...and divide Russia into a thousand Switzerland! - came the crackling voice of America from an old Soviet recording device.

Russia, which had previously been doing anything but listening to the recordings, upon hearing this phrase, immediately pulled away from solving the crossword puzzle and stared blankly at the device. Did he hear correctly? Thousand Switzerland? So, and this is more interesting...

And having turned off all logic, disregarding the threat from America, Russia asked the logical question - Why does he actually need so much? Well, Ivan, in principle, can understand the logic with Switzerland: their banks are probably the best. And watches with hospitals are not inferior to these same banks.
But why does he need so much? Is Switzerland not enough for him? Or banks? Or watch?
And Russia also has such a persistent feeling that Switzerland itself will not be entirely thrilled with such competition. He is so not be entirely thrilled, that he can, with all his inherent neutrality, express his claims to America in a neutral way.. With a neutral right hook. Or maybe a neutral left hook. Or maybe even with a kick.

In general, as Ivan estimated, America will gain little from its heap of Switzerland.
Well, maybe just a bruise.

The next thought that came to mind was connected with the stupidity of America: well, how, forgive me, in Russia, can one thousand Switzerland fit? He would understand - a hundred, but a thousand? He certainly has large territories, but not so much… Only by shaking its head, Russia decided that it was necessary to drive at least some knowledge into Alfred's head. Perhaps even with a crane. Perhaps even with an iron crane.

The last thought became the icing on the cake of this insanity: becoming Switzerland does not seem such a bad idea...

Well, that is, not a thousand, but one such large Switzerland. With his economy, with high GDP...
With his neutrality...

Stop, in what sense of neutrality? Does this mean that he is so neutral to sit there and not to interfere in anything just as neutral? No, of course, the economy is good, but he cannot be neutral in any way. How is it in meetings and without him?
No, Ivan thought, he doesn't need to be Switzerland after all. And God forbid there still new relatives will appear. This thought made Russia shudder. Well, no, he has enough of his relatives!

Once again, glancing at the old device, Ivan sighed: Alfred's idea had failed at the development stage. Getting up from his chair and taking a crossword puzzle, he left the office and once again made sure that the strategist from America will not work and he will not build his personal army of Switzerland.

Still, why does he need so many Switzerland?