AN: So I know the passage of time hasn't been super clear, and that it's only been vaguely implied that everyone's "sections" (Edgar's, Meredith's, and Shelley's) have been happening at the same time as each other, and that each chapter thus far has only been like a day or a half day in time. In this particular chapter, Meredith's section takes place in the morning/afternoon, and Shelley's takes place at night. Not super important to the plot, but it was never stated, so I'm stating it now. Enjoy!

Chapter 10


Dear Meredith,

What I said the last time we spoke was uncalled for. I won't keep asking for your forgiveness when it's undeserved, but know that I am sorry, regardless.

I want to talk to you. I must have dialed your cell a hundred times already only to hang up before it even went through. I miss you. This house feels so empty without you here to make it home. I've considered putting the house up for sale. But it is our home, and I wouldn't dare touch it without talking with you first. I want to be a part of our family's next steps. Whether or not that includes me now or later in the future, I want to be a part of yours and Shelley's lives in any way you'll allow me to be. Our daughter is resilient as she is hard-headed, and I know she'll bounce back from this difficult transitionary period in due time. But you know as well as I do that she is confused and desperate for normalcy right now. She needs me, Meredith. She needs her parents, together. I need you. If I know you the way I do, you need some normalcy too. We can go back to that. Please, come back home, everything will be-

Meredith stopped reading, unable to take anymore. The letter went on for another page, but she had read more than enough to guess what its contents contained. With a disgruntled sigh she folded the letter back into its envelope to never finish. So Thomas was still persistent on coming back. Doubtless he was trying to persuade Shelley as well, likely filling her head with talk of "normalcy" as if their version of 'normal' had ever been anything to live by. Meredith could see through it easily, but Shelley? Thomas was right about one thing, and that was that the week of being holed up with relatives wasn't exactly doing Shelley any good. She was restless at best and paranoid at worst, quick to anger and even quicker to bolt the second she was reminded of the uncertainty of her future. Meredith and Thomas had done a splendid job of sheltering their daughter in the most stagnant, unchanging environment possible, and now that everything was changing at once, of course Shelley would be overwhelmed. Even Meredith was overwhelmed.

They hadn't spoken since their fight. Meredith knew that Shelley hadn't meant what she said, but it still stung, coming from her own daughter. Not as much as the hit had stung, she was sure. She hadn't thought, hadn't even registered what she had done until it was too late. She had done so well to keep it together, to hide how overwhelmed she was, but in that moment she supposed her frustration had simply come to a head. She wasn't mad at Shelley, not really. She was mad that everything had fallen to her to fix, and Shelley seemed so adamant to make her job harder for her in whatever way possible. Inviting Thomas back into her life, sneaking off to the institute every day, avoiding her mother at all costs…what was she thinking?

The phone rang then, and with practiced reflexes Meredith had the phone in hand before the high pitched trill had even ended.

"Hello?"she said quickly, hopes horrifically high, but for who, she didn't know. It was, after all, two days after the institute had called, and she was expecting word of Edgar. She was ready to go back to incessant calling and leaving long, desperate voicemails every hour. But she didn't know if she would make it until then, her nerves shot as they were. Every ring from the blasted house phone was potential news of catastrophe or of salvation and little in between. She didn't know how much longer she could take, jumping at a ring, wondering if this was it, if someone was about to tell her that she had lost her son forever, only to be answered by another damned sales pitch. She closed her eyes and braced herself.

"Mrs. Meredith Parker? Hello, this is Nancy, from Labor and Delivery at Wheeling Hospital. It took a moment for Meredith to recover from the relief or disappointment that it wasn't the institute, she couldn't decide which.

"Oh…Yes!"

"You called yesterday about finding your obstetrician's contact information?" Meredith was pacing now, phone in hand and dragging it along with her.

"Yes! Does he still work there at the hospital? The doctor that delivered my daughter?"

"Unfortunately he does not, he transferred to Children's Hospital of Richmond eleven years ago. Since you did seem to be in a rush last time we spoke, though, I did try to follow up and get you a number to call. Sadly, the doctor just remarried and is on his honeymoon at the moment and won't be back in his office for another three weeks."

"Three weeks? I can't wait that long. Are there records of the nurses' names who were there that day? Anyone? Please, it's extremely important. I need to find someone who was there the day my daughter was born."

