Here is the beginning of the second part! I try to stay timeline consistent, but sometimes it just doesn't work out that way, but nothing too major. Also, this fic will probably be a bit lighter just because it won't be so heavy all the time, but there will be plenty of whump and fluff and h/c because that's what makes a good Steve story imo.

Only the grounding presence of Bucky keeps Steve from bolting out of the Quinjet the moment it lands on the tower.

Instead, he methodically gets up, stretches and leads Bucky out into the sunlight and onto the solid landing pad. He reaches for his shield and tenses. He takes a deep breath. He doesn't have it because Beck and Zemo had taken their stuff and hidden it somewhere. Tony's glasses and gauntlet, Clint's bow, Natasha's widow bites and belt, and his shield are somewhere with some Hydra goon. He walks forward, beckoning a slightly nervous Bucky to follow him.

He leads him down into the common room and kitchen, heading straight for the elevator when he pauses.

"Hey Tony?" He asks.

"Yeah Cap?"

"Can Bucky stay in my guest bedroom for —" he stops, he has no idea how long Bucky will stay.

For all his quip and sarcasm Tony doesn't even hesitate, "Winter Soldier here just saved us from whatever the hell plan those quacks were up to. He can stay as long as he likes."

Surprise crosses Bucky's face and Steve smiles at the ease in which they've just accepted him. "Thanks."

"Thank you," Bucky mumbles quietly, but Tony hears and waves a dismissive hand.

"I'm going to look at these files and data, and try to get a clearer picture of what their plan was…" Tony looks at them. "If and probably when I figure it out… Do you want to know?"

A tightness returns to Steve's throat at the thought. He doesn't want to know… but he probably should know. "Yeah, just let us know."

Tony nods and then is distracted by something in an earpiece, he winces and Steve notices, "What is it Tony?"

"Fury knows, and Secretary Ross."

A cold pit forms in Steve's stomach, "knows what."

Tony continues to listen, his face going gray. "Apparently there was a foil in place. I set it off. I didn't know!" His expression changes into guilt and Steve is still lost.

"You didn't know what, Tony?" He tries to keep the frantic tone out of his voice.

"The tapes. It automatically sent them the tapes."

There is no emotion in Bucky's voice when he asks the question on Steve's mind. "What tapes?"

"The tapes of our sessions." Tony whispers, still listening to something in his earpiece but his eyes very far away. "They recorded the whole thing, including the memories. I didn't even know they could do that. The destruction of the equipment set off the contingency and Fury and Ross got the tapes. Ross— he's coming here tomorrow. He says they need to be addressed…" Tony's eyes snap shut and his hand clutches at his arc reactor.

Steve feels like someone is strangling the air from his lungs and Bucky takes a step forward, "Steve, calm down, your heart rate is way too high, take a deep breath." Steve can barely hear his words as they sound a thousand miles away. He can feel his heartbeat racing. He stumbles towards the elevator and presses the button to his floor with an automatic reflex.

Bucky slides into the elevator car next to him and is still talking to him, hands on the sides of his face, but Steve can't hear what he's saying.

He's being pushed and he doesn't resist. He's pushed onto a bed and made to lie down. He lays there for an indeterminate amount of time, his heart rate slowing and breathing easier, but his brain still on autopilot.

Fury knows. Ross knows. That one is infinitely worse. Steve doesn't even know if he's watched the tapes. It's only been about 3 hours since they've escaped and there's almost 48 hours of footage to go through.

He bolts upright. "FRIDAY?" He asks desperately.

"Yes, Captain?"

"Is there a way you can keep them from watching those files?"

There's too long of a pause, and even though she's an A.I. He feels like she's trying to spare him.

"Sorry Captain Rogers, I do not have access to delete those files."

"It's okay, it was a long shot."

His sense returning to him somewhat, he notices that Bucky is not around. He looks and sees the bathroom light it on, the shower is running.

He waits for a while, but as minutes tick by, Bucky's long shower seems to be abnormally long. He tries to reason that Bucky probably hasn't had normal luxuries like a shower, so he puts it out of his mind, and starts tidying up his already tidy room, trying to keep his mind off Ross and the tapes.

After over an hour, Steve decides something is wrong.

He knocks on the door, "Buck?"

No response.

"Bucky?" He tries again, and dread fills him as there is still no response.

He slowly opens the door and sees Bucky's tactical vest, belt, pants, and weapons folded and lined up neatly on the sink counter and the boots lined neatly under the cabinets.

