Quick little one-shot I've made as a present.


It was a nice, sunny winter morning in Vice City. The skies were clear, save for the helicopters of course, people bustled about the city trying to live their lives normally, all while trying to avoid the constant gang violence and drug trafficking that went on in the city. To many, the constant strife and crime, bore a weight of warring anger and stress on their lives, even on days of Christmas chime and cheer on this month of Christmas time. Which was understandable, given how much kept going on in the city.

But to Lance Vance, this was just the average day to him. So much that Lance Vance almost couldn't have been bothered to wake up to the shooting outside his house, only barely opening his whacked eyes to the sound and yelling from outside. "Lance, get your ass out here you lazy, coke-snorting son of a bitch! We've got work to do today!"

Groaning, Lance got out of his bedroom, his fiery eyes scanning over the room. The house was just as it usually was, three black couches, wooden blinds, white tiger carpet, this room said everything one needed to know about the slick, black dancin' man Lance Vance and his brother, who was in a picture on the counter, the picture being of their younger days. Before making his way to him, he quickly grabbed a deli sandwich with a sign saying 'for emergencies', stuck it in a microwave for a minute, before taking it out and going downstairs into the large parkway. There he saw bodies, and no one else but his own brother Vic Vance, who had taken out a group of goons with only him and two of his other gang buddies. The gang members looked at Lance warily as he approached.

"Man, what the hell was all that noise?" Lance said as he gave a yawn, before taking a bite out of his deli. "I was whacked, man. You don't do that."

"Oh shut it, why won't ya?" Vic said as he walked up to him, no gun in his hand.

"We were just doing our job, boss." The two said nervously as they looked to each other. "Guys were getting on your turf with some guns. Couldn't let you wake up with a knife to your throat, right?"

"And if it weren't for me putting them here for you at your request," Vic said as he pointed to them. "You would've been dead already! Now if you're done bitching, I got work for you."

Lance Vance growled in annoyance as he stared at Vic, as one of the two henchmen whispered into the other's ear. Lance didn't care for it as he spoke. "Why you always gotta be like that?"

"You've got free time, don't you? That Tommy kid has been upstaging us, so we might as well do something productive." Vic said before he then pulled out a pocket-sized calendar from his pocket. It had multiple various dates crossed out, a big red circle on the 24th. "Do you know what day it is? The forecast for the week even?"

Lance looked to one of the henchmen. "What day is it?"

"Monday, about a week until Christmas."

"A WEEK, Lance!" Vic yelled at him, all wound up this early in the morning. "And guess what else?"

"...There ain't gonna be no goddamn snow on Christmas, is there?"

He couldn't hear what one of the henchmen said, but it was loud and clear what Vic had said. "You're goddamn right there's not going to be any snow because we're stuck in goddamn Florida instead of being with Aunt Enid and Pete! And Christmas always, ALWAYS goes with snow everywhere you see it on TV, and this will be the year that she'll be having her first Christmas!"

The two henchmen looked awkwardly at each other, before getting back to their posts, muttering to themselves. Lance couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. "So get snow?"

"Not the drug kind." Vic sternly said as he stared Lance right in the eyes. "I don't want my daughter getting into drugs at 3. In fact, I want her to keep the promise of not doing any more damn drugs, that our asses broke."

Lance wasn't convinced. It didn't seem like his brother would struggle over something like this, but he nodded. "So what's the trouble?"

"The trouble is that the goddamn Mendez brothers have stolen all the fake snow. Every, last, bit of it!" He accentuated each bit with a clap of his hands. "And spread it all over the city! So you're gonna help me out, and cover one half of the city, while I go cover the other."

"Hey, hey, chill bro!" Lance said as he gave an idle thumbs up to his brother Vic. "I got this! Just, uh... lemme go grab some stuff real quick."

With the Christmas spirit allowing him to push past his tiredness, Lance went back into his luxurious abode, Vic giving him a glare all the while. He immediately went over into the closet area in his room and opened up his safe to begin his morning routine. He first went for his usual pills, the ones that made him happy and kept the pain away. As he took a couple, he could feel his heart quicken, his body seemingly becoming energized as everything seemed to move fast. He then went for the bag of cocaine, the high-quality kind he saved for emergencies.

"First cocaine, and now that too huh?"

