"You're WHAT?!"

Although Jimmy Junior flinched as his father hurled a wine bottle across the restaurant, he still maintained his eye contact and kept his resolve.

"I'm marrying Tina Belcher." He repeated. "I just proposed and she said yes."

"James Poplopovich Junior!" The elder Pesto male roared to his son. "Of all the girls in this tide pool of a town you had to pick that psychotic Burger Brat? Next you'll be telling me that I'm going to have to go into business with that ass-clown across the street and hear that foghorn-throated whore he calls a wife…And where do you think you're going?"

"Across the street to break the news to the Belchers." Said Jimmy Junior as he backed out the door. "I can only hope that they take the news with some shred of maturity."

"You leave this restaurant and you're no longer my son." Jimmy Pesto said while waiving a threatening finger.

"You've treated this restaurant more like a son then you've ever treated me, or Ollie and Andy for that matter."

Jimmy Junior closed the door to his father's restaurant and gestured to Tina. She took Jimmy's hand and looked at him compassionately.

"Round two?" he said somewhat jokingly.

"James, after all this time you still underestimate my father?" said Tina. "He's really warmed up to you…"

Jimmy Jr. stared at her.

"…slowly…"

Jimmy Jr. stared harder.

"Well…at least at least he'll be in a room with you." She said as they began to cross the street.


Tina gently walked into her father's eatery. Shop had long since closed, and yet the place was still as lively as it ever was. Gene and Louise were battling each other as to who could survive the longest on the counter's rotating stools while Linda furiously erased Louise's latest "burger of the day" suggestion.

"-because who would want to eat a burger that references a serial killer?" said Linda testily.

"Is this a bad time?" asked Tina.

"Oh. Tina! Jimmy Jr!" said Linda. "No not at all, Louise just thought she was helping your father get rid of all our bacon tomatoes and kale. So how did dinner go-OH MY GOD!"

Tina simply lifted up her hand and showed her mom Jimmy's ring. Gene and Louise rushed over just in time to hear their sister introduce herself as the future Mrs. Pesto.

"The bastard finally did it." Said Louise astonished.

"Welcome to our crappy family." Said Gene.

"Linda? What's wrong?" said Bob poking his head out of the serving window.

"Our tiny Tina just got engaged to Jimmy Junior." Linda Cooed.

Silence.

"Bobby…isn't that nice?" She said again with her voice wavering.

Had he not been standing up, one would have sworn Bob Belcher had suffered a massive heart-attack: he stood shell-shocked by the refrigerator, his knuckles losing blood from gripping the door handle. His eyes dilated and a weak whistle escaped his mouth.

Bob took a deep breath and began to leave the kitchen. He loved his children and tried to support them through thick and thin, but like any parent he always worried when it came to who his children would bring home and introduce as their future spouse; he liked Rudy, seeing him as a calming influence on his rambunctious 19 year old daughter Louise. Gene coming out as bisexual in 9th Grade (while not a surprise) was still a bit of a wildcard. Ultimately, he and Courtney Wheeler began getting serious by the end of high school after their mutual friend Alex moved away. At 23, he and her still found themselves going strong.

Then there was Jimmy Junior and Tina.

The entire populace of Seymour's Bay more than knew to one degree or another of the Belcher/Pesto rivalry, a rivalry that made Lords Capulet and Montague look like drinking buddies. And yet since Tina was in middle school, she had been smitten with Jimmy's eldest son for God knew whatever reason. Bob had been fighting this kid's influence on his daughter's heart for over a decade and found himself losing time and time again.

Now, as he looked at his 25 year old daughter and the man Jimmy Junior had matured into, Bob knew there was only one thing he could do.

"Lin." He said slowly. "Do we have any tomato sauce downstairs?"

"I think we got at least six cans."

"Good, how about Mozzarella cheese and garlic powder. I got an idea for a burger."

"Bobby! Now? Your daughter is-"

Bob whipped out the chalk to his Burger of the day board. Everyone's expression went from tense to ecstatic as they read his musing: You'll always Have a Pizza My Heart Burger. Served with side of Onion Rings. $5.95.

"Jimmy Junior. Call me dad." He said embracing both Tina and her fiancé.


From the front window of his shop, Jimmy Pesto watched his business rival embrace his eldest son. He turned away from the warm tableau and poured a glass of beer from the bar, and another, and another after that. As he sipped at the head, he looked venomously at a picture hanging over the mirror. With an unworldly roar, Jimmy hurled the glass with all his might at the photo, knocking it into the sink in the process. In a drunken stupor, he turned the water on full blast in an effort to mar the image contained within; a sharp-dressed man with his visibly pregnant wife standing outside of a restaurant known as Pesto's Italian Kitchen. Their little girl peeked out from underneath a chalkboard sign bearing the phrase: "you've tried the resto, but have the besto with Pesto!"

"You happy now ya bitter old bastard." Jimmy slurred as the photo finally crumpled and fell into the drain. "WELL?!"