He steps forward and cautiously turns the corner to enter the shower section of the bathroom. He calls out Bucky's name to warn his friend of his entry.

"Bucky? Hey I don't want to interrupt, just checking to make sure you're o—" He stops short.

Bucky is outside the shower, his metal arm behind him, standing at attention and his flesh hand stuck into the shower spray. His eyes are expressionless.

"Bucky?" No response. Steve steps forward, he lightly touches Bucky's shoulder, "Hey Buck, you okay?"

"I have not broken protocol." Bucky whispers hoarsely.

"What do you mean? What protocol?"

"Asset can't—" he grits his teeth, fighting with himself, "I- haven't taken a shower, I haven't broken protocol."

Steve ignores that fact that Bucky referred to himself in the third person and presses on.

"You're not allowed to take a shower?"

"Not at this temperature."

Steve reaches out and feels the water. It is its normal pleasant temperature, hot but not too hot. Steve had jimmied the water taps with the help of JARVIS back in the day. He'd been unsure how to use the fancy shower and the spray of ice water had sent him straight back to the Valkyrie. He'd laid shivering in the ice water, suffering from flashbacks before JARVIS had intervened. The water had warmed and Steve was able to pull himself back to the present after his normal body temperature had returned.

After requesting JARVIS keep silent about the incident, which he did reluctantly (Steve could tell) he had taken apart the plumbing and made sure that the water in his bathroom was always the same temperature. Never would ice water touch his body again if he had anything to say about it.

Now he stood here, realization dawning across his face.

"You're not allowed to take a warm shower?" The annoyance in his tone makes Bucky take a step back.

"I didn't break protocol. I'm just waiting for the water to turn cold."

Steve reaches his wet hand up to Bucky's shoulder and pulls him into a hug. Bucky stiffens but doesn't push him away.

"Who said you're not allowed to take a warm shower?"

"My handlers."

Steve stiffens, but he won't back down now, he pushes back so he can look Bucky in the eyes. "And are they still your handlers?"

"I— I don't…" Something flashes across Bucky's face and his jaw sets, "No."

"Well then. Sounds like that rule doesn't apply." Bucky visibly sags at the exertion from fighting the internal Hydra commands that have been beaten into him.

Steve steadies him with a hand and asks seriously. "Do you need help? Or can you shower on your own?"

Bucky looks down at his naked form and back up to Steve, a light coming back into his eyes and a flush rising from his neck.

"Oh man." He sighs, rubbing his metal hand over his face.

Steve laughs, a deep sound that lightens the mood.

"Sorry, Steve."

Steve's smile disappears. "Don't you dare apologize for anything."

Bucky looks at him and there isn't an ounce of teasing in his voice. "I don't care what they tried to program into you. You are a human being. You deserve warm showers, a bed," Steve gestures at Bucky's thinner than normal frame, "and enough food, and whatever else you need to be happy and healthy." Steve looks away, guilt rising in his throat. "I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you from them. I'm should have—"

"Stop." Bucky says, his face stretched thin. "Can we have this discussion when I'm not naked, and preferably when we haven't just fought our way out of some psychos' lair?"

Steve laughs a weak laugh and nods. "Yeah, yeah, sure Buck. Sorry, I didn't mean to barge in on you."

"No, Steve, I'm glad you did, who knows how long I would have stood here like an idiot—" his head tips to the side. "How long was it actually?"

"I think about an hour and a half…" Steve guesses, looking at his watch.

"Geez." Then a thought crosses his face, he reaches back into the water, "and it's still warm?"

"It's amazing right?" Steve says, glad someone else finally understands why he's so impressed with that fact. "I even rigged it so it can never spray out cold water." He shivers involuntarily and Bucky's eyes track the movement, something dark flashes over his face but is gone quickly after. Steve hurries on, "you take a shower, I'll find some clothes for you to wear. No rush." He leaves and is glad to hear his friend step into the shower and let out a sigh of happiness at the warmth he's now allowed to have.

After they've both showered and changed, Bucky wearing clothes that are just slightly too big on him, they head out to the kitchen.

Steve looks around the cupboards and in the fridge but there doesn't seem to be much. He only briefly wonders at that before realizing that they've been in capture for over two days, no one has been around to go grocery shopping. He sighs and makes a mental note to go shopping soon.

