Author's Note: So, this fic is focused on the sass-wagon that is Ashley! I wanted to explore her background a bit more, figuring the fact she is able to give such sound advice to Dinah suggests she has experience to draw upon and these experiences shaped her into the sassy coach we've come to love. The overall theme of this fic is darker than my previous works and although I don't plan to be very graphic, I will give warning where it's due prior to each chapter.

A big thanks to Zabbie Q for her invaluable help and advice throughout this writing process and for Beta-reading this 'fic!

This 'fic also introduces my very first OC, Lincoln the diesel.

This first chapter is set before the initial events of my one-shot fic "Got Your Back". Ashley is around eight years old.

As always, I hope you enjoy!


"You're not scared, are you?"

Ashley was certain he already knew the answer. He could probably hear her heart pounding furiously in her chest or see the flash of panic and vulnerability in her eyes as she peered into the great black void in front of her. Just moments prior, she had been full of enthusiasm and conviction, yet that had all but now deserted her. There was no backing out now. Not unless, that is, she wanted to look like a baby in front of him.

It had been Lincoln's idea to come to the disused mining tunnel. The coal steamers had abandoned the shaft years ago after the coal industry began to decline, and the tunnel was deemed unstable and unsafe. Demand for coal had fallen with the rise in prominence of diesel locomotives and power stations had started switching to gas or biomass to produce electricity, meaning the tunnels had fallen redundant. Nowadays, according to Lincoln, the tunnel was seen as a right of passage of sorts: all the young trains had to complete the dare before they'd be accepted into his gang. The dare entailed each train to enter the tunnel to see who could go the furthest, marking their spot on the wall with a piece of chalk. All the popular trains, like Greaseball and Troy, had placed their mark in that very tunnel. Nobody knew how far it stretched as no locomotive had ever reached the end or – as rumours went – no one had ever emerged from its depths after reaching it. At the thought, a shiver ran down Ashley's spine.

"Maybe this isn't such a good idea…" mumbled Hector the steamer beside her as if reading her thoughts.

Hector, renowned for his nervous disposition, had always been shunned by the other trains. He was lanky, with unkempt and often unruly blonde hair under a dusty red hat and round spectacles and although a kindred soul, wasn't the sharpest tool in the box. His clumsiness often landed him in trouble or made him the butt of jokes. He had apparently found some solace in that Ashley also had no friends and he had resorted to following her around like a lost puppy. Ashley had sympathised, knowing how lonely it felt, and therefore didn't protest him tagging along everywhere – he did provide some company after all – although she often found his constant presence irritating. She presumed Lincoln had simply invited him along to the dare as a courtesy, pitying the loner who clung to the girl like a shadow. He retreated several steps back behind her now for reassurance.

Lincoln gave a wry smile, eyeing the girl as if to see how she would react. The smooth-talking diesel seemed to have made it his mission to help the two young outcasts by taking them under his wing. With his slicked-back jet black hair and muscular frame, all the girls worshiped him and his equally popular partner-in-crime Greaseball. Ashley couldn't believe her luck when the diesel had approached her, having witnessed her classmates taunting her in the canteen. She had grown accustomed to the daily torment. Her peers had been quick to notice her mother was a smoking car, and ever since she couldn't even roll down the track to class without one of the girls turning their head, nose wrinkled, to comment "Ew, what's that foul smell?" followed by a torrent of laughter. However, one day that laughter had been silenced when Lincoln had swaggered over to Ashley's table and said "Mind if I join you, Ash?" before sitting beside her to eat lunch. Those stupid girls will think twice about mocking me when they see me hanging out with Lincoln after today, she thought. There was no way she was going to chicken out of a dare in front of him now. This was her chance to finally prove herself worthy of being accepted. At that, she turned to face him, gave a frown and shook her head vigorously.

"I'm not scared!" she retorted, in her most confident voice. She turned her attention back to the entrance of the tunnel with her best poker face. "It's only darkness."

Lincoln grinned. "That's my girl! Now, you know the deal." He bent down and rested his hand on her shoulder, making Ashley's heart skip with a sudden excitement. "Let's see which one of you is brave enough to go the furthest."

As they approached the tunnel entrance, however, a sudden noise in the woods behind them caused all three trains to freeze. Ashley exchanged a look with Lincoln, who looked equally tense. They couldn't afford to be caught. He turned to his protégées. "Stay here, I'm gonna make sure there's nobody around. We don't want any trouble…"

At that, the two young trains were left alone. Ashley gave Hector a shy smile, unsure of what to say. Thankfully – and quite surprisingly – Hector was quick to initiate conversation.

