUTE, I'M COMING UP THERE MYSELF!" Mom shouted.

Wisely, Calvin and Hobbes began to pick up the pace.


Mom watched as Calvin trudged down the stairs, still half-asleep. His backpack was slung over one shoulder, and his little tiger doll that he brought everywhere was carried over the other. His face just screamed "I am dead inside."

"You're certainly energetic this morning." she noted.

"If only he got up at this hour more often." Calvin's dad muttered.

"Dear!" Mom said.

"I don't see any problem with it." Dad said. "I always start my morning at 6 o'clock AM. I wake up, take a nice, brisk jog around town, then come back and have a nice breakfast of oatmeal. After that, I'm wide awake and ready for the day. The more you can get done in a day, the better!"

Calvin just silently ate his cereal, too tired to say anything. His broken, dead-inside expression did not change as he ate.

"Hey, Calvin," Dad said, turning his attention to his son. "Just think of how much character you'll build at summer camp! Hiking, canoeing, camping..."

"You're not helping, Tom!" Mom said.

Calvin finished his cereal, slung his backpack over his shoulder, and began walking to the door. Mom followed him, making sure he didn't bolt as soon as he was outside.

Dad smiled as he watched his son leave. "What a lucky boy Calvin is! I never got to do any of the things he gets to do when I was his age!"


Calvin and his mother stood at the bus stop, waiting for the bus to come and take Calvin to summer camp. Calvin had gone from being tired to scowling in the direction of where the bus would be.

"Calvin?" asked his mother.

"What?" Calvin mumbled irritably.

"You're taking Hobbes with you to camp?" she went on, noticing the tiger doll he had in his arm.

"Of course I am!" Calvin said indignantly. "I'm not going there on my own! I need protection, companionship, and a meatshield!"

"But don't you think the other kids might pick on you for bringing him?"

"Hobbes is a tiger, Mom! A voracious apex predator! The undisputed king of the wild! If someone makes fun of him, he'll eat them alive!"

Mom sighed. Calvin always acted like Hobbes was a real tiger and not a stuffed toy. It was to be expected from someone his age, and she didn't want to take the joys of childhood away from her son. He'd grow out of it in due time. At least, she hoped that would be the case...

Her thoughts were interrupted by a dark green bus pulling up at the sidewalk. It opened its doors, and Calvin begrudgingly began walking up the stairs. His mother waved goodbye as he left, but he didn't look back even once. Not out of uncaring or spite, mind you, he was simply too grumpy to notice.

Mom watched as the doors closed and the bus drove off. "I hope the camp can survive him." she muttered worriedly.


Calvin sat in the bus with arms crossed, his face in a pout. It had been about an hour now. Or had it been two? Maybe it had gone on for a full day, perhaps even a week. There wasn't a clock in there, so he couldn't tell. Calvin's watch had conveniently stopped working as well, because of course it had. All Calvin had to go off of were his estimates.

"Hey, Calvin?" asked Hobbes.

"What?" Calvin grumbled irritably.

"What's the camp named again?"

"How should I know?!" Calvin demanded. "I haven't read the pamphlet!"

"What do you mean, you didn't read the pamphlet?!" Hobbes asked.

"Why should I?!" Calvin snapped irritably. "I didn't ask to go to Camp Whatsitnow, nor did I want to! I have no reason to care about that wasteland!"

Hobbes sighed. "Do we at least have the pamphlet on-hand somewhere?" he asked, hoping to nip Calvin's rant in the bud.

Calvin paused for a minute, abandoning his tirade. "I don't seem to remember packing it."

Hobbes checked Calvin's backpack. "I seem to remember putting it in the front compartment... Ah! There it is!" He pulled out the folded piece of paper, unfolded it, and shifted himself so that Calvin could see the pamphlet too.

Written on the front of the booklet was CAMP SCIENTIST in big, bold letters. Below was the tagline, "WE'LL MAKE YOUR KIDS INTO SCIENTISTS!" The two read through the booklet, checking the activities. "Hmm..." said Hobbes. "Let's see hereā€¦ Camping, hiking, canoeing..."

"In other words, Camp Scientist has nothing to do with scientists." said Calvin.

"Yep." replied Hobbes.

"What we have here is a clear-cut case of false advertising. Once we get back, I propose we file a lawsuit, immediately!" Calvin declared.

"It says here that the place used to be called Camp Grizzly, but it was bought by this rich lady named Madeline." Hobbes noted, ignoring Calvin's declaration. "Madeline Mann's her full name. She's the one who renamed the place to Camp Scientist. Apparently, she's one of the counselors there."

"Well, that's a stupid name!" Calvin said. "Madeline Mann?! Why are all these last names so idiotic?!"