"Hey, what sounds good for a meal? Looks like we're going to order in"

Bucky gives him a smile and says almost with a reverent tone, "anything I want?" Steve ignores how hard it is to listen to his best friend be shocked to be allowed to pick things that he wants.

"Anything you want, Buck."

"What's good around here?"

"This part of New York? Just about everything. It took me a while to catch up on all the new available food types when I woke up. What have you tried?"

Bucky swallows a little thickly. "I'm not sure. I never really ate real food when— when I was the Asset. Just nutrient replacements and liquids. Eating real food made it hard for them to put me in cryo, so I wasn't allowed to have solids." Bucky's mouth quirks to the side, "And now, I know I've eaten a lot of protein or granola bars. They're easy to snatch off the shelves. And juice, lots of juice. Helps me hit my calorie needs, or get close at least. But other than that? Mostly fruit, whatever I could find in dumpsters or off street carts."

He winces and Steve holds his breath, processing what all he just said.

"There's nothing wrong with what you did." Steve says. "You needed to do what you did to survive, I just wish you hadn't had to. I'm really sorry about not being there to help."

"Steve, stop. I was running from you, remember? I could have let you find me at any time. But I wasn't ready. I'm barely ready now. Shower situation as evidence."

"What shower situation?" Clint asks, breezing into the kitchen. His eyebrows are raised and Steve can see the dirty thought about to exit his mouth when Bucky cuts him off.

"Had to overcome Hydra programming to allow myself to take a warm shower." He says it without emotion and Clint freezes.

Bucky turns to Steve and Steve just shakes his head, chuckling. A smile breaks out across Bucky's face and Clint stares at them.

"Was that supposed to be a joke?"

"Not a joke, but kinda funny." Bucky quips. "It's an Asset thing, you wouldn't get it." He winks at Clint who rolls his eyes and Steve is transported back to the night of the Stark Expo, Bucky winking at the two girls, "come on ladies, they're playing our song."

"You still haven't picked food." Steve says lightly, ignoring the memory.

"I don't know what to pick."

"You guys ordering food?" Clint asks, searching the cabinets and finding them bare just as Steve had. "Can I join?"

"For sure," Steve says with no hesitation. "You wanna ask Natasha too? Maybe Tony? He may be with Pepper, but it'd be good to check."

Even after their ordeal, Steve felt the need to make sure everyone was taken care of, that was his job, he's good at it, or… he was. He sighs and he sees Bucky eyeing him. Time will tell I guess.

"How about Thai?" Clint queries. "There was that new place that opened just a week ago? We haven't tried it yet, and satay sounds so good right now."

Steve eyes Bucky who shrugs. "Never had it, but I'm up for trying it."

Steve nods his assent and Clint goes to call Natasha while Steve has FRIDAY pull up the menu.

Tony is busy but Natasha decides to join them. The food arrives quickly and they begin eating in earnest. Steve eats his dish, a delicious Pad See Ew and has a spring roll. He notices Clint glancing at him often enough that it gets suspicious.

"What is it Clint?" He asks, thinking he must have food on his face or something.

"Are you still hungry?"

"What?"

"Are you full?" Clint asks without pause, staring at him. Steve doesn't answer immediately and Clint's face takes on a new expression, "are you still hungry?"

The memory flashes in front of him. Clint making the joke, him choosing to not eat even when he knows he should eat, the devastation on Clint's face when the memory is flung back in his face. Guilt. Guilt is what is written in Clint's expression.

"Clint, I'm fine. I don-"

"Are you still hungry, Steve?" Bucky's voice cuts him off and he turns to look at the concern in Bucky's eyes. He's only got halfway through his curry and Steve can see that his hands are moving unconsciously towards him, offering his own food up to Steve. The thought of taking any food from Bucky is vile.

"Stop! Stop, I'm fine, I—"

"I ordered three more entrees and three more appetizers. They're on the counter. And there's dessert too." Natasha's calm, even voice cuts through the tension and Steve smiles at her.

"Thanks, Natasha." He doesn't move to get any food and he sees Bucky surreptitiously set his own curry down, not eating anymore. The thought twists his stomach. He is still hungry. He just hadn't planned on dealing with this already.

"What did you get?" He asks her, his voice just a touch strained.

"There's a Pad Thai, Larb, and another curry, massaman— I think. Fresh and fried spring rolls, and fried tofu with peanut sauce." She says it calmly, but her eyes are watching him and Bucky, catching every detail.