"Don't worry, Ashley. My Grandpa was one of the old mine steamers. He still tells me all the stories, and he's been teaching me the songs the miner's used to sing to keep their spirits up in the dark." Ashley saw his brown eyes wander back to the tunnel, as if trying to imagine his grandfather working into its dark depths. It seemed to provide him with some comfort because his manner changed, and he adjusted his glasses with a chipper smile. "Although I won't dare tell him, I'd like to be able to go far and leave my mark for him."

Ashley gave a nod of approval. "I'm sure he'd be proud of you if he knew!" she said, before giving a nervous giggle. "We could get into big trouble if we get caught."

"It'll be worth it all if it means everyone will stop picking on us though! Just think, Ashley!" Hector's face brightened and Ashley could tell he was thinking about finally having more friends, of having the other engines be impressed by his show of bravery.

Ashley couldn't deny the giddy feeling the thought brought too. All she had ever wanted was to have the other girls to play with; to help her plait her hair and wear pretty dresses with.

Ashley heard the sound of wheels, and she turned to see Lincoln returning from the woods with a satisfied expression. "No adults in sight. Must have been an animal." he shrugged. "Right, let's get the show on the road!"

Hector gulped loudly, not even trying to conceal his nerves in that moment as he cast Ashley a sideward glance before he slowly stepped forward, preparing to light up his firebox to give him a boost.

"Hey, steamer!" Lincoln folded his arms, unimpressed. "Don't go lightin' up that firebox of yours now! This should be fair and square!" He jabbed a thumb at Ashley. "The little lady doesn't have engine power, does she?"

Hector sighed, his shoulders sagging in disappointment. Ashley knew the power from his firebox always gave him more confidence as well as providing him with more strength and energy. She gave him a sympathetic look, but these were Lincoln's rules. After just a few steps, he was swallowed by the darkness.

Ashley waited a few moments to give him a head start before she too tentatively made her way into the mouth of the shaft. As she entered, she could hear the echo of Hector's clattering wheels as they faded away. Being a fair distance ahead, she hoped she wouldn't stumble and slip down a steep hill and end up needing him to pull her out. What became apparent first was the eerie, musty chill that emanated from the walls and settled in the tunnel, causing the girl to start shaking. As she moved further in, the stagnant tunnel, devoid of all light and life, became more and more stifling and uncomfortable. She reached out to the touch the wall to guide her, feeling the crumbly, damp rock as she glided her hand along, the dusty residue clinging to her fingers. Her eyes scoured for any hint of direction, or even a glimpse of Hector, but she couldn't see anything. It was as if a black veil had been placed over her eyes, and she was beginning to find it unnerving. Then, she heard the faint sound of whimpering.

"Hector?" she called out.

"Ashley, I…I don't think I can go any further…" the young steamer's nasally voice quivered somewhere ahead of her.

"It's OK, Hector. You've got really far!" Ashley offered some words of encouragement, keeping her voice bright. "You don't have to go any further if you don't want to."

Her words were met by a sob. "I keep hearing things….I think I'm lost. I wish I could light my fire."

Ashley bit her lip. "Just stay where you are, and I'll come and find you."

She continued to move forwards, carefully minding her footing on the uneven ground as she blindly followed the rail of the mine track with her wheels. As her hand continued to brush against the cold wall, she noted there seemed to be large chips now flaking off and brushing her legs. She delved her free hand into her dress pocket on instinct and realised there was something rattling inside. It felt like rough cardboard, and Ashley suddenly remembered the box of matches her mother had given her. Excitedly, she began to pull it out.

Suddenly, there was a loud rumble that reverberated throughout the tunnel.

"What was that?" Hector squealed.

Ashley stopped in her tracks as another rumble pulsed through the tunnel, followed by deep tremors under her feet. This was not good. As she pushed herself closer to the wall, there was a loud crack as a deluge of dust and sand fell onto her head. The rocks were shifting. Too scared to move and disorientated in the pitch black, Ashley crouched down and curled up into a ball, clamping her eyes shut and praying for it to stop. She blindly fumbled for her match box, hoping she could at least light one so she could see. But as more dust and debris surrounded her she felt the cardboard box slip from her hand. Her head screamed for her to get out. Heart hammering, she forced herself to her feet and turned to make her way back to where she thought she'd come from. But as she did, her hands met solid, cool rock; her exit was blocked. She was trapped. Now, she found it hard to breathe. It felt like the walls were folding in on her.

"Lincoln!" she shrieked, not caring that she was now crying hysterically. "Lincoln, help!"