"Hmm, I'm not sure if we have any records of the nurses scheduled that far back. I can check for you. Are you sure I can't find you another doctor that was working here around that time?"

"Not unless they were physically there, in the delivery room." Even if the doctor had told someone what he had seen, no one would believe him…Would they?

"Are you sure? We've had quite a turnover in the last couple years. If you have a question about yours or your child's medical history, one of our on-site doctors would be happy to"-

"It's not about that,"she interrupted, "But...fine. Anybody, then. Maybe they can give me a lead."

"Sure. Let me look a little more through our records and I'll get back to you." Meredith held back an exasperated groan.

"I'm sorry to rush you but, how long will that take exactly? This is an extremely time-sensitive matter."

"I understand. Let me do what I can and I'll update you with what I find tomorrow at the latest."

"…Thank you,"Meredith replied only because she had to, but doubtless the disappointment was all too apparent in her voice. The line went dead with a click and Meredith had to fight back a frustrated scream. Three weeks? She couldn't wait three weeks for the doctor that had witnessed Edgar's uncouth birth to get him to testify that he had witnessed an event he likely had tried hard to forget. She didn't know who else to contact, though. There was no one else to ask. The only people that were there that day were Thomas, at her bedside, the doctor, and…were there even nurses in the room? Meredith couldn't remember. She had done so well in the years following to forget that day ever happened. Cruel as it was to willingly erase her daughter's first moments in the world from her mind, her boy's piercing shriek and flailing, flapping arms had been so painful to think about the months and years following after that she now could barely remember anything regarding that day. Edgar needed proof that she was his mother? She couldn't even give him the memory of that day, only the pain associated with it. How was she to expected to save him when she had to rely on someone else's memory?


Shelley got off the bus as the sun dipped below the hills and the sky blazed orange. It reminded Shelley of the sunrise she and Edgar had shared in the woods. The sky, peering through the trees in hues of orange and crimson, a warning of what was to come. She remembered his hand in hers as they watched the sun rise higher, sunlight spilling into the open clearing in what they had thought was some kind of sign that they were meant to be there. The sun had felt nice as it did now, though not as nice as the hand wrapped so protectively in hers. Don't think like that, she quickly corrected herself, for the millionth time. It was hard not to think about it though. Even now, it was so strange that something that had felt so wonderful, so perfect, was suddenly, without any choice of her own…over. Over and wrong without a prayer of ever going back to that feeling of being loved and at peace. Even stranger to her was that thoughts of being with Edgar, of loving Edgar in every way, of making him happy….was suddenly corrupted by feelings of shame.

Her cousin's house was only two blocks away from the bus stop, and Shelley found herself at the door before she knew it, fishing for the spare key they had made for her and pushing the door open. She could hear her cousins talking loudly in the kitchen, their voices easily reaching her from here. She ignored them, kicking off her shoes and making a bee-line for the guest room she and her mother shared, hoping to sneak in a shower and then pretend to go to sleep early so she wouldn't have to be ambushed by her mother coming in.

She got a shower in easy enough, dressed in pajamas she had grabbed from the suitcases still piled in their old family car, and buried herself in the sheets even though it was only seven-thirty. She didn't care. She willed herself to go to sleep. The days were feeling longer the more she waited for some kind of word from Edgar and all she wanted to do now was get this one over with and bring in a new one. Tomorrow. Tomorrow for sure. She would hear word about Edgar tomorrow. She played this thought like a lullaby, repeating wordlessly in her head as if she could will it to come true.

"Shelley." She didn't realize she had actually fallen asleep when she suddenly felt a hand shake her awake. Turning blearily in a half-awake state, she saw her mother sitting at the edge of the bed, her face unreadable in the dim light of the bedside lamp.

"Mm? Whazzwrong?"she mumbled incoherently, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

"Edgar's awake." Shelley was up in a second, all pretenses of sleep immediately gone. Tomorrow had apparently come early.

"He's awake? When can we see him? Can we go now?" Meredith answered with a shake of her head.

"In the morning. He has some…restrictions on his visiting rights, although I don't know exactly what that means. He's only permitted us two to see him, though, and only for three hours a day."

"Only three?"Shelley echoed, her face mirroring her disappointment, "What then, are we going to have to take turns every day seeing him? No offense, but I'm not exactly crazy about the idea of going together."