"Hmm." He says, pretending to think about it. He gets up and heads over to the counter, picking up whatever dish feels lightest and grabs a spring roll. He walks back and starts eating, keeping up a normal conversation of small talk. Relaxing only when Bucky picks back up his food and begins eating again.

He sees Natasha smile at that too but Clint only watches with eyes that still read guilt.

He finishes a second and third entree, three spring rolls, and the mango sticky rice, feeling more satisfied than he has in months. Bucky has happily agreed to finish up the rest of the appetizers as Clint and Natasha are looking green from having eaten so much.

"I guess getting starved for two days makes you overestimate how much you can eat." Natasha says, with a groan.

"You—" Clint tries again, "You got enough to eat?"

"Yeah, Clint," Steve says genuinely, "I'm good. Promise." He looks over at Bucky who is pretending not to listen. "I won't— I shouldn't have— It's not your fault I did what I did. Being stingy with food… Born when I was? It's a hard habit to break."

"Yeah but I shouldn't have said that, it was a jerk thing to say. Thor eats just as much if not more and I should have known—"

"You couldn't have known, Clint." Steve sighs. "I don't want to hear anymore about this. I'll be making better eating decisions from now on. It's always good to make sure we get the right amount to eat." Even as he says it, his eyes slide to Bucky. As long as Bucky feels unsure about his eating habits, Steve will have to be extra careful. No more skipping meals or under eating. If he wants Bucky to eat right, then he has to too.

When they've finished eating, Steve gets up to go and motions for Bucky to follow, intending to show him his room and get him settled for the night.

"I'll be right there, is that okay? If I stay here for a moment?" Bucky asks, with real concern that Steve might deny him.

Steve takes in Natasha and Clint's shocked faces that must mirror his own.

"No, of course. I mean— of course that's fine, that's totally fine! It's great. No problem. You—you want me to stay?"

"No, you're good. I'll be in the room in a few minutes."

Steve nods good naturedly and turns to leave, he looks at Natasha and she nods. She can take care of him if anything goes wrong. She, out of all of them, knows something of what he has gone through, he's safe with her. He heads to his room, wondering what the next day will bring.

—-

Bucky twiddles his fingers a bit absently. Natasha is eyeing him and Clint is pretending not to. He doesn't know where to start.

"What's up, Barnes?" Natasha asks, her impatience losing out.

He's about to speak when the door opens and Tony walks in, paper bag of leftovers in hand and a phone in the other. They all look up at him and he stops at their stares.

"What? Did I interrupt the Assassins R Us meeting or something?"

Natasha rolls her eyes and goes back to staring at Barnes, waiting.

He clears his throat and starts, noticing that as he speaks Tony walks closer.

"Steve… Steve was small?" He asks, he knows this is true. He saw it in the museum, he's read about it in books, but then looking at the giant who had sat next to him, it was hard to believe.

"Yes. Steve used to be a lot smaller."

"And I knew him then."

"Yes, you've been friends since you were 4-ish." Tony adds in, lounging back on one of the chairs.

"I don't— I can't." He shifts, uncomfortable. "They took a lot of my memories. Some are back, I think… I think most are back. But some are messed up. I think Hydra actually messed up some of them. I don't always know what's true. I was wondering if…" He looks at their faces, no anger, no contempt at him for speaking out of turn, for asking for something. "If you guys could help me. Just by answering honestly when I ask. I need to know what's real and what's Hydra."

"Of course." Comes Natasha's quick and steely reply.

"Anytime you need." Clint tacks on, his face open and earnest.

"We don't know everything, but whatever we do, we are happy to share" Tony says, and he watches the surprise on Natasha's face. He grumbles, "Do I have to remind everyone that this man saved our lives today? Easiest thing to do to answer some questions. But… riddle me this terminator. Why not ask Big Cap himself?"

Bucky shakes his head quickly. "I will. Just not questions about him, or about Hydra stuff. At least as much as possible. I know I can't avoid everything, but I want to avoid the look on his face that he had in the shower." Tony's eyebrows rose and a dirty comment was on his lips when he saw Clint's wide-eyed, vigorous head shaking. Okay, that's a question for another time then.

"He… He would do anything to help me. Even hurt himself. While there aren't things I can avoid, I don't want to hurt him by asking him questions about himself that I should already know. Even if they're just to clarify. Is it okay if I ask you guys?" They nod again and he relaxes. "Good, I just don't want him to be sad that I'm not the same guy I was."