Lance Vance nearly had a damn heart attack, as he scrambled around a bit to face Vic. "Jeez Vic, at least knock before you enter!"

"If you would lock the damn door more, maybe I would feel like I had to. But your dumb ass keeps forgetting to lock it."

"That doesn't mean-"

"Why don't you just let more people in the house, huh? No need to knock! Since there ain't ever a lock!"

Lance had to sigh. He was always like this, and he never really could relax. Lance didn't even think he ever had alcohol, much less the touch of a woman even though he's with one. Goddamn normie that man is. "Yeah, well if anyone's down to fuck with Lance, they're gonna have to endure the Lance Vance Dance."

"Yeah, I'm certain that you can sure as hell beat their asses when they probably have a gun or something," Vic said sarcastically with a roll of his eyes. "Get your ass up. I don't know why you keep me with you."

Lance got himself off the floor without a sound. He was well prepared anyhow, he knew where to go to actually get set up, something that he did when he went to the garage to get the guns from his trunk. The garage smelled almost like death as he opened the door to it, the door closed as garbage and tools were strewn about the floor.

"Think I should carry an M14?" Lance asked as he kept his focus on the guns.

"It mowed down those Cholo like they were nothing," Vic commented as he peered from the side. "Ain't no minigun, but we're not looking to mow down everyone. We're looking to get our snow."

"Should pack some kind of heat though." Lance thought as he looked at all the guns. He inevitably decided he'd carry a couple of MP5s on his sides, a Glock in his pocket, and leave an M16 on his back.

Lance didn't think it was that necessary to just go all out as well. His brother had an empire that easily held weight in Vice City, and while it wasn't the best, it could easily get some.

So how come there wasn't enough?

Lance decided to hit the mall first things first as he opened the garage and drove, leaving the firepower in the back of the car and leaving it locked. It was always as Aunt Janet said, get the low hanging fruit before there's nothing but high hanging fruit left... and stop being part of drugs. She wasn't really fun, but at least she cared. Maybe not as much as Vic did though.


"What do you mean 'we don't have it'?!"

The store clerk had to compose himself for a moment before responding. "It means, we don't have it. I know you're a bit messed up at the moment, but come on man, we don't got what you need." Lance genuinely couldn't believe it. "It's not here."

"Told you."

Lance just about yelled in frustration, not hearing the mutter the store clerk gave. How could it possibly be the case? Fake snow is so everywhere, you don't even need a where or when. It was flat out THE most common thing you could find outside of the drug trade!

So why would anyone want it?

Lance left the mall shortly after a quick look around and getting some water. He'll figure this out one way or another.


No snow.

Not a single bit of snow after four days passed. He had searched all over the city, looked into the neighboring areas, accessed his contacts, nobody in Vice City was at all interested in Christmas! There weren't even any signs of planes getting ready to drop snow down on the area! It was like it was all bought!

But who buys snow just to spite someone's day?

And it was this, Lance dwelt on for a while, wondering what could've possibly happened to all the snow. He looked for information as to why there was no snow coming. He was surprised to find the reason was the city itself. The governor had ordered a lockdown, stating that Christmas couldn't be safely practiced due to the rampant crime on the streets and that it would be ill-advised to wander about during this time getting gifts. This in turn stopped snow from coming into the city, and half the counties in the state were following his lead.

"This motherfucker..." Vic said coldly as he peered over his shoulder. Wordlessly, Lance called his contacts once more and asked about his activity Unsurprisingly, the mayor had also been breaking his own jurisdiction. He had been found at restaurants dining with well over a dozen guests. Getting a large variety of toys, no doubt to sell in surplus as a 'Christmas Miracle', so that there'd be a late Christmas rush to get what the other kids needed for bullshit prices. He's even got the largest tree of the bunch in his house.

But the worst of it all, the absolute scummiest thing Lance had ever seen? He has the largest amount of Martini, Punch, Champagne, Sangria, everything one could imagine for Christmas, all kept by him so he could make the biggest Christmas party all to himself and a few select people. And he thought that he could even have it right here in Vice City, with nothing but a gun-smuggling cartel to back him. Basically disrespecting the cocaine business here that he had a hold on, and pretty much daring them to come at him.

That army ain't shit to Lance Vance. He just thrown everyone's Christmas in the trash, and they expect one of the best traffickers out there, him, to just ignore it? "I think we both know what we're gonna do here."

