a/n: Uggggghhhhh. Writer's Block.

Disclaimer: Not you DD.

Title: wizards and duct tape

Words: 453

Summary: A day in the life in the life of two of Earth's Seniors. Pre-High Wizardry.


"Danger!" screeched Peach from her perch. She batted her scarlet wings furiously in the air, trying to gain Tom's attention. "Entropy! Damnation! Improper safety precautions!" She tried to fly upwards to emphasize her point, but the spell had the gravity locked around her as a part of her punishment for scaring the mailman again.

Tom idly flipped the pages of the newspaper. He reclined in the large armchair, a cup of hot coffee in hand. "That's nice, bird."

The lights in the living room suddenly went out. The dogs began to bark outside.

"I toooooold you," crooned Peach in the shadows. "Daaaaaaangeeeeeeer…"

Tom looked in the direction of the basement door. "Carl, was that you using wizardry to fix something?"

A pause from below. "No?"

Tom sighed. He closed the newspaper and put the coffee on the table. "Lying increases entropy," he reminded his partner.

The sound of Carl's footsteps made its way up to the main floor. He poked his head through the door. "So does whatever we pay the electrician!" He stomped down the steps to continue his tinkering, growling, "Fairest and Fallen, greetings and defiance, just work already!" There was a clunk, and Carl started to swear creatively.

The air in the main floor hummed, the lights flickered, and they browned before going out again.

Tom looked at Peach. "He's about to do something stupid, isn't he?"

Peach grumpily said, "Don't look at me, you're the one who allows him to do stupid things." She was still bitter about the grounding Carl had enforced. "He's your problem, now go fix it."

"That's not a prophecy, it's a demand."

"So?"

The lights turned on, but they were sporadically flashing different colors - blues, reds, and greens - and one bulb exploded from somewhere inside the kitchen.

The dogs howled outside in the night.

Against his better judgement but with entropy and the sanity of his house in mind, Tom got to his feet and went to the kitchen to search through the drawers. With a snap of his fingers, the mess of glass near the sink was translocated to the trash, and another snap created a Wizard Light bobbing in the air.

The small radius of blue-white light was enough for Tom to find a roll of duct tape. Tucking it under his arm, he searched for the zipper of Speech, pulled it, and got his manual out.

"Let's see what we have here on home improvement…" The section appeared, and along with a scrolling block of text detailing what Carl was currently doing in the basement. "Oh, you're an idiot. Carl, Carl! Stop whatever you're doing before you create a wormhole." He rushed downstairs, shouting, "And yes, I brought the duct tape!"