(originally posted on AO3)

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Sanctuary

After seeing the car explode, he had fled blindly, scared beyond belief and lost in a flashback that merged with the harsh reality of losing even more people close to him - people who had taken him in and who had cared for and loved him.

It took hours before reason and rational thought resurfaced. When it did, he was curled up in some shady street corner, half hidden behind dumpsters. The streets around him were unfamiliar. He hadn't learned the lay of the land well during the last few days they had been here.

With the explosion and the loss of lives, there was nothing holding him here anymore and he only knew of one place where the world might make sense again.

It was instinct that guided him from then on.

A trip to the airport.

The purchase of a ticket.

Getting onboard the plane.

There had been a lot of flights within the last few years so he knew how to behave in a setting like that. He hoped he would be able to blend in and remain inconspicuous, hoped that no one would question his presence or the validity of him traveling alone. He wasn't sure what he would do if he were to be stopped and questioned.

Taking his seat, he instantly turned to face the window. Only then did he allow the tears to fall, grieving for what he had lost… now and back then. Emptiness settled over him; his family was gone. He still remembered that feeling, having felt it years ago when he had lost his brother. He had been caught then, a new family materializing out of nowhere, cushioning his fall.

That wouldn't happen this time. There was no one left of his family. Just one man remained, a man who was unrelated to him but who had reached out to him during the darkest hours, a man who had first caught his fall and who he felt safe with.

He squeezed his eyes shut and curled in on himself, leaning his head against the interior wall of the plane. Reaching up to wipe the tears of loss and pain away, he fought to keep himself together.

Pretending to be asleep, he was left alone by his fellow passengers and the flight attendants. When they descended on LAX nearly eight hours later, he felt no closer to clarity or calmness than he had before, even though he knew he was closer to where he needed to be to allow himself to fall apart and be caught.

Fearing customs checks, but hoping they wouldn't look too closely at him due to the nature of his passport, he waited in line, shuffling forward, leaving his past behind with every additional minute, every step he took. He felt raw and out of sorts, out of touch with himself and reality. Around him, people went about their daily business, while his own world had imploded and he was floundering, refusing to reach out until he met with the one he knew would be able to catch his fall and - if not make things alright, at least provide shelter and comfort.

Breathing a sigh of relief when he was waved through customs without questions, he quickly left the airport.

He still remembered where he had to go. He hoped nothing about the location had changed since he had last been there.

The cabby watched him somewhat warily until he held up the credit card that had brought him here in the first place. Afterwards, the man was courteous and cheerful, if asking too many questions. He offered grunts or silences in return and eventually the man got the hint that he didn't want to talk about why he was in Los Angeles or what he was planning to do.

The cabby let him out in front of the UCLA Marina Aquatic Center as asked. He waited until the car was gone before he turned and walked back towards the boatshed. It was mid morning, but he hoped he would find the man his subconscious had brought him here for. And if he weren't there, he was sure he would appear soon… as soon as he knew about his presence.

At lest he hoped so.

He needed him just as badly now as he had needed him years ago.

Swallowing the sob, his steps fell faster and faster until was running the last of the way, despair and pain tumbling through him and urging him on. His vision started blurring as tears swam in his eyes.

He just wanted to go home… to his family.

But they were gone.

He barely stopped to open the door before he barreled into the boatshed… only to backpedal and skid to a stop when three guns were leveled at him, the sound of safeties clicking off loud even over the rushing of blood in his ears.

Still, his eyes honed in on the man he had come for, the only one he had ever felt safe with aside of his family. "Grisha," he sobbed, tears now falling in earnest.

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