"Rock paper scissors first!"

"You gotta be shitting me!"

Lance's luck was on his side this time. And this time, he'd be the one finishing the fight.


They flew above the streets, golden light shining down upon their helicopter as they cast a shadow upon the city, searching for the escort vehicles while having some crew down below be ready to hand them over a motorcycle in case they needed to chase on the ground. They weren't using anything drastic, the army helicopter could be used for something better than a hit and run mission, but they were still flying above from a distance regardless, acting as normal Vice City helicopters while secretly spying on the streets. Victor still wasn't willing to fly, however, so they hired someone else to fly their helicopter. It didn't take long for them to see some odd movement around Downtown Vice City.

They flew through the skies, like cats stalking their prey. They followed the mayor all the way up to Washington beach, who was guarded by dozens of army jeeps. The mayor was blissfully unaware of them, as they wanted him to be. They watched as they set up his little party on the beach. It was eventually seen that he was right about everything he heard.

"Charles, you know the plan." Lance said to the driver, as he got ready to jump with the parachute on his back. He had brought some grenades to the party as well, having them on a belt he put on for the occasion as he held his M16. Though still didn't need to bring out the minigun. Fool had put himself right out in the open.

"Understood boss! I'll call in some motorbikes for us to use while I drop this on him." Charles said as he began prepping the helicopter for, what one would say to be a 'happy landing'.

As soon as the helicopter had finished rearing up and charging down to the mayor at full speeds, Lance and the pilot jumped out of the helicopter, the pilot mainly aiming to get on the ground, Lance charging straight at the mayor and his group. Nobody survives the Lance Vance Dance unless he wanted them to!

The soldiers only had a few moments to notice what was going on, completely ignoring him as they watched the helicopter barrel straight towards them. The mayor had no chance, the helicopter reaching him long before it had touched anyone else, utterly decimating the unwitting grinch of Christmas. Lance deployed his parachute as all this was happening, getting his momentum to quickly screech to a halt as he laid down a hail mary on the soldiers, throwing a volley of grenades as he did so, shouting out. "You dumb pieces of shit!"

Bullets and explosions sung in Washington Beach, along with panicked shouts and sirens quickly firing off in the distance. Lance soared through their ranks like a spear of justice, laying lead into all of their faces as his hand jutted about, aim switching from soldier to unprepared soldier as they all had little place to hide. By the time he had to reload, there were well over a dozen bodies on the ground, and all cover was either gone or on fire.

The soldiers charged back at him, eager to avenge their fallen comrades. But they couldn't stop him, as Lance flipped and spun in the air like an acrobat around them, firing his MP5s after having dropped his emptied M16. He kicked the knives away, he shoved back when they tackled, leapt around and off their shoulders, all against the soldiers who had little other option. None could keep up with his moves. Nobody could keep up with his moves!

By the time he was done, the soldiers were either on the ground in paralyzing pain, or dead. Lance looked around, making sure there were nobody else that could attack him. His heart had been racing, as if adrenaline had finally waken him up. The people he shot weren't soldiers, the mayor never had that amount of money as he instead had a swat team with him. Lance stared on in confusion, until he realized the lighting was giving off that look.

It was then Tommy Vercetti rolled in a motorbike, anger and confusion on his face as he got off. "Lance, what the fuck are you doing rampaging out here? Half of Vice City heard of what's going on in here!"

Lance looked to Tommy. "Hey man, I was just saving Christmas! That, and Vic needed to get-"

Tommy paused the rant he was about to interrupt him with, a look of realization on his face. "...Lance, just get on the motorcycle."

Lance looked on in confusion, before shrugging. He walked up to it. "Where's Vic's though? I thought I ordered one for us both. Charles should've told you."

"Charles? He's over in Little Haiti, his day off."


This was... an experiment of a sort. I've never written an action scene for modern-day stuff, much less ever played Vice City. All I did for my research on this was watch a longplay of it that spanned for several hours, though I really liked Lance's character! His backstory mainly served as the inspiration to do this one-shot, and writing a character not only in grief, but having hallucinations of their brother was also quite the fun experience!

Well, person I intended this for or not, I hope whoever is reading this enjoys it! Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you're all with your loved ones in these rough times!