"Good question." muttered Hobbes. "We'll have to look it up when we get back."

Calvin ignored him and continued his rant. Everyone in the vehicle turned toward him to listen - With the exception of the bus driver, of course. Any good bus driver should know that taking their eyes off the road would usually have catastrophic results. Thankfully, this bus driver kept his eyes on the road, his focus absolute. An outstanding driver, he was.

As Calvin's rant went on and on, the bus suddenly came to a halt. "What the-?"

He was interrupted as the doors flung open, giving a good view of what had to be Camp Scientist. Either he had been bored out of his mind for longer than he thought, or the drive had been shorter than he thought, because they had finally reached their destination.

"Alright, everyone." said the bus driver. "We're here. Go out and stretch you legs and run around or whatever."

The most active kids came out first, dashing out like miniature bolts of lightning. They were followed by the rest of the passengers, pushing and shoving to get through the cramped space and out the door. The kids who had fallen asleep during the ride trailed behind, slowly dragging their feet as fast as their half-asleep brains could move them.

Calvin, on the other hand, had different ideas.

"Hey, Calvin?" asked Hobbes. "We're here. The other kids are all going out."

"Shhh!" Calvin shushed him. "If they want to give up their freedom, that's fine by me, but I'm staying. If we stay silent back here, the bus driver will think everyone has already left. He'll bring the bus back to wherever buses stay. After that, we'll sneak out and figure out our way back home from there."

"Ah." said Hobbes. "Wait, how are we supposed to get back from the bus... Station... Whatever? We can't even find our way back from the woods in your backyard."

"One step at a time, Hobbo." Calvin said confidently. "First, we just need him to drive back."

"I can hear you back there." said the bus driver. Calvin and Hobbes froze. "And no, I'm not going to drive back until you two leave."

"Stay silent." Calvin hissed. "Make him think he's just hallucinating. He'll give up eventually."

"I know I am not hallucinating." the driver added. "And I also know that the counselors are giving out free money to whoever gets to the gathering area first."

Now he had Calvin's attention. "Free money?" he asked, peeking out from behind the chair and abandoning all stealth. Hobbes rolled his eyes. "Ah yes, the pinnacle of stealth."

"Oh yeah." replied the bus driver. "They'll give out a full twenty bucks to whoever gets there first. Protip: If you need to make up for lost time (Which you do, by the way), run as fast as your little legs can carry you."

"COME ON, HOBBES!" Calvin shouted, rushing out the door. "WE'VE GOT A FREE TWENTY DOLLARS WAITING FOR US!"

Hobbes sighed, picked up the backpack that Calvin had conveniently decided not to carry, and followed him out.

The bus driver chuckled as the spiky-haired chump bolted out the doors at incredibly high speeds. "Works every time."


Panting heavily, Calvin skidded to a halt in front of the counselor's cabin, Hobbes trailing beside him. A man was standing in front of the kids, listing off their names. He was middle-aged, and was wearing a Hawaiian shirt, shorts, shades and sandals. Really, he looked more like a tourist than a counselor. The man had black hair and a bushy mustache. Written on his name tag was "Mr. Bill." In terms of appearance, he sorta reminded Calvin of his Uncle Max.

But that wasn't important. What was important was that there was a crowd of kids gathered around the cabin, meaning Calvin couldn't be the first one to get to the gathering area, and therefore wouldn't be getting the free twenty bucks.

"Darn it." he muttered. "A free twenty bucks, gone."

"If it helps, he was probably lying and there wasn't any twenty bucks in the first place.." Hobbes pointed out, dropping the backpack. "Then again, that would mean you just blew our cover for nothing, so that probably doesn't help. In which case, just ignore me."

"Calvin Watterson." called Mr. Bill.

"What?" asked Calvin, his train of thought interrupted. Hs attempt to throttle Hobbes was nipped in the bud.

Mr. Bill wrote down Calvin's name on the clipboard in his hands. "Now that we have everyone here, I'd like to go over the rules of the camp. There will be no littering, no bullying, no aggressiveness or violence, no breaking camp equipment..."

Calvin began zoning out. He never really cared about rules. Rules, rules, rules. Do this, don't do that, it's to keep order, blah blah blah. Order, Calvin's butt. They were just an excuse to limit his freedom.

After a couple minutes, or hours, or however long the explanation took, the listing of the rules came to an end. "If you ever forget the rules, they're pinned up on the walls of our sleeping cabins, and in the cabins you'll be staying in. Moving on, we'll also be assigning every camper a partner."

Calvin let out a groan. He positively hated working with other people. Always yelling at him, calling him out for being a weirdo, smashing him into walls, the list went on. Evidently, his opinion was shared, because a couple other kids pitched in as well.