"He's not asking—" Natasha starts.

"He doesn't think—" Clint speaks at the same time.

"He'd never ask you to be the same guy." Natasha says, "he knows what you've gone through. He just wants you to be healthy and safe, and I know he wishes that that would come with some happiness too, eventually."

Bucky nods and smiles. Classic Steve. The comment Steve made about being stingy with food rattles into his mind.

"Did he ever tell you about food during the depression?" Bucky asks.

"Mint water." Clint says reflexively, as if tasting it.

Bucky's eyes widen, "he told you about that? I'm surprised."

"He didn't tell us," Tony says quietly. "Beck showed us." Realization dawns on Bucky and his face turns murderous.

"That scumbag."

"Ditto."

"No arguments here."

"Did it help?"

"What?"

"The mint water?"

Bucky laughs. "Yeah, the mint kind of made you feel like you had eaten something, but it didn't stop Steve from turning into a skeleton." His eyes go far away as he talks, "Mrs. Rogers found out that he wasn't eating when she was at work because he wanted to save the food for her. I'd never seen her so angry in her life. She'd never really yelled at him, not for all the fights, or all the illnesses, or anything. But she laid into him and gave him the lecture of a lifetime when she discovered he'd been putting the soup or beans or whatever it was she had set out for him, back in the pot so there was more for dinner." His eyes got a bit misty. "He's always been terrible at taking care of himself, always looking out for others, so it shouldn't have surprised her and me as much as it did. But when she came home to him passed out on the floor, she about had a conniption fit on him. Best day of my life was watching that punk get chewed out. Mrs. Rogers was the sweetest woman you ever met, but you didn't cross her."

His smile was so soft that Natasha wished Steve was here to see it.

"She sounds like quite the lady." Clint murmured.

"Steve sounds like quite the idiot." Tony suggests.

Bucky glares at him for a moment but then nods in agreement. "Yeah… he is. Best idiot in Brooklyn." He smiles fondly and Natasha can't help but think that they all might fit under that bill at one point or another.

"Wanda and Vision?" She asks, changing the subject

"Still no word, but I don't think they're in trouble."

"How's Banner?"

"He's okay, a little groggy. Probably take a few days to work out of his system. He doesn't want to Hulk Out, so he's doing it the old-fashioned way. And Thor's on Asgard right now, apparently while we were 'under' a huge thing went down and he had to fight off an invasion and all that jazz, so that's why he didn't find us."

They accept this easily, such is life as an avenger. Bucky stands to leave. "Thanks. For the food, and also for being willing to help." They nod and he wanders to the elevator, waving as the door closes.

A beat of silence.

"So, Ross is coming?" Clint ventures.

"Yep." Tony accuentates the 'p' and the pop resounds in the silence.

"You think he's watched the tapes?"

"He's watching them now."

A groan goes up from Clint and Tony nods his agreement at the sentiment.

"But he can't get through all of it, not in that short amount of time."

"He'll be able to go through enough of it."

"For what? What can he possibly gain from going through those tapes?"

"I think he's going to decide if—" He sighs and rakes a hand through his already wild hair. "If there needs to be… follow up."

Natasha stiffens and Clint sputters.

"Follow up of what?"

"Well, he called me asking why Steve wasn't answering his phone. After I told him that his phone got crunched when we were kidnapped he told me he was watching Banner's tapes and was very concerned about what our mental state was after experiencing that." He cringes. "I stupidly told him to not watch the rest and that I'm sure we would all be okay after a bit of a break." He tugs at his goatee and grimaces. "Apparently he wasn't convinced and kept watching. And he's decided that we can't, or in his words, shouldn't be allowed back in combat, without properly dealing with this."

"And how exactly are we supposed to 'deal with this'? In case you haven't noticed, our Capitan took the biggest hit. You think he's going to sit there while Ross dissects every morbid detail!"

"He may not have a choice." Natasha whispers.

Clint whips his head over to her. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"We're in the middle of trying to take down all the extra Hydra heads that have popped up, not to mention the fallout from Sokovia, unless Steve wants to retire, which I think he'll have a hard time doing, knowing what Hydra did to Barnes, he's going to have to get approval from Ross to go back out and fight."

Clint's mouth sets in a grim line. Tony and Natasha don't look pleased either. And the three sit, dreading whatever might come tomorrow.

—-