Chapter One

December 24, 2012

Anna was very quiet now. She was adjusting the pillow on Robert's bed. Not because it needed adjusting but because she did not know what to do with her hands. She had this nervous energy now. Patrick and Emma had just left and all she could do was think about who was not here this year. Think about the man who had been in a coma for about a week now. Who was she supposed to talk to about this gaping hole in her heart now? Robert was the only one who truly understood.

"I don't know how to do this without you Scorpio. You have always been my lifeline and you still are. I do not know how to live in a world without our girl and I need you here to help me figure out how to survive it. I need you Robert. God how I need you. You need to open your eyes. You need to come back to me. Damn it Scorpio. Do not do this to me. Do not leave me too. I won't survive it."

"Anna."

Her breath caught in her throat, as his voice registered. She was almost numb from fear as she shuddered away from him. She could still see Faison's face in her mind as she looked at Duke. She wanted to wash her hands again. Cleanse herself from the filth that she could still feel on her body.

"I hate that you are afraid of me," Duke admits. She lifts her head slightly, tears slipping down her cheeks. She did not want him to see her like this but she could not seem to stop herself.

"Duke I'm-I'm sorry."

She knew this was difficult for him too; she just wished that he did not seem so put off by it. It was not as if she was in control of her emotions right now. She did not ask to be deceived in this way. Duke noticed the tremor in her voice and wisely took a step back.

"I hate that it is him that you need Anna. Even in a coma, you need him more than you ever needed me."

She turned away from him then. What could she possibly say to him? She had always needed Robert. He was right about that. She was not going to apologize either.

"You need sleep Anna," Duke continued. "You need to eat. You have barely left his side since we found him."

She rubbed the back of her neck as she took a deep breath; let it out slowly. She was tired of having this same argument with him.

"I'm not leaving him Duke. "

"Oh come on Anna. Tomorrow is Christmas. Emma is going to want to see you. You can come back to see Robert after she has opened her presents. "

"I said I am not leaving him Duke. What part of that do you not understand? Robert's family is bringing Christmas here. They need him as much as I do."

Unlikely, Duke thought. He had dreamed of seeing her again for years. She had been the only thing that made him want to keep fighting. The thought of having a life with her again. It had only been a week since he had reconnected with her, but it was clear that Robert was the man in her life now. It pained him to think that she was more committed to her comatose ex then she was to him but he could not deny what was right in front of his eyes. She was beside herself without Robert.

"Anna I…"

What could he possibly say to her? He had no say in her life now. He was not her husband or her fiancé or even her boyfriend. He was just someone she used to know. If she wanted to spend all her time holding Robert's hand while his brother took over her duties as Police Commissioner then she had every right to do so. How could he tell her she was wrong when it was clear that Robert was the only thing keeping her together?

"I will go now. Just please…please try to get some sleep. You will do Robert no good if you are dead on your feet."

She said nothing. What could she possibly say to him when she knew she could not sleep with Robert in a coma? If she closed her eyes now, all she would see is Faison's face taunting her. She would see Robert dying in her arms. Robin locked in the lab while it exploded. Her baby girl Leora taking her final breaths. She did not want those nightmares anymore. She needed to be sure Robert was still breathing.

She pulled her chair closer to his bed. She put her head on his chest so she could hear his heart beat. It was faint but it was there. That was all she needed to know tonight. Tonight Robert was alive. That meant everything to her.


She wraps her arms around herself, her skin numb from the bitter cold of the lab. Lucky takes his jacket off and wraps it around her bare shoulders, noting how she seems to shrink away from him when he does. He wonders what she is thinking now. What she is too afraid to say aloud.

"Robin."

She is shaking now and he does not know whether he should reach out and touch her or if he should stay where he is. He can see the pain behind her eyes and he wishes he had the words to heal her broken soul.

"He's gone okay. For tonight at least. I am not going to let him hurt you."

She takes a deep breath; lets it out slowly. She takes another. Lucky is silent while she focuses on her breathing. Then she scoots a little closer to him.

"Are we ever going to get out of here Lucky," she asks. There is a slight tremor in her voice and he understands what she is really asking. How long can he protect her from Faison? How long before he separates them and she has no choice but to surrender.

"Look at me Robin," he pleads. "Look at me."

The softness in his voice reminds her of her dad so she lifts her chin to look at him. She still prays every night that her dad will be okay. She would never survive losing him again. She just would not.

"We are going to get out of here Robin. I do not know when and I do not know how but we will. Somehow we will."

"But what if we are too late," she cries. "What if…"

Her words die in her throat as Lucky embraces her. He knows she is worried about her dad.

"Robin it's okay. Your dad is not going to die. He has survived so much worse than that bitch. He'll pull through this and when he does…"

"But what if we don't have that kind of time Lucky…what if Faison…"

Tears cascade down her cheeks as he holds her close. He has never seen Robin so fragile. He would kill that bastard if he could.

"I will never let anything happen to you okay. I know he wants to turn you into your mom but he is not going to get the chance. I will not let him hurt you that way. I promise."

"But look at your face," she says, caressing the side of his cheek where another bruise had formed. "He could kill you."

"Don't worry about me okay. I have survived much worse."

"But I do worry Lucky. You are my friend. You shouldn't have to get beat up protecting me."

"I will never be the kind of guy that does nothing when a woman is attacked. Try to relax Robin. You need to save your strength."

She forces a smile as he sits back against the wall. There was only one cot in this room.

"Come on Lucky. This is ridiculous. You cannot get any sleep on the floor. We can share."