"…I understand. I think we both have things we need to say to him alone. Yes, we can take turns, if that's what you want."

"Okay then, so if we only get three hours a day with him then I should"-

-"Hold on. Shelley, wait,"Meredith interrupted with a shake of her head, "Before we talk about Edgar, there's something we need to talk about first."

"What?"

"Last night. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for a lot of things, but hitting you was never something I ever in my wildest dreams imagined I would ever have to apologize for. That was completely out of hand." The silence in the room heavy with tension for a moment, but only for a moment. Shelley had known this apology was coming, and she was already prepared to hear it.

"…I'm… sorry, too. For what I said. I mean…about this being your fault. And about not loving Dad enough. I know Edgar being in that place doesn't have anything to do with you. I was just trying to get you mad because of other stuff…and… I guess it worked."

"I guess it did,"Meredith answered quietly, "We've both been really worried and holding a lot in lately, haven't we?"

"Yeah…I know. There's…a lot…I've just been wanting to talk to Edgar about…Having to wait like this…it really sucks,"she said, casting her eyes down at the covers, "I know I probably should have waited a while before I contacted Dad. I just…hate thinking about Edgar stuck in there, and Dad stuck in that empty house that we left him in, and me, stuck in here with nothing to do except worry about it all the time. It's not fair. To anybody. I just don't want to sit around and feel sad about it all the time. I guess being angry instead…at least it feels like I'm doing something about it." Meredith nodded silently in understanding.

"Are you angry with me?"

"…Yes." Meredith nodded, figuring as much.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." This didn't surprise Meredith either.

"Are we ever going to get to talk about it together or are you just going to talk about it with Edgar?"she asked, her voice a little quiet, a little unsure, maybe even a little cold. The hard edge to her question couldn't be helped, though. Now that Edgar and Shelley could finally be reunited, she could feel a coalition forming before it had even happened. Brother and sister united against the evil villain that had stolen their happiness away. If she wasn't the "bad guy" now, she sure would be by the time those two got together.

"Geez Mom, have a little faith,"she said a little curtly, "But yeah, I do want to see how he feels tomorrow." Meredith sighed, knowing this was inevitably going to come up.

"Shelley, I'm sorry, but I need to see him first."

"What?!"

"I know how worried you've been, and that you've taken all of this very hard. But there are things he needs to know that need to come from me. Please, let me have tomorrow with him, and I'll only come when he wants me there after that."

"But I've waited so long,"Shelley said in a half-whine, "You know he's not going to want to talk to you anyway, after everything you said to him!"

"I know. And I know he'd rather see you, too. No one knows that more than I do. Please, Shelley,"Meredith continued, a desperate look in her eyes, "Whether it hurts or heals, we need to have this talk. Let me have one conversation with him, and I can rest easier, knowing I've said what needed to be said. And then the two of you can have all the time in the world, if that's what you need." Her words were thick with an apology that didn't reach Shelley's ears and very well may never would.

Shelley didn't answer right away, her lips tightly pursed, her eyes scanning the bedsheets as an unfamiliar feeling swept through her. She wanted to ask, wanted to demand what kind of apology her mother was giving Edgar and not her. But she caught herself, realizing only then that an apology was something she had wanted at all. Her mother had destroyed both their happiness with just three words after all, and while it was easy for Shelley to shift her focus on Edgar, it was becoming harder still to hide how this was affecting her. Edgar, after all, was the real victim here. What was best for Edgar was all that mattered right now. At least, that's what she kept telling herself.

"…Fine,"she said, shoulders deflated and mouth turned downward in a frown.

"Thank you, Shelley,"she said, surprising her by kissing her forehead, "I am sorry about last night."

"S'fine,"Shelley mumbled, looking away, "I was being 'difficult.'" She indicated this with air quotes, and Meredith had to smile at the gesture, a familiar word Meredith liked to use in exasperation all too often to describe her teenage daughter.

"Mom?"Shelley called out suddenly as Meredith stood up to leave, "Are you mad at me? Or ashamed or sad or…anything?"

"I'm a little bit of everything this week, Shelley,"she answered honestly, "But never at you." She caught her daughter's gaze with a meaningful look before turning and exiting the room, her welcome deemed overstayed. Shelley watched her go, unsure whether she felt relieved or if she believed her at all.