A sudden flicker of light between the cracks of rock startled her but gave her hope as she noticed a gap in the wall blocking her way out. In seconds, Lincoln's face appeared, and he shone his flashlight through the crack, momentarily dazzling Ashley's vision and making her self-consciously wipe away her tears. The light disappeared, before she heard the diesel engine grunting as he used brute force to push the fallen boulders. Ashley watched as the gap grew bigger and she didn't hesitate to take the opportunity. She squeezed herself through, and Lincoln grabbed her wrist. Together they bolted back up the track to the exit. In seconds, they burst into the warm spring air. Ashley stumbled to the ground, blinded by the sudden burst of light. As her eyes began to adjust, she realised her hands were covered in a fine layer of dirt and dust, her knees grazed. She whirled her head around to the mouth of the tunnel. There was no sight or sound of Hector. As she shakily got to her feet, brushing herself off, she noticed Lincoln racing ahead to leave out of the corner of her eye.

"Wait, Lincoln!" She cringed at how small and pitiful her voice sounded, a far cry from the confident girl she had tried to be earlier in an effort to impress him.

When he didn't acknowledge her, she raced to catch him up, grabbing his arm with more force than she intended.

"What about Hector? We can't just leave him! We need to go back!"

Lincoln flinched at the girl's grip. Suddenly, he whipped around and snatched her wrist, making her gasp. "Listen to me and don't be a baby!" he snarled, his eyes narrowed. "We can't go back! And if anyone finds out that we were here, there will be serious consequences. Do you know what happens to trains who trespass? They get burnt on the scrapheap as punishment! You don't want that, do you?"

Ashley's eyes grew wide in horror, shaking her head vehemently, tears springing from her eyes once more.

Lincoln tightened his grip on her wrist to emphasise the seriousness of the situation. "You need to swear you'll not tell anyone that we were here, got it? We were never here."

Speechless, Ashley could only nod.

Then, the diesel leaned in and whispered in her ear.

"I won't tell if you don't."


Two days later, Ashley had rolled into the kitchen for breakfast and found her mother looking desolate and hopeless as she sat at the table, nursing a cup of coffee. Something was wrong. She had watched as her mother had lifted her eyes to meet hers, pulled out a seat next to her and patted it gently to summon her to join her.

"Come and have a seat, sweetheart. I have something to tell you."

Ashley had zoned in and out as her mother told her about Hector. How after an extensive search around the school, the woodlands, and the areas near Hector's home, the police had discovered him in his grandfather's old tunnel...that they'd ruled out any foul play…a tragic accident. She explained how Hector had been known to be a lonely boy who had a tendency to wander off alone and he had simply gone into the tunnel to explore in curiosity and had got trapped when the unstable ceiling had caved in and he had perished. The abandoned tunnel should have been sealed years ago.

The tears came quick and easy for Ashley. Just hearing how Hector had been found made her sick to her stomach. He had died alone, all alone in that cold, unforgiving darkness. He had been so frightened and they had simply left him. But what her mother thought were simply tears of grief for a tragic accident that had claimed the life of one of her classmates was secretly so much more. Ashley was wracked with guilt; she had failed Hector. She shouldn't have listened to Lincoln; she should have gone back to help. She should have been braver. She'd even lost the pack of matches nestled in the pocket of her dress; a habit her mother had instilled upon her as soon as she came of school age. If she'd remembered sooner, perhaps she could have given Hector a match to light his firebox and he would have been able to save himself?

In that moment, she desperately wanted to blurt our that she'd been there, that she had been in the tunnel too when the ceiling had collapsed. But she had sworn to secrecy. Do you know what happens to trains who trespass? They get burnt on the scrapheap as punishment! You need to swear you'll not tell anyone that we were here!

No, her mother could never know. So she stayed silent, simply burrowing her head in her hands. And in her head, all she could hear was Hector's desperate pleas for help, even long after she and Lincoln had ran away.


Ashley gasped as her eyes flew open, the echoing of Hector's cries still ringing in her ears. For a moment she lay paralysed, unable to move as her mind slowly detached from her dream. Instead, she concentrated on bringing her erratic heart under control as it pounded in her chest. Feeling her muscles relax as she was released from her dreaming state, she hastily wiped away stray tears before she carefully disentangled herself from between Buffy and Dinah as they continued to sleep soundly, being careful to not move the quilt they were sharing. Pearl had invited them over for a sleepover, and Ashley, knowing that nightmares had ravaged her sleep more often than not lately, had been reluctant to go, but she had felt inclined after seeing how excited the first class car was.

Gazing out of the window as she lit a cigarette, all she could feel was guilt and fear. It had been years ago and yet that fateful day still haunted her. It had been the start of a spiraling mess. She could never have known Hector's death would be the catalyst for so much more. And Lincoln, well, he was history. History she never wanted to revisit.

Ashley pressed her head against the window, finding the coldness comforting and numbing in equal measure. She just wanted this hell to end.

All she wanted was to be free.


*I'd like to think that Ashley, despite being bullied, wanted to be a smoking car just like her mum. She's mentioned as "the last one in the land" in the musical so I'd like to think she took over from her mum and became renowned for being the last smoking car in the country.

I'd love to hear your thoughts! Please feel free to review or send me a PM with your comments.