"Here at Camp Scientist," Mr. Bill went on. "We greatly value and encourage teamwork. Because of this, we make sure that everyone has a partner-And a friend-when they come to this camp."

Mr. Bill began listing off names and calling campers up. Meanwhile, Calvin clasped his hands and started praying. "Pleasenotsusiepleasenotsusiepleasenotsusie..." he whispered desperately.

Hobbes just covered his ears, anticipating Calvin's inevitable explosion.

"Susie and Candace." Mr. Bill said. Susie and Candace walked out from the crowd, chatting happily as Mr. Bill pointed out the cabin they would be staying in.

Calvin let out a breath. At the very least, he wouldn't have to put up with Susie for the entirety of the already-torturous stay. Hobbes exhaled too, and tentatively took his hands off his ears. Perhaps he would escape with his eardrums unscathed today.

Mr. Bill continued listing off pairs, until finally, he got to Calvin. "Calvin and Sakura."

Calvin grumbled and began walking up to him, dragging his feet as he went. He was never really a "people" person. They would always shout at him for being weird, for messing up the group project with his T-Rex doodles and alien comics instead of actually working. Well, either that or they (i.e. Moe) were just punching him into walls. Hobbes was the only one who Calvin could really stand, and that was only half the time anyways. Speaking of which, Hobbes picked up the backpack and followed him, because someone had to do it and it was clear Calvin wasn't.

Calvin stopped in front of Mr. Bill, as did his new partner. Sakura, apparently. Weird name, if you asked Calvin. Certainly wasn't something you heard on the streets or on television.

"Calvin, this is Sakura." said Mr. Bill. "Sakura, this is Calvin. I know this the first time at Camp Scientist for both of you, but we aim to make this a great first impression. For a start, making some new friends and getting to know each other should certainly help. It's always more fun with a group." He winked, and walked away.

Calvin turned to his new partner. He'd be stuck with her for the next week, but he wouldn't go down without kicking and screaming all the way. He'd make sure of that.

The girl-Sakura-simply waved at him. She had black hair, tied into pigtails. Her clothing consisted of a skirt, blue on top and pink near the bottom, with a flower on the top. The flower itself had pink petals and a yellow center. She was also wearing black socks that went just above her knees.

Then Calvin noticed her eyes. Well, one of them, at least. Her left eye wasn't very noteworthy. It was a nice, standard light blue, much like Calvin's eyes. Her right eye, on the other hand, was quite bizarre. It was a deep crimson color, like a ruby. Not something that normally occurs in humans. It was quite jarring, Calvin thought.

"What's up with your eye?" Calvin blurted.

"Good question." said an unfamiliar voice. Turning to the source of the noise, Calvin came face-to-face with a robot, a little taller than he was.

They looked to be made of black plastic, like one of those nifty AI toys that have started popping up nowadays. The arms started with a silvery rod, then went into black cylinder, followed by the hands themselves, connected by a circular joint. The legs followed the same formula, just ending in boot-like feet rather than hands. Cyan rings, softly glowing, went across their body; Specifically, one around the abdomen, and one for each arm and leg, close to the hands and feet.

Their main body was cylindrical, somewhat like a barrel. The head was round, though not a complete circle; It was a bit flatter on the bottom than on top. Two large, glowing blue lenses functioned as eyes. Lastly, a small dome was embedded in their chest, glowing like the rings.

"This is my friend, Nikola." Sakura said, casually gesturing towards the robot.

"Hey." said the robot-Nikola, apparently. He put his hands behind his head in a relaxed manner. "I'm Nikola. I follow Sakura around and snark at people when they do stupid things worthy of a reaction. Other than that, I don't really do much."

Hobbes finally came up to them, zipping up the backpack and irritably muttering under his breath. "And just my luck, the guy doesn't even zip up the darn thing..." He looked up, saw Nikola, and groaned. "And we literally just got here and there's already robots. Yeah, no, I'm gonna leave before anything else happens."

He then promptly dropped the backpack and bolted in the other direction, leaving a trail of dust in his wake.

"HEY!" Calvin shouted, running after him as fast as his little legs could carry him. "GET BACK HERE!"

Nikola and Sakura watched as Calvin chased after Hobbes, shouting about how they were "all in this together." Nikola sighed.

"Case in point, stupid things worthy of a reaction. We're off to a truly wonderful start here."


Note: And done. That took much longer than it should have. I'll try to pick up the pace, but my attention has been elsewhere lately, namely on this cool little site called Fantendo. No promises that I'll go any faster. Granted, four freakin' months is a pretty low bar to clear...

Anyways, I'll see you next time (Whenever that is).