A/N: This is the sort of dumb fic I envision while lying awake at night. This isn't really an AU; I imagine it more as a deleted scene from the final battle in The Matrix Revolutions.

I don't own The Matrix or any related characters.

Neo and Agent Smith stood on opposite ends of the rainy street inside the Matrix. "Mr. Anderson, welcome back," Agent Smith said. "We missed you." When Neo gave no reply, he added, "Like what I've done with the place?"

"It ends tonight," Neo said.

"Oh, come on, lighten up for once. You're always so serious. Even I laugh every so often."

"When the hell have you ever laughed?"

"Oh, I have. In fact, I'll do it again right now, just to demonstrate that I do have the capacity for laughter." He took off his glasses and then laughed his infamous, creepy-ass laugh – you know the one.

"That's not a laugh, that's a cackle."

"A cackle is a subclass of a laugh, Mr. Anderson."

"For God's sakes, stop calling me that! How many times must I tell you, my name is Neo!"

"There's no need to yell, Mr. Anderson. I'm keeping my cool, after all."

Several of the other Smiths lining the street echoed his sentiment like backup singers, "He's keeping his cool, jackass!"

"Besides," Agent Smith said, "I don't see why you bother fighting me. I've already foreseen my victory here tonight, with a bit of…help…from your precious Oracle."

"The Oracle's word isn't everything," Neo said. "When I lost my sight, I gained a new sense. You see, the Matrix isn't real, but beyond even the real world is another world, one even more real. And in that world dwell a pair of deities known as the Wachowskis, who dictate the course of events of the entire world. I gained the ability to communicate with them, and I learned that it is destined that you will lose this fight. I know what I must do."

"But I have foreseen my victory!" Agent Smith yelled, finally losing his cool.

"Maybe the Wachowskis made you believe that so you'd have a false sense of security going into this fight."

"Your word means nothing to me, Mr. Anderson! You've become so desperate for victory that you've stooped to making up pathetic lies and sixth senses. Your time is up. The rest of me is just going to enjoy the show. We already know that I'm the one that beats you."

A/N: Hope you enjoyed the story! I've got another one-shot I'm working on that's about Deadpool trying to save the world from an infestation of Murder Hornets, so if you're a Marvel fan, be on the lookout for that one!