"Are you-Are you sure? I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable after everything you have been through."

"I think I will be okay. We are not doing ourselves any good not sleeping."

He stands up, stretches his legs, and then climbs onto the cot. Robin walks over to the counter where her dose of meds is sitting and swallows them. Then she slides into bed next to him. They have to get real close for them to fit but Robin is tiny so it does not take much time at all.

"Lucky," she asks.

"Yeah."

"Would it be too much if I asked you to sing to me? When I was a little girl and I could not sleep, my dad used to sing. It did not matter that he did not have the best singing voice. I thought he hung the moon."

He smiles as he feels her start to relax into him. Times like these really open your eyes to what is important. He was not surprised that she was thinking of a time when she felt safe when so much of right now is uncertain.

"I'm honored that you think I'm a suitable replacement for the great Robert Scorpio," he quips.

"It's not like I have any other options," she responds.

"Any requests?"

"Surprise me."

She closes her eyes when she hears the sound of Lucky's quiet harmonies. She was grateful that she was not stuck in this hellhole alone. They were helping each other survive.


Holly had seen the news reports on Robert's medical condition. There was not much information given but it was enough so that she knew that Anna was sitting vigil by his side. Of course, it would be Anna, she thought bitterly. Of course, she would be the one he wanted there.

Which, of course, was what hurt the most. To know that if Robert could choose who he wanted by his side, it would always be Anna. Anna, Anna, Anna.

Even when the so-called love of her life returns from the great beyond, she still chooses to sit at Robert's bedside rather than work on their relationship. What in the hell was wrong with her? Why did she still have to keep Robert so close to her side, even when she already had someone else in her life? It was not fair. It was not fair that Anna had two men in her life that wanted her and she still wanted to have them both. What about her? Why couldn't she ever manage to keep even one man while Anna managed to keep all her former lover's wanting more? What was she doing wrong? What did Anna have that she did not?

It did not matter that he was comatose; she knew that as soon as he woke up, she would be all over him again. It hurt to know that Robert would never be anything but in love with Anna. Nobody else ever stood a chance. Especially not her. Not even returning from the dead had stopped Robert from loving Anna. He had chosen her then and he would choose her now. Anna, Anna, Anna. It was always about Anna for him.


The tick tock of the clock on the wall might as well have been the timer of a bomb in the still of the night. The footsteps down the hall sound unusually loud as they echo in her ear. Everything seems amplified now. The only thing her frazzled mind can comprehend is that someone was coming for Robert. Someone was coming to finish the job.

Over my dead body, she thinks, instantly reaching for her gun. Her mind might be operating on five percent battery, but her weathered heart was alert and ready. Adrenaline rushed through her, her heart thumping in her chest as her body sprang to life.

"Jesus Anna, put the gun down," Bobbie exclaimed. "It's just me."

"Oh my God Bobbie, I am so sorry. "

"A little on edge I see," she quipped.

She took a few calming breaths as she ran her hand through her hair. "I don't know what I was thinking. All I could think about was that someone was coming to finish the job and I had to protect him."

Bobbie put Robert's chart down and took Anna's hands into hers.

"Anna, I know you are worried but you have to stop doing this to yourself. Robert is getting the best care possible. You know we are going to do whatever we can to help him get better. You know that right?"

A single tear rolls down her cheek as she looks at Bobbie.

"I should have been with him Bobbie. Whoever did this to him would not have had the chance to get the jump on him, if I had been there to cover him. We are partners Bobbie. I never should have left him without any backup."

"Anna, this is not your fault. I do not know all the details but I know you and Robert are good at what you do. There was no reason for you to think he would not be able to take care of himself. Do not blame yourself. Robert never would."

"I know he wouldn't. He also would not have let me go off without any backup. He is in a coma Bobbie. What if he never wakes up? How am I supposed to deal with the fact that Duke is the reason Robert is not here with me on my first Christmas without Robin?"

"Is that really how you feel sweetheart?"

"What if it is? Does that make me a terrible person?"

"Anna, you have not gotten any sleep since Robert went into a coma. You are still reeling from Robin's death. You just found out that Duke is alive. That the man you thought was Duke was really Faison. Now Robert is in a coma and you are afraid you are going to lose him too. Your thought process does not have to make sense to the rest of us. I think it makes perfect sense to you. "

"Is that why I have been pushing him away? Why I cannot seem to connect with him?

"Anna, it has only been a week. Of course, you have reservations. Give it time. You need to deal with your emotions. You need to sleep."

"I can't sleep Bobbie. I can't."

Bobbie puts an arm around her shoulder and leads her over to the bed.

"You get into that bed right next to him if you have to. You take those sleeping pills Patrick gave you. Nobody can survive without sleeping. Your body needs to recover."

"Bobbie, its Christmas. Robert's family, along with Patrick and Emma are coming in a couple of hours."

"Then I will call them and tell them not to come so early. You need sleep Anna. Please do not fight it. If you cannot do it for yourself then do it for Robert. You know damn well he would not want this for you."

"You play dirty pool nurse Spencer."

"Only when I care about someone."

She hands her a glass of water and she reaches for the pills. She climbs into the bed next to Robert after taking them and Bobbie covers her with a blanket.

"Sleep Anna. I will be right here if it will make you feel better."

"Thank you Bobbie," she whispers. "Thank you."

She kisses the top of her head and moves to sit on the chair. She watches as Anna cuddles in closer to Robert and puts her head on his chest and closes her eyes. She would wait a little while longer and then she would go. She was almost done with her